Rebirth 1991: Keep the Fame, I'll Take the Royalties

The Muffin Equity and The First Client

”Cut!”

David Fincher’s voice sliced through the heavy, manufactured rain of Soundstage 4. He stepped back from the camera viewfinder, running a hand through his hair, his chest heaving as if he had just held his own breath for the entire sixty-second take.

For a moment, the silence on the set was absolute. The grips, the gaffers, the makeup artists—everyone was frozen. They had just witnessed something fundamentally unnerving. The kid in the bathtub hadn’t just hit his mark; he had swallowed the camera whole.

Then, the spell broke. A collective exhale swept through the room, followed by the frantic clapping of the two Levi’s executives.

”My god, David, that was...” the older executive breathed, practically jogging toward the bathtub. ”That was unbelievable! The intensity! It’s exactly what the market wants!” He reached out, fully intending to wrap Elias in a congratulatory, Hollywood embrace.

Elias van Kempen stood up, the freezing water cascading off his soaked white t-shirt and heavy denim. His lips were slightly blue.

He smoothly sidestepped the executive’s open arms with the agility of a matador avoiding a bull. He didn’t smile. He didn’t offer a humble thank you.

”A towel,” Elias demanded, his voice a flat, freezing baritone that instantly killed the celebratory mood.

A terrified production assistant rushed forward, draping a thick white towel over Elias’s shoulders. Elias clutched it tight, shivering visibly. But he didn’t head for the dressing rooms to change. He marched directly toward the folding table in the corner where the Production Accountant was sitting behind a metal lockbox, processing the extras’ vouchers.

The accountant, a nervous man in a sweater vest, looked up. ”Uh, Mr. van Kempen? Fantastic job. We’ll mail your check—”

”The water in that tub was approximately fifty-four degrees Fahrenheit,” Elias interrupted, leaning his dripping frame over the table, soaking the accountant’s paperwork. ”According to the Screen Actors Guild safety regulations, prolonged submersion in water below seventy degrees without a wetsuit constitutes a severe workplace hazard. I am currently experiencing the preliminary stages of hypothermia, induced by your production’s negligence.”

The accountant blanched. A massive, cartoonish sweatdrop slid down his forehead. ”H-hypothermia? Sir, we can get you a medic—”

”I don’t require a medic. I require financial compensation for assuming uncontracted bodily risk,” Elias stated, his teeth chattering slightly, though his eyes were as sharp as diamonds. He pointed a long, pale finger at the petty cash box. ”You can either disburse a one-hundred-dollar ’Hazard Pay’ fee in untraceable cash right now, or I will use the studio phone to file a formal union grievance that will shut down the rest of your shooting day.”

The Levi’s executives, who had jogged over to follow Elias, froze in horror. Shutting down the shoot would cost them tens of thousands of dollars.

”Just pay him!” the older executive hissed at the accountant. ”Pay him out of petty cash! Do it now!”

The accountant fumbled with his keys, practically ripping the lockbox open. He pulled out a crisp hundred-dollar bill and shoved it into Elias’s hand.

The moment the cash touched his palm, Elias stopped shivering. His posture straightened perfectly.

”Thank you,” Elias said, offering the accountant a brief, sociopathic smile. ”I feel remarkably warmer already.”

He turned on his heel and walked toward the dressing rooms, leaving a trail of water and utterly bewildered executives in his wake. He had just secured an instant cash injection to survive the Net-90 waiting period. Capitalism was a beautiful machine if you knew which gears to grind.

Twenty minutes later, Elias stepped out of the soundstage and into the blinding California afternoon. He had changed back into his faded, threadbare black jeans and his scuffed vintage leather jacket.

He scanned the immediate vicinity. Sitting on the concrete curb near a row of equipment trucks was Charlize. Her knees were pulled up to her chest, her oversized denim jacket swallowing her frame. Next to her was the canvas tote bag, slightly stained with butter and jam.

Elias walked over and sat down on the dusty curb beside her, his long legs stretching out into the asphalt.

Without a word, Charlize reached into her bag, pulled out a deeply deformed, squished blueberry muffin, and handed it to him.

Elias took it. He peeled back the greasy paper liner and took a bite. He chewed slowly, his brow furrowing in profound disappointment.

