My Alleged Husband

Chapter 2080: Chapter 1913: Morning

The morning’s lamp is my yearning for you; when will you return?

”Do we have to meet like this from now on, because we were once so in love, and now we must be strangers? Do you think this is too cruel to me? You know I can’t let go, so why make me accept this pain? You really leave me no choice!”

”I can tell, the emotions between you two must have been good, so why choose to give up now? Such a good wife struggles inside for your daughter, while you wander outside restless. Do you know you’ll make things hard for your wife? She only wants to give you a healthy and happy baby. Sometimes things happen faster than you expect, catching you off guard, reminding you that on the path of life, you must remain vigilant anytime and anywhere. Otherwise, one day you might fall behind, and others will step on you!”

Xia Jing knows these words are meant for him, but he has no evidence, he cannot copy such words.

Once so deeply in love, how did their relationship become like this in old age? I never imagined such an ending in my life. I wish this never happened, but why won’t heaven give me one more chance? All I want is to return to the past, to make amends with my wife — is that so hard? She’s utterly given up, never to turn back to me, while I remain stuck in the past, unable to free myself...

”That’s how people are, never satisfied with what they have, only realizing its importance once they lose it. They’ll pay any price to retrieve it, but can they really succeed? Can lost things truly come back? Time has moved on; can you make time rewind? It’s impossible, yet why remain obsessed? Perhaps it’s a thread of hope to keep living!”

”Indeed, we have no more connections. Though these years he lived well abroad, happy without me, lived as if I were by his side, happily... Why do I still cling to them? Why not give him a chance? Is it just for my own narcissism, to hurt so many people? Just for my pride, to burden others with consequences from my past mistakes? I shouldn’t be so selfish; the truth will come out someday. Even now, I can’t remove this person from my heart, but maybe one day I can let go because this love was never mine. Even if together, this marriage would never bring happiness...”

”Do you think he is right for me? We defied everything to be together once, even against our fathers. Now looking back, I was so unreasonable; how could I speak that way to my own father who loves me dearly? As time passes, everyone changes in mindset; some things become clear. Yet some remain forever trapped in a dead end, never able to escape...”

”Some people live on, not by external things, but by that thread of longing, a stubborn belief, granting them life for years, even decades. Without a belief, how can one continue living? He doesn’t want his world to crumble, and believes that seeing those he cares about bring forth the children he hopes for, is enough for everyone. A person shouldn’t be too greedy, should they? Greed can’t yield good fruit!”

”Am I greedy? I don’t think so; I just wish to see my loved ones grow happily — isn’t that good? I want a lifetime with my loved ones — isn’t that good? Sometimes, I can’t understand why my hard-won marriage is repeatedly sabotaged by me. It could last forever, yet I play the villain, shattering my marital happiness!”

...

Zhang Zhentian spent a long time in conversation with himself, finally realizing he doesn’t want his wife to leave him like this. Yet he now feels, if she can find greater happiness and joy, that’s all he wishes to see. He doesn’t ask for much — if those he cares about live happily, even without him around. That’s enough for him. Xia Jing achieved this; despite losing Zhang Zhentian, she lived freely abroad for five years, having once been devastated by divorce, nearly suicide. But looking back now, how childish and absurd it seems — why give up one’s precious life for a man? Although people say: Life is precious, love is more valuable. For freedom’s sake, both can be sacrificed.

Zhang Zhentian pondered for a long time, finally understanding that no matter right or wrong, he shouldn’t punish himself like this. He should wholeheartedly wish happiness for his beloved wife, so she can live freely without him. This is the greatest gift, isn’t it? His deep love for Xia Jing led to heartbreak, but now Xia Jing lives joyfully without him, which he sees as a blessing.

Never feeling cold, though ultimately alone again!