My Alleged Husband

Chapter 1903: Chapter 1698: Downfall

I am certain I can wait for you to return, no matter how long, even on the day I grow old, I will still wait for you to come back.

Zhang Zhentian feels that no matter what he says to his father now, it has no effect. The only thing he can do is to make his father happy, but the pain of unrequited love is something he truly no longer wants to experience. It is the pain he most wants to avoid in this lifetime.

”Dad, I know that everything I’ve done has greatly disappointed you, but all I want is to be able to be by the side of the woman I love the most. Do you understand? Through the years, I have traversed the ends of the earth for her. When she left, I did not abandon myself; I strived to win her back in every way. My actions are not driven by a fleeting impulse; I simply want her to be by my side.

Even though her deep feelings may not be for me, as long as I can see her, I feel at ease. This is a feeling you cannot understand: wanting to stay peacefully by her side. Is it too difficult for you to accept, making you think repeatedly that everything I’m doing is merely pretentiousness?

Have you ever experienced the bitterness of love and inability to attain it? Can you comprehend the deep pain in my heart?

This anguish is something no one can change. Since I chose this path, it demonstrates my desire to spend my life with her alone. Regardless of what the outcome may be, no matter how many storms we face together, those days are rare: two lovers joining hands to conquer the world. Who can truly understand that feeling? Who can feel it for me?

All of this relies entirely on myself. I don’t want much, but repeated heartbreak and sorrow have ultimately struck a deep blow to me, allowing me to peacefully stay by her side, accompany her. Since I chose and hurt you initially, now I cannot choose to hurt her to protect you.

If I really choose to do so, it would undoubtedly result in hurting each of you once again completely. No one wishes for such an outcome, right?”

”Child, maybe the feeling of unrequited love that you speak of, I truly cannot understand or feel. Your mother left me so many years ago; do you know? Even if no one else understands me, shouldn’t you understand how deep my pain is as a father?

You love your wife; because of our interference, you cannot have her—that is unrequited love. Your heart is pained, but what about me? I loved your mother too, but she has completely left this world. My love for her is equally unrequited yet even more difficult; your wife is still alive; you can argue with her anytime and bring her back, but what about me? I have no means to do so because she has left this world. Even if I want to find her, I can never do so again; she can only live in my memory forever.

Actually, I really hope you can genuinely think carefully about what you truly want. But over these years, despite the many mistakes you’ve made, you never considered what I most desire in my life. You have become numb and lost in your life’s path, not knowing what you truly want, transforming your life’s journey step by step into what it is today.

Perhaps you think your life is quite good now, carefree and comfortable, but you’ve forgotten those who were hurt because of you and how much pain they endure.

You are now telling me how painful unrequited love is, how much it hurts. We have all experienced it. Everyone has gone through this, becoming numb, not knowing what kind of life to live. I have repeatedly pushed myself to the edge; I want to make sure that my intellect is never deceived by future benefits.

Reaching where I am today wasn’t easy. My group and company achieving this conclusion are even harder won. I have accomplished it all through painstaking efforts without relying on anyone; I started from nothing. Yet, I provided you with a comfortable life, and what I received in return were repeated sarcasm and abandonment!

As you do all these things, you never consider how much we, as parents, love you. We sacrificed so much for you, but no matter how much effort we put in, to you it seems no more than a dream. You do not care because deep down, you don’t even know whether you need to protect the family, whether you want to live together or not.

Your life has truly been a series of failures. You sacrificed so much for yourself and more for your wife, sparing no cost to flee with her, even foregoing your own child, only to end up committing mistake after mistake.

You have made so many mistakes, yet you haven’t understood whether you’ve really erred. Just knowing where you went wrong is unclear, nor do you know what to do next. You treat everyone else as demons, yet the true demon is yourself, destroying everyone’s happiness time and again, ruining your life in the pursuit of your so-called grand ideals.

Think about it: despite your wife being beside you all these years, was she truly happy being with you? Did she ever yearn for her child, thinking about returning to this family? The joy you momentarily felt became immense consequences at last, demanding a price. The price you paid resulted in repeated rejection, never to be forgotten in this lifetime. The harm given to you by your son, his choice to never forgive you as parents, what must you be feeling deep down?

Unrequited love is ultimately just a term. Whether it can truly be attained depends on one’s own destiny. If you choose to live well with her, then pursue her at any cost!”

I never thought that someday I would sink so deeply into my love for you, unable to free myself, and submerged within it.