My Alleged Husband

Chapter 1605: Chapter 1399: koko

As for Old Master Zhang, his heart is truly in pain. He knows what kind of familial warmth his grandson wants, but he feels powerless. He knows that everything could be resolved with the simplest gesture, yet why is it so difficult in his family? Why? Is it just because this is a prestigious family, where all the wealth today was earned through hard work, without any illegal means? Why is their happiness repeatedly torn apart? It truly leaves him unable to balance his heart. He is not someone who forsakes dignity for appearances. Time and time again, he’s set aside personal principles, making exceptions for others. Yet why, why do they eventually come to hurt him again and again? Is it really right to hurt him like this?

Zhang Yichen, too, understands his grandfather’s inner thoughts. He knows well the suffering and conflict his grandfather feels, yet as a grandson, he is helpless. He can only watch as his family is hurt and saddened time and again by these events, standing silently aside, unable to help. This is such a severe sense of failure. For someone successful, this kind of setback is a crushing blow. Having lived a smooth life all along, why must he suddenly suffer so many blows? Is he truly so undeserving of happiness?

Though they both have their thoughts, when standing together, they choose to remain silent. They know better than anyone that some things are best left unsaid. Speaking them might mean they can never return to how things were. No one wants to see such an outcome for themselves. They’re not saints, they all need the warm harbor of family happiness. But why is heaven so unfair to them, repeatedly hurting their family and destroying the happiness they deserve? For anyone, this would be an unacceptable blow.

At the same time, they both choose to leave these words unspoken. Because once said, things change, making everyone feel awkward and heartsick. Even though they are the closest people, time and again, they refuse to return to his side, time and again causing hurt. This is a fact that no one can accept. They don’t want this kind of hurt, but it remains buried in their hearts, indelible.

”Grandpa, why do my parents never want to come back to me and care for their own son? In their hearts, is their own son really so unworthy of being cared for, even once? Even if just for me, couldn’t there be one exception? But why are they always so cold and unfeeling?

I really can’t understand why, where am I failing to win my parents’ love? Being abandoned once or twice should be enough, but why am I abandoned repeatedly throughout my life? Am I truly so undeserving of their love?

All these years, I’ve never received the love and care from my parents that I longed for. I’ve grown used to it, but how can my heart find balance? Watching others’ parents love their children so dearly, while mine avoid me, how can this junior ever be happy? I keep questioning myself, if my parents really don’t love me, then why did they bring me into this world? Was it merely to continue the family line, just fulfilling an obligation?

Grandpa, the pain in my heart is something no one can understand. It’s a torment from deep within the soul, the immense hurt caused by my own parents abandoning me. This is something about my soul that can never be changed in this lifetime. I know that what’s past is past, and no matter how hard you hold on, it has no meaning. But I can’t let go; it’s always been a nightmare deep in my soul. How can I just let go?

Sometimes I wish time could flow backwards. If time could rush back to the very beginning, how happy I would be. If my parents had shown me a little more love, how grateful I would be for my whole life. But they never gave me what I wanted, always forcing upon me what I didn’t. Ever since I was little, I understood the principle of not doing to others what you don’t want yourself. But why don’t my parents understand this? Why do they continually do things that hurt me? I really don’t understand. Am I still their own son?”

Old Master Zhang heard his grandson say these words, and his heart felt bad. He understood that this was the demon within his grandson’s heart. If he can’t walk out from this shadow, no matter how much he does, no matter how hard he tries, it would ultimately be to no avail. Everything depends on him experiencing and figuring it out himself to truly grow.

”Child, never dwell on these things that make you unhappy. No matter how your parents treat you, they are still your parents. No matter how much they hurt you, you still have to be grateful to them. If not for them, how could you have today? Whether it means anything to them or not, your life peak now, maybe for many is a height unattainable in a lifetime. Many would fight tooth and nail to reach this level, but never find a way into the upper echelons. You were born into wealth, your family background has far surpassed many. So never think about these things. Just remember to keep a grateful heart, no matter how your parents push you away. There will be a day of reunion in your life. Grandpa knows that those harms can’t be forgotten, but there’s nothing that can be done...”