High School of Demon Hunting

Chapter 2037: Chapter 258: Standard Response

Xiao Xiao wasn’t the only one interested in the ”last three minutes.”

In fact, after getting up on Sunday morning, paper cranes flew one after another to dorm room 403 — among them were interview invitations from the campus newspaper or Beta Town Post, anonymous little curses (Zheng Qing had a baseless suspicion that most of these came from Alpha Academy), and applications trying to join the Absolution Hunting Team again.

The most mentioned topic in these letters was curiosity about what exactly happened in the last three minutes of the selection competition last night and how that hunter from Absolution held on until the end.

For this kind of information, Zheng Qing uniformly marked them as read but did not reply.

Besides that, many paper cranes simply took on the task of greeting cards.

Every time such a paper crane was opened, it would make a crisp sound like firecrackers; some even had shiny light and shadow effects or snowflakes that looked as if they were dusted with rainbow colors.

”Congratulations to the Absolution Hunting Team! You are the pride of Jiuyou Academy!”

Xin Fat Man read the contents of the letter and tossed it into the box on the desk — there was already a thick stack of similar letters in there — and then he complained: ”...So unoriginal... the blessings are all pretty much the same, but the swear words have come up with quite a few new tricks.”

As he spoke, he happened to open another plain red paper crane.

A huge pair of lips, as voluptuous as Angelina Jolie’s, suddenly appeared in mid-air, and a sharp, high-pitched voice almost shattered the glass: ”Liar! Cheater! Scoundrel!...”

”Remove the disturbance, don’t touch my tongue!”

Xiao Xiao lazily flicked her law book, and a spell flew from the bamboo slips on the desk, easily dispelling the little curse in mid-air, preventing it from uttering even worse words.

”To be fair, the one who wrote this letter is probably a very cultured witch,” Dylan, leaning on the edge of the coffin, said, his thoughts peculiar: ”Normally, to insult someone, you’d choose a worse mouth, like a female yaksha or a female ogre... full of yellow fangs, crooked, and emit a stench... Choosing such beautiful lips, even if she insults someone, it doesn’t feel that bad.”

Xin Fat Man squinted his eyes and sized up Mister Blood Werewolf.

”It’s most likely not ’cultured,’ but ’perverted,’” Fat Wizard said with a slightly sarcastic tone, unabashedly expressing his attitude: ”If your standard for ’cultured’ is so low, I really doubt if you can tell the difference between an asshole and a sewer hole.”

”When I was young, there weren’t any sewers in the castle,” Dylan said, his tone slightly melancholic, as he recalled: ”People in town would defecate on the streets... you know stilettos? They were originally invented to avoid stepping in shit when walking on the street...”

Xiao Xiao rolled her eyes, automatically tuning out the increasingly crude discussion between his companions.

He crumpled an insulting letter, rolled it into a ball, and threw it at Zheng Qing, who was lying on the bed: ”Silence won’t solve any problem! You always have to come up with a reasonable response...”

”Right away... just a moment!”

The young cost student bit the pen shaft, continuously revising the draft in front of him. Moments later, he jumped up from the bed, excitedly looking at his companions: ”Come on, listen to this response...”

The other three simultaneously looked at him.

”Ahem!”

The captain of the Absolution Hunting Team cleared his throat: ”We have noted certain remarks regarding the school hunting competition and are keeping a close watch on them. The position of the Absolution Hunting Team in the hunting competition has always been consistent: any rule-breaking conduct by a hunting team must be punished, and the purpose and principle of the hunting competition should be upheld together. The Absolution Hunting Team always requires itself to adhere to the philosophy of ’faster, higher, stronger, cleaner,’ and resolutely supports the ’frugal hunting competition’ and ’green campus cup’ advocated by the school hunting party this time. Every final result of a hunting competition is closely linked to the full strength of each hunting team. Absolution will continue to perform well in every competition from a performance perspective. The school hunting competition is in progress. The Absolution Hunting Team calls for all parties concerned about this event not to be troublemakers spreading lies but to be builders of peace, stability, and unity in the school.”

After reading, he looked at everyone expectantly.

Xiao Xiao blandly adjusted his glasses; Dylan showed his small fangs, seemingly having a toothache; only Xin Fat Man crossed his arms in front of his chest, stroking his chin with a thoughtful expression.

”How is it?” The young cost student chuckled awkwardly.

Fat Wizard nodded: ”Sounds interesting.”

”It seems like a lot was said, but nothing really at all,” Mister Blood Werewolf commented: ”If I were the one asking, I would probably follow up with ’what exactly happened in those last three minutes?’.”

”Please stay tuned to the upcoming matches of the Absolution Hunting Team, thank you,” Xiao Xiao replied with a cold smirk.

Zheng Qing approvingly gave a thumbs-up.

”How did the Absolution Hunting Team defeat an existence with Big Wizard combat power?” Dylan switched to another question.

This time, it was Fat Wizard who answered him.

”Every final result of a hunting competition is closely linked to the full strength of each hunting team. Absolution will continue to perform well in every competition from a performance perspective,” he replied in Zheng Qing’s tone, repetition of the just-read response, much like the Green Skin Parrots patrolling the first floor of the office building.

”Bingo!”

Zheng Qing burst into laughter, nodding in satisfaction: ”That’s right, we shouldn’t fall into others’ contexts and logic; just answer in our own rhythm.”

”Really a lot of beautiful nonsense.”

Mister Blood Werewolf shrugged, slipped back into the coffin like a slug, and his voice instantly became muffled: ”The journalist from Beta Town Post won’t be happy with your kind of answer.”

”If they aren’t happy, then I’ll be even happier,” Zheng Qing thought of past experiences, the corners of his mouth rising involuntarily as he flicked the parchment in hand, becoming increasingly satisfied with its content.

Xiao Xiao poured a bucket of cold water on him.

”Others aren’t necessarily going to directly quote your response,” he gave an example: ”They just need to write a few statements like, ’when faced with inquiries from journalists, the Absolution Hunting Team was tight-lipped about what happened in the last three minutes’ or ’avoided discussing the specific circumstances at the time,’ etc., and they’ll immediately paint you as ’suspicious’.”

Xin Fat Man poured another cup of cold water: ”And among the inquiries, aside from malice, there are also those who are purely curious... Responses that are too formulaic might leave them disappointed.”

”Disappointment is better than some worse outcomes,” the young cost student sighed: ”If it weren’t for the whole situation being too delicate, I wouldn’t resort to such a clumsy way.”