My Alleged Husband

Chapter 1750: Chapter 1544: Faded

When I open the faded album between us.

I only realize you’ve been gone for so long, but now if you truly come back again, would you still love me as you did before? You know this is something that brings joy but also causes torment.

We once held hands and walked through so many paths together, but now they’ve been drowned by my tears, and I miss you deeply.

Zhang Zhentian knows that Xia Jing’s willingness to make such concessions today for him is already a big deal; if he keeps asking for more, he would only become greedy. How could he allow the woman he loves to be excessively hurt over and over because of his demands?

For her, what she wants is slowly coming true. Perhaps heaven will not disappoint her request; she only wishes to keep her family by her side. Maybe soon it will come true; as long as she stays true to herself, it will eventually be realized one day.

Xia Jing looks at Zhang Zhentian as if seeing him for the first time; she knows her husband has fallen deeply in love again. This time, perhaps he will be so trapped that he can’t extricate himself, but this is not what she wants to see.

She never thought things would become like this; yet everything has become a fact, a situation that’s hard to change. So what can she do to alter it?

Who wouldn’t exploit others for their own selfish desires? Who wouldn’t sacrifice everything to harm those who care most for them in pursuit of what they once wished to have?

People climb step by step; everyone climbs on others’ shoulders, desperately trying to rise. But who knows that because of their relentless climb, this situation has become like this, leaving no solution, making everyone ponder how many mistakes they’ve made in life?

”Xia Jing, thank you! The decision you made today was an unexpected joy for me. I never thought you could truly be moved by me. I’ve been waiting day by day for this moment, and I can’t believe it finally arrived!

Perhaps you don’t understand how much I wish you could become the person I envision. All I desire is you; even if I had the whole world, I would only want you, to have you by my side, to know how much I sincerely want to be with you!

Maybe in your eyes, everything I say is merely lies to deceive you, but do you know every word I say to you is heartfelt? I’ve never intended to lie to you, even if you resorted to deception to hurt me, even knowing all the truths, I still choose to trust you unwaveringly because of my love for you, which no one else can comprehend.

My sincere feelings for you have been repeatedly disappointed; my affections for you always feel like a deceit to you.

You never considered my feelings, and in that moment of despair, you cannot fathom my inner turmoil.

But now, I have become so numb for you, even hurting my family again and again for your sake.

I no longer know what I’m incapable of doing, so I sincerely hope you won’t push me over and over. I just want a peaceful life; don’t torment me further, okay?”

Xia Jing feels there’s nothing she can say immediately to reply to her husband; insistence is impossible. Without mutual feelings, why be together? It would only add to each other’s worries.

Rather than being together and making life unbearable, it’s better not to be together, giving each other a retreat, a chance of living happily. At least a life remains in this world. She truly doesn’t know how to express her thoughts to her husband.

Maybe when she reveals her inner thoughts, her husband might become irrational, taking more reckless actions, which isn’t impossible.

”Zhentian, actually, I don’t know how to talk about certain things with you right now because I’m afraid once I say them, you’ll become even more unreasonable.

You know how everyone climbs the ladder step by step, achieving success through relentless effort. We’ve become like this—you think we can go back to how it was before?

Even if you pretend nothing happened, that none of it matters, do you think my heart wouldn’t feel any guilt?

I’m not heartless; I’m aware of everything you’ve done for me. I’ve chosen silence; I feel that by continually being silent, pretending not to understand, maybe one day you’ll give up. But I didn’t expect my silence would last for decades, and you silently continued giving for so many years. These feelings are not worthless to me; they’re too precious, and I don’t know how to bear them.

Perhaps you feel your efforts for me are worthwhile, but in my eyes, they’re not. They’re merely your foolishly giving everything alone!

Sometimes, I truly want to tell you loudly that I want to be happy with you, but I’m not a saint. My heart can only love one man, even if occasionally moved by you, it’s not love, merely a reaction to your sacrifices!

You should understand that being moved isn’t love. Choosing a lifelong partner solely because of fleeting emotions is unrealistic. This cruel society forces us to confront the reality of our choices.

Do you understand what I’m saying?”

Zhang Zhentian understands completely, but he doesn’t want to admit it. He can only continue the foolish pursuit, hoping one day heaven will truly favor him.

”No matter what, I sincerely thank you for giving me this opportunity. Thank you for trying to love me this time. It’s great news for me, and I won’t demand more, as doing so would only backfire!”

Although I lost sight of you, I also learned more about myself. I am stuck in my promises, deceiving myself, without knowing why.