”The structural integrity is completely compromised,” Elias critiqued softly. ”And the jam is clearly laced with high-fructose corn syrup to mask the low-quality fruit. It’s a budgetary compromise pretending to be a premium pastry.”

Charlize let out a sharp, cynical laugh. Her South African accent clipped the edges of her words. ”You are completely out of your bloody mind. Ten minutes ago, you were sitting in a bathtub looking like a god who was too bored to smite us. You literally had studio executives ready to kiss your boots. And now you’re sitting on a dirty curb, in rags, complaining about free, stolen food.” She shook her head, looking at him with a mixture of amusement and deep suspicion. ”You’re a complete fraud, Elias.”

”I am not a fraud, Charlize. I am highly adaptable,” Elias corrected, finishing the squished muffin. ”The aura inside that studio is a product. I sell it at a premium. Out here, on the pavement, I am simply a man trying to minimize my daily caloric expenditures.”

Charlize snorted, brushing crumbs off her jeans. She pulled a piece of yellow carbon paper from her pocket—her daily extra voucher. She stared at it, her expression darkening into a quiet, frustrated scowl.

Elias didn’t ask her what was wrong. In his previous life, he had learned that asking for a sob story rarely yielded actionable financial data. He needed the raw numbers.

He locked his eyes onto the yellow slip in her hand and mentally pinged his loan shark.

[SYSTEM SHOP ACCESSED.][ACTIVATING: CORPORATE X-RAY SCAN][COST: -10 CP][CURRENT BALANCE: 25 CP]

[CHA-CHING!]

A translucent, red-tinted grid overlaid Elias’s vision. As he glanced at the yellow voucher, the system didn’t just read the ink; it pulled the institutional data behind the agency stamp in the top right corner. The text highlighted in blinding neon red.

[TARGET’S AGENCY: WEST COAST TALENT (TIER 3 PREDATOR)][CONTRACT TERMS: 40% GROSS COMMISSION. MANDATORY AGENCY HOUSING (BUNK BED IN 2-BEDROOM APARTMENT WITH 5 OTHERS). RENT CHARGED AT 200% MARKET RATE. 15% WEEKLY INTEREST ON OUTSTANDING DEBT.]

Elias’s eyes flickered, the system overlay vanishing.

He looked at Charlize. She was beautiful, talented, and utterly trapped in a classic Hollywood meat-grinder.

”So,” Elias said, his voice dropping into a casual, conversational tone, completely masking the digital espionage he had just committed. ”Your agency booked you for fifty dollars today. By my estimation, after their standard forty percent cut, you take home thirty.”

Charlize snapped her head toward him, her blue eyes narrowing defensively. ”How do you know what my agency’s cut is?”

Elias tapped his temple, deploying his Financial Alibi with flawless arrogance. ”I don’t need to read your contract, Charlize. I can calculate the tax deductions from your posture. You’re tense. You’re hiding food. You aren’t just broke; you’re actively in debt. West Coast Talent, I presume?”

Charlize sweatdropped, her mouth opening slightly. She looked genuinely unnerved. ”Are you a bloody wizard?”

”I am highly observant,” Elias corrected. ”And I know how the bottom-feeder agencies operate. They didn’t just sign you; they housed you. They put you in a two-bedroom apartment in the Valley with five other girls. They charge you double the market rate for a bunk bed, and they deduct it directly from your meager day rates. Am I close?”

Charlize swallowed hard, her defensive anger melting into a profound, exhausted humiliation. She looked away, staring at the hot asphalt. ”It’s a start,” she muttered bitterly. ”They fronted my visa paperwork and my flight from Johannesburg. I owe them three thousand dollars. I have to do what they say. I have to sit in the background and take the scraps until I pay it off.”

”Three thousand dollars,” Elias repeated, testing the number on his tongue. To him, it was a rounding error. To her, it was a steel cage.

He didn’t offer her sympathy. Sympathy didn’t pay the rent. He offered her a hostile takeover.

”You aren’t going to pay it off, Charlize,” Elias stated, his voice completely devoid of pity. ”That debt is mathematically designed to be infinite. By the time you earn a hundred dollars, the interest and the housing fees will generate a hundred and twenty in new debt. You are an indentured servant.”

