My Alleged Husband

Chapter 1059: Chapter 912: Never Regret

”Yichen, everyone in this world is the same; not many are good people. You may feel that I’m generalizing everyone with this statement, but some things you only understand once you’ve experienced them yourself, realizing just how disgusting they truly are!

You must understand, there are far too many people like that in the world. Sometimes, once you open your mind a bit, nothing seems to matter anymore.”

Zhang Yichen never expected his mother to have such thoughts today, nor did he anticipate her using this approach to enlighten him. He had imagined countless times that when he faced difficulties, his family would offer their help. Yet, he never thought this day would actually become a reality. When this day became real, he couldn’t fully articulate his joy from deep within his heart. Initially, he believed everything would always be like this, but he never anticipated facing greater upheavals afterwards. Repeated family turmoil ultimately caused him to lose confidence in his family and completely lose trust in his parents.

”Mom, I don’t need you to guide me in this manner, but I need you to speak your true feelings to me. I don’t want us to have disputes over trivial matters again and again. Do you know how many years I’ve longed to see this scene today, and who could understand the excitement and happiness deep in my heart at this moment? How much I wish this day could stay here forever, that time would freeze and never move forward. Although my family is unhappy at this moment, my mom and dad at least give me care and love, and how could I truly not feel happy deep down inside? Never imagined one day I would receive care and love from my parents. Now that the dream has come true, I’m truly happy, and I don’t know what words to use to express my current emotions, just how excited I am!”

”Child, if you need it, mom and dad will always be by your side, giving you all the care and support. No matter what hardships you face in the future, no matter what you’ll accomplish, I will give you the greatest support. On the day you make my dreams come true time after time, the day you make me feel this lifetime is the happiest, I will be filled with joy. Everything I’ve done, I’ve never considered what my life would ultimately be like, but today this scene stirs emotions deep within me. I never expected my son to say such heartfelt words to me.

Do you know how many years I’ve anticipated this moment, how long I’ve been waiting for it? Yet, only now did I finally see it. Do you realize how I’ve suffered, the pain and difficulty in letting go?

Perhaps I did many bad things in the past, causing harm to everyone around me, bringing unbearable pain to each person. But I believe as long as I sincerely repent, one day I will be together with the one I truly love.

I made many mistakes in the past; I know that. However, I also believe as long as I live honestly, I believe no matter when and where, I will become the person I most want to be. I’m not a Saint, I can’t make my inner self free of attachments. I want my heart to truly remember each story I’ve been through.

The truth is, living like this is indeed very hard. During the time between you forgiving me, each day was filled with pain, yet I never considered this outcome. But I still walked step by step to today. I don’t understand what kind of willpower allowed me to hold on until today. During the period when he hadn’t returned home, although I lived freely, I had no happiness. After returning home, despite the pain I felt, I truly began doing the things I most wanted to do. I achieved the ending I most desired. I have no reason to blame anyone else, the mistakes I committed ultimately must be borne by myself, to turn everything into clouds. If one is always thinking of avoiding them, it’s impossible to resolve anything. I feel every word you said these days is indeed correct. I never expected my husband would continuously avoid responsibility, nor did I imagine he could be so timid and weak. He is not the person I used to know. I have no idea what caused him to become this way today?

Perhaps in your eyes, you all believe his changes today are closely related to me, that I am the reason he is the way he is now. But who knows how difficult I’ve had it, how painful every action was, when and where others will understand the pain in my heart. I’ve held on until today step by step, but what is it all for?

Sometimes I feel truly foolish, but I was once again deceived by others. Yet, time and again, I place all my trust in them. I don’t understand why he had to do this, why I had to be foolish beyond remedy, why I had to bear the responsibilities I most never wanted to take in such a manner, and why did I end up in such an embarrassing situation?

Child, I know you want to ask me whether I’ve ever regretted all the actions and mistakes from these years. I can tell you very clearly now; I have never regretted any of them. Not only that, because there is no remedy for regret in this world. Even if you repent, what return can it bring? Even if you regret until your intestines are twisted in knots, there’s no outcome nor redemption waiting for you!

The greatest hurt in this world comes from betrayal. When someone chooses betrayal at that moment, it’s already destined there won’t be any outcome between you and them, whether they are friends, family or lovers. You’re no longer in the closest relationship because they no longer fit you. No matter how good you are to them, you’re nothing in their eyes, and their eyes can’t tolerate you, just like your eyes can’t accommodate sand, so it’s just game over for both of you!

When everything exceeds your imagination, but there’s nothing left to salvage, you will only recognize what has been lost, what was missed and what was sacrificed. You won’t know whether your past actions were right or wrong; you only know the mistakes you committed will perhaps let this lifetime never allow you to forget!”