My Alleged Husband

Chapter 1966: Chapter 1760: Despair

Sometimes, reflecting on the path you’ve walked is a form of self-harm.

Zhang Yichen looked at his wife, still hesitating, and he realized her heart was burdened too. Why did he have to plead with his wife for another child so desperately? He just wanted their child to have a sibling, to grow up healthy and happy. Even if one day he left this world, maybe the outcome would be different.

”Honey, have you not forgiven me yet? I know the things I’ve done are hard for you to forgive, but you should also try to see it from my perspective. If you knew your husband had done such things, it would be difficult for you to accept, just as it is hard for me to forgive myself. Can we switch roles for a moment? Give me another chance. Let’s not make things so awkward between us. Let’s give our son a brother or sister, someone to accompany him as he grows!”

”Husband, that’s not what I mean. I’ve forgiven you. No matter how harsh your words were or how you’ve insulted me, I’ve always wanted to spend my life with you. You’ll always hold the most important place in my heart. I haven’t agreed because I just don’t want another child right now. With Grandpa in the hospital, our child undergoing rigorous training, and unresolved issues between us, should I get pregnant now for the sake of winning back the family’s favor and respect?”

You might think I’m being hypocritical, but do you know how it feels for a woman to only be respected and cared for by her family because she’s pregnant? What’s the point of staying in the family under such circumstances?

I have no other intentions. I just want to live a peaceful and happy life at home!

Husband, when I truly want a child, I’ll wholeheartedly have our love’s fruit with you. Right now, I’m unsure whether you still love me. If I were to have our child now, where would that place our child between us? Born of love during conflict or to quell anger?

To be brutally honest, it might not even be a fruit of love but of our anger. Do you think the child would be happy born out of such circumstances? No parent wants their child to start life without happiness and joy. I can’t bear it!

Besides, I’m afraid this child would face the same fate as his brother. I don’t want him to suffer. I don’t want my children to endure pain through rigorous training just to prove themselves. It’s exhausting. They are my children. As a mother, I hope they live safe and sound. I’m not a Saint. I can’t happily watch them go through hellish training!

I genuinely hope you understand my good intentions. I’m not cold-hearted, nor do I refuse to have our child, but I need to calmly think about our next steps to avoid us being so passive. I’m a mother, and I just want my child to avoid this painful training. That’s enough for me!”

Zhang Yichen understood what his wife truly felt. As a father, he also didn’t want his child to endure the same suffering he once did. He hoped his child could grow up healthy with both parents by his side.

He himself lacked parental love. Now, even with both parents present, why is their son undergoing such rigorous training—just to prove to his parents that he’s remarkable?

Sometimes he couldn’t fathom what his son was thinking, knowing full well it leads nowhere but still forging ahead, hurting himself in the process.

”Zhihan, since you’ve said all that, I have nothing else to add. I’ll respect your decision. I believe one day you’ll be ready to have another child with me. For now, just live well and don’t dwell on the past. Let bygones be bygones. Let’s live a quiet, happy life together.”

”I know everything you’re doing is for the good of our family. I also know you don’t want our son to suffer. I’ve already suffered once; how can I let my child suffer again? As a parent, I wish for my child to live carefree. Having endured such pain myself, as a father, why would I want my child to endure it again? That torment leaves unforgettable marks. I’ve walked every step here with a heavy burden, and everything I have today is achieved through my efforts. I have no regrets. I don’t want my child to endure hardship despite good conditions, but this is something the Zhang Family’s children must experience. Only by becoming an Upper-class Person can no one trample over them.

I believe you don’t want to see our child’s dignity trampled. For a child, it’s a humiliation; for a man, it’s a personal affront to his dignity. No man can tolerate such an insult. I believe our child choosing this path is the best decision!”

Painful memories make him repeatedly recall the hurt he’s suffered, unable to forget.