She whipped her head back, her eyes flashing with renewed fury. ”I didn’t ask for your bloody analysis! What do you want me to do? Quit? Go back to South Africa and admit I failed?”

”I want you to fire them,” Elias said simply.

He reached into his jacket pocket and pulled out the small, blue vinyl checkbook Brenda had given him at the Bank of America. He flipped it open, showing her the temporary checks embossed with the name Sovereign Media.

”I am Elias van Kempen. I am the Managing Partner of Sovereign Media,” Elias lied, blending the truth with his phantom corporate illusion. ”I don’t just act in bathtubs. I acquire assets. And right now, Charlize, you are a highly undervalued asset being grossly mismanaged by amateurs.”

Charlize stared at the checkbook, then up at his face. ”Sovereign Media? I’ve never heard of it.”

”You hadn’t heard of me three hours ago, either,” Elias pointed out. ”Yet I just hijacked a David Fincher commercial from a major ad agency.”

She couldn’t argue with that. She had seen it with her own eyes.

”I am offering to be your manager,” Elias proposed, leaning closer, his dark eyes locking onto hers with terrifying intensity. ”I will negotiate your contracts. I will leverage your aesthetic. And tomorrow morning, I will personally walk into the offices of West Coast Talent and legally dismember your contract. I will erase your three-thousand-dollar debt, and I will ensure they never speak your name again.”

Charlize’s breath hitched. Freedom. It was the one thing she wanted more than a hot meal. But she was a survivor. She knew there was always a catch.

”And what’s your price?” she asked, her voice tight. ”You’re a hustler, Elias. You don’t do charity.”

Elias smiled. It was the purest, most unfiltered expression of the Shameless Capitalist System she would ever see.

”Twenty-five percent,” Elias said. ”Standard management commission is ten. Standard agency is twenty. I take twenty-five percent of your gross earnings, across the board. In perpetuity.”

Charlize gasped, physically recoiling. ”Twenty-five percent?! Are you out of your mind? That’s highway robbery! That’s a loan shark rate!”

”It is the predator tax,” Elias said, completely deadpan, refusing to budge a single decimal point. ”Standard agents take twenty percent to wait for the phone to ring. I don’t wait for the phone to ring. I kick the door down and extort the casting directors. The extra five percent is the premium you pay for a manager who is willing to be an absolute sociopath on your behalf.”

Charlize stared at him. She looked at his frayed jeans, the stolen muffin crumbs on his chin, and the cold, terrifying certainty in his eyes. He was pelit. He was ruthless. He was a monster.

But he was the exact kind of monster you wanted fighting on your side of the table.

She looked at her yellow extra voucher, representing the fifty dollars she had traded a day of her life for. Then, she looked back at Elias.

”You break my contract tomorrow,” Charlize said, her voice shaking slightly, not from fear, but from the adrenaline of a massive gamble. ”You get me out of that horrible apartment. And you get me principal auditions.”

”I will put you in rooms you didn’t even know existed,” Elias promised.

Charlize took a deep breath. She extended her hand. ”Twenty-five percent. God help me.”

Elias reached out and gripped her hand. His grip was firm, sealing the pact. The Empress had entered the board. The first pillar of his Hollywood royalty faction was secured, bought and paid for with a mix of financial intimidation and crushed pastries.

”Welcome to Sovereign Media,” Elias said softly.

Deep within his mind, the system rang out, sealing the transaction in digital gold.

[CHA-CHING!]

[SYSTEM NOTIFICATION: TALENT ACQUISITION PROTOCOL SUCCESSFUL.][EVALUATION: YOU SECURED A FUTURE OSCAR WINNER USING A 25% PREDATORY COMMISSION RATE AND A FINANCIAL BLUFF. YOUR SOCIOPATHY IS THE FOUNDATION OF THIS EMPIRE.][REWARD: THE SYSTEM DEDUCTED 10 CP FOR THE X-RAY, BUT IT GRANTS YOU THE SATISFACTION OF TRUE OWNERSHIP.]

Elias stood up, pulling Charlize to her feet. ”Come along, my first client. I believe we have an agency to destroy tomorrow.”