My Alleged Husband

Chapter 2198: Chapter 2031: Nothing Is Impossible

Life is a long journey, and every step seems to follow a path I don’t wish to take. The smooth, easy roads seem unrelated to me!

”In your eyes now, you may think I’ve completely lost my mind, but do you realize this is the true me? I can give up everything for the one I love the most, even my reason. For him, I can do things without thought, driven by my heart, but I can’t do the same for you because you’re not the one I love in my heart. Even when I’m with you, though I may laugh sometimes, it’s not my genuine happiness. I just want to stay by her side, by the side of the one I love the most. This is something that can never happen, but I still hope, hoping that heaven will favor me someday!”

”Do you know that becoming like this, even the one you love the most, would be unable to bear it? How could he be heartless towards the girl he once loved so deeply, seeing her lose all reason, doing things without thought, recklessly blind? How do you think his heart would feel seeing you this way? Why, when you do these things, can’t you consider others’ perspectives and opinions? Why must you be so selfish? Your selfishness scares me. I won’t treat you like before, but you need not retaliate against me like this. Do you think I have no love for you? Do you think knowing the truth would make me hate you completely? You’re wrong, utterly wrong. Even after all this, I still see you as the person I care about most within my heart!

Can’t you try to love me just once? Look at your brother and sister-in-law, look how happy they are together. Look at Xiao Wei and Jiayuan, they are so happy and content now. Why can’t we live like them? Is it because you’re thinking of someone else and willing to pay all costs for it? Why treat me selfishly like this? Have I not given you enough love, not even a bit of sincerity from you? For years I’ve been waiting for you to one day fully focus your heart on me, but it seems that day will never come because your heart isn’t in this home. You’re here physically, but your heart isn’t. Why must I settle for the shell without gaining your heart? After all I’ve given, ultimately, I have your presence but not your heart, leaving me wondering how to cope with such a feeling?”

”I’m sorry, I know this outcome deeply wounds you, but since that day I looked at him, I vowed never to fall for anyone else in this lifetime. No matter how much they do for me, even if it means their life, the most I’ll feel is touched, but I can’t love them for my heart belongs to the man I love most; my heart can hold only him and no other man. Regardless of how the world ends or what challenges I face, I won’t regret my past mistakes. I have to bear the responsibility, hurt again and again. Please don’t make it impossible for me to return to life as it was. I truly regret it. What I’ve done can’t return to its perfect form, yet all I know is that I deeply love her. For her, I’m willing to pay any price. My life is depleted, and my beliefs are gone; what I give her now is my obsession. I’ve come this far by relying on my obsession with him to support me!

I know you are my husband, a fact that legally can’t be changed. We’ve been married and lived together for many years, but nothing can erase his presence deeply rooted in my mind. How could I lightly and easily forget him? If I could, I wouldn’t be fit to be your wife or the mother of our son. The best thing I can give you is our son, but I can’t give you my heart. I’ve given you lineage, but must bury my heart forever. My heart stays with him, even if he never returns; this love dwells in my life, remains when I die, because after death, I will carry this love into the grave, down to the earth. When I face reincarnation, I’ll still bear it, eternally remembering him, never forgetting!

Don’t think I’m overly sentimental or foolish, but for the person I love most, I’m willing to do so. Wouldn’t you do the same for me, abandon your family, your father, your entire clan? You say you can abandon it all, but I would do it for her, not for you. Maybe this hurts you more, but I must lay it all out today; otherwise, you’ll sink deeper, unable to break free. I’ve experienced his embrace and the love for him already. There’s no going back for me; I hope you won’t follow my path, and consider my inner choices!”

”I understand; in your heart, I can never surpass him. Since this is the case, what else can I say? You love him so dearly, you should be with him. Why waste time here with me? Don’t you see your presence constantly reminds me how much I erred in giving up everything for an unworthy woman, forgoing the good life I was meant to have?”

I don’t know what to say. He knows it’s all his fault, but is it entirely? Maybe that’s the case, but I have no other choice. Falling for the man I love most has left no room for retreat. Why force myself to turn back? Isn’t that too unfair?

Life is always like this, far from what we desire!