My Alleged Husband

Chapter 376: Chapter 356 Ruthless_1

When Xia Jingyi heard her own son say he never wanted to see her again, her heart shattered in an instant. No matter what, she couldn’t accept her son not wanting her, even though he had made so many mistakes. She still hoped her son would call her ”Mom,” that he could call her anytime, anywhere, even if just for a word, it would send her into a frenzy of joy. But if it really was because of her that her son cut off all contact with her, and they became strangers upon meeting in the future, how could her heart withstand such a profound blow?

”Son, are you really saying all this to me just because I won’t reconcile with your dad for your sake? Do you really think this is fair to your mom? I don’t ask for much, I just hope that my son, my husband, could love me a little more. Your dad has no love for me now, and you, being grown up, should understand that a marriage without love cannot be happy. There’s no love for me in his eyes, so how can he possibly make me happy? Living together every day will only cause irreparable pain and torment to each other. Do you really have the heart to watch your parents torment each other every day because of you, my son? Do you really want to see the people who love you become numb to life because of yourself? Actually, mom knows clearly that you are a good child, but the love you have for mom and dad is misapplied. Mom and dad don’t not love you, it’s just that the love is too deep. You know, mom really has no way back now. From the day your dad asked for a divorce, such an outcome was already sealed. Can’t you understand that? What would you think if the person you love the most suddenly asked you for a divorce? Just losing your wife for a few days, your heart can’t bear the pain of longing, what about me, then? I have to bear my own husband’s abandonment, bear watching my husband change right before my eyes. How should my heart feel? In truth, people should be empathetic, we’re all emotional creatures; why force on others what you yourself do not want? ’Do not impose on others what you yourself do not desire.’ It’s bad for everyone! I know, mom suddenly saying this to you is really hard for you to accept, but one day you will understand that your dad and I divorced not because of you, but because the trust between a husband and wife is gone between me and your dad, the love between lovers is gone, and the courage to stay together for life is no longer there!”

”Don’t spout so much philosophy at me; I can’t understand it. I just want to know if you’re willing to make a sacrifice for me, to continue on with my dad, just for the sake of giving me a complete family, or to make up for the lack of parental love I’ve experienced these past several years!”

Xia Jing drew a long sigh. This was something she could not do because her husband was already walking in a different direction, and in this lifetime, they could never again be grasshoppers on the same rope.

”Son, I’m sorry, but I can’t give you any guarantees about this matter. Since your dad and I have chosen to divorce, then there’s no turning back. If there really was going to be a reunion, it would’ve happened before he came to find me. But I didn’t because I want to live for myself, I want to live for my son. I don’t hope that just because you need me to fill the gap in these past years of motherly love, I should continue to live together with your dad. That would only make us both very miserable. Actually, you see a lot of things very clearly; you just don’t want to say it in your heart, and you want to deceive yourself that none of it is true, but is that really useful? No matter what happens between dad and mom, I hope it doesn’t affect the trust and love between you and your wife. Mom knows how much you love your wife and how much she loves you, and you both would do anything for each other, even to the point of not caring for your own lives. Such love, your dad and I are very happy for it now, especially me. I can’t love recklessly like you anymore because if I continue this way, I won’t get any good results. Mom is slowly getting older now, while you are in the prime of youth—you should have your own lives, not to be marred by your parents’ issues time after time. No matter what your wife says or does, I hope you will give her more chances. This time it’s not your wife’s mistake, but your own. You shouldn’t have any secrets from her. Once there’s a lack of honesty between spouses, their relationship will only gradually come to an end. Openness is a way for married couples to get along. Mom has said so much, hoping you will understand her intention. Your wife must have already looked for you—why not just walk down the stairs? Why insist on your so-called pride to the point of hurting each other?”

”I’ve said it, don’t interfere in my affairs. I’ve also said, since you’re not willing to continue with my dad for my sake, then from now on we are strangers to each other, whether we meet or not, we are as strangers. Don’t tell anyone that we know each other, let alone that we are mother and son, because that only makes the pain in my heart throb. Watching my own mom abandon me step by step, watching my dad leave my mom because of me, how can I bear that? I truly don’t understand why you have to be so cruel, why do you have to hurt me until I’m covered in wounds to be satisfied? Do you have to see me dying, unable to wake up, to be satisfied? Do you have to watch me become numb, for you to be satisfied? Do you have to watch as I become so estranged that I recognize no kin, for your hearts to be happy? I don’t want to talk much with you, I have things to do, so I’ll leave it at that!”

Zhang Yichen finished speaking and hung up the phone. He didn’t want to say another word to his mom; he felt that it would only make him feel more pain inside. How could he accept it, when his mother caused him more pain than a stepmother would?

When Xia Jing heard the sound of the phone hanging up, she knew her son was truly angry.