My Alleged Husband

Chapter 1814: Chapter 1608: Adventurous Dreams

Looking back on those years and the adventurous dreams I had, it seems so naive and laughable now.

”Dad, I actually know that deep down, you really hope I could live a lifelong affectionate life with him, but I truly can’t continue anymore. The hurt he’s inflicted on me is not just once or twice. If the outcome was already predestined, then I don’t understand why I insisted on being with him in the first place. To be with him, I was willing to give up my own life, but in the end, what I got was his endless suspicion and distrust. Without even the most basic trust between a husband and wife, how can we have a long-lasting life together?

Perhaps everyone would doubt why I was with him in the first place, but regarding this matter, I have a clear conscience. I believe I have no shame before Heaven and Earth. I truly wanted from the bottom of my heart to stay with him for a lifetime, not because of his money, not because he was born into a wealthy family, and certainly not because he has such a powerful father.

I proceeded cautiously, always thinking as long as I could be with him, I didn’t need anything else. What was the result in the end? He hurt me so much, and eventually, I didn’t even understand how I was abandoned. Is there another woman as foolish as me in the world? Knowing my husband doesn’t love me, knowing that the one beside me is always suspicious and distrustful, yet I still wholeheartedly wanted to be with him, never considering to doubt him. Perhaps that’s just who I am, but it’s precisely this that has made everything so hard to accept now, causing immense pain within, a pain I can only silently endure because I chose to bring this hurt upon myself. I can only blame my own stupidity!

We all once threw caution to the wind for the ones we love, even willing to give up our lives for them. I believe in your heart, you can understand my inner pain. Your love for Mom is no less than my love for my husband, in fact, it’s even more. If even you find it hard to accept, how could someone like me?

I believe that when I decided to be with him, everyone doubted me, thinking I was blinded by money, choosing to live with a man like him. But I never cared about others’ idle talk; I always felt as long as I was happy, it didn’t matter what others said behind my back. But what is the reality? I gave up everything, what I got in return was his distrust. I was willing to pay any price for him, yet in the end, he treated me like an enemy, cruelly kicking me away. Does he truly not know how I feel? Am I truly unable to be with him?

I once thought the distance between us was too far, something I couldn’t bridge, so I tried desperately hard. As long as I could close that distance, I could spend my life with him, and I would be so happy and excited. I couldn’t sleep every night from excitement, but the reality harshly slapped me in the face. Without his love, no matter how much I love him, it’s useless!”

As Xia Jing spoke, tears rolled down her cheeks. Her heart was truly overwhelmed with grievance. All those years of love ultimately went to waste.

She gave everything for this man, was even willing to give up her life, but in the end, had to accept the reality of being abandoned.

Despite being willing to give up everything for him, he only saw her as a tool, never truly treating her like a real person. How could her heart not harbor hate? How could there be no resentment? No one would ever truly understand how much pain she felt inside. Although there were countless grievances she couldn’t voice, no one could empathize with her sincere heart. She was always seen as wrong, who would have thought that the once-imposing leader of the Mercenary Group would eventually face abandonment?

”Child, no one in this world grows without experiencing pain. Pain is always part of the path to growth. To grow, one must endure these hardships, right? Only through overcoming these torments can one grow happily. Maybe not everyone understands this, but I believe you do, because your experiences are deeply profound. You’ve been through a truly unforgettable journey.

Perhaps we did make unforgivable mistakes in the past, unsure of what to do because of them, but I hope you understand that someday we will meet again. Because by choosing this decision now, you might regret it in the future. Don’t give up your life’s happiness over a moment of impulse. I know how upset you are, but I also know you feel there’s no other choice. Since it has come to this, you can only face it calmly. I understand your helplessness, but there’s always a way. It’s impossible to just find someone casually and spend the rest of your life with them. A marriage without love won’t be happy, and a relationship without trust won’t last...”

”I understand all these truths. But precisely because I understand, I had to make such a decision. I don’t want to give up everything for a man anymore. To give up everything for a man and not know how to happily live the life I want, just to be abandoned in the end, I don’t want. I refuse to live as a weak and incompetent person. I’ve already given too much for him; my heart is frozen. Since this ending is destined, why should I hold on? Why not let go? Ah, this is the greatest pain for both sides. He may think it’s no big deal, but the hurt he caused me is indelible in my heart.

The love we once shared, it’s time to end it. Everything we had is now meaningless together. He’s already abandoned me, so why should I keep holding on? Even if he begs me to come back now, I won’t turn back...”

I accompanied you in madly traversing the world, only to end up with a cruel ending.