My Alleged Husband

Chapter 1313: Chapter 1142: Shattered

”Now I finally understand that in the course of a marriage, if there is truly no trust between two people, even if they can continue living together, they will not be happy. Their hearts are no longer united, even if they share the same bed yet dream different dreams.

Sometimes, such a marital relationship can eventually drive two people insane; they cannot sustain such a life.

Watching helplessly as the one you love the most, while being unable to have that love and longing, who can truly relate to those who have experienced such feelings? They must have been deeply hurt!”

”I’m not being unreasonable; I’m speaking the truth. You were originally my wife. Just because we’re divorced, does that mean I can’t call you that anymore? What you were saying just now implies that I can’t call you ’wife’ when others are around, but I can call you that when it’s just the two of us, right?” Zhang Zhentian said stubbornly.

”That’s not what I meant. Whether people are around or not, you must not call me your wife anymore because we no longer have any marital relationship. Since there’s no such relationship, we are not a couple legally, and since we’re not a couple, you shouldn’t use such language to address me. It will only lead to misunderstandings, you know? It was you who decided to get a divorce, who pushed me away, who failed to see me as your wife, and who personally ended our marriage of over ten years. Given all this, why regret your decision now? You must face the consequences of your past decisions. The paths you choose are yours alone. If you chose divorce back then, then don’t regret it now. If you’re regretting now, you shouldn’t have chosen to hurt me that way. You hurt me so deeply, and now, what right do you have to say such things to me? Don’t you think it’s hypocritical?”

”Then what do you want me to do? Kneel and beg you to come back to me? For years, I’ve been haunted by nightmares, dreaming repeatedly of us walking out of the registrar’s office. Do you know? Every time I wake up from that nightmare, tears are in my eyes because I can’t let go of you. I personally pushed the woman I loved out of my life, personally ended the marriage I worked so hard to maintain for years. Do you think it doesn’t hurt me too? Just because I don’t express it doesn’t mean I’m not affected!”

”Do you think it means anything to say these things to me now? What’s done is done. Can you turn back time to a few years ago? If you could, then I would promise not to divorce you. But can you do that? You can’t, so let’s not dwell on the past. Let’s just live peacefully apart. I don’t want our relationship to hurt my son any more. I know our divorce was hard for him to accept. Even though I haven’t provided him with any maternal love over these years, he’s always seen me as his real mother. I can’t let him be hurt again because of us; it would make me hate myself even more. We are different. Your thoughts and mine are completely different. You only think of your own interests, but I think of my son, his future wife, and our future grandchild. So, I hope we won’t have any further contact!”

Zhang Zhentian never expected Xia Jing to say such words to him. Was their decade-long marriage really so insignificant to Xia Jing?

”I really want to ask you, was our marriage of more than ten years really nothing in your mind? How can you be so cold and heartless, leaving without a second thought? Where do you place me? What do you see me as?”

”We are now strangers. Why talk about where I place you? You hold no position in my heart now. My heart is only for my son and daughter-in-law. As for you, when you heartlessly divorced me, that was the day I erased you from my heart. You are no longer the love of my life. Despite all we’ve been through, we still couldn’t escape the fate of divorce. This wasn’t just about us but an already predestined outcome. Our personalities were incompatible, yet we rushed to be together. Two incompatible people cannot last long. Especially when, in our marriage, you lost trust in me. A marriage without trust won’t last.”

”We can rebuild trust and recreate our affection. What do I need to do for you to return? Am I truly so unimportant in your heart? Is there no place for me in your heart?”

”That’s right. You no longer have a place in my heart. Whatever you do now, I won’t feel hurt. Even if you fall from a cliff, I won’t panic. Without feelings, there’s simply nothing. No matter what you’ve become, or the consequences you face, I won’t feel uncomfortable because it’s the retribution you deserve for pushing me away. Through our divorce, I’ve learned a significant lesson: If there’s no trust between two people, do not stay together because such a marriage won’t be happy. Like a couple without trust, they’ll live in daily suspicion. Do you think it’s easy for two people to live together only to constantly guess what the other is doing, who they are with, what they did today, or where they went? Isn’t that exhausting? Not just for one, but for both! When you filed for divorce, I was in deep pain. I felt like my world collapsed, almost to the point of wanting to die. But in the end, I realized I can live well without you. I can still be happy because I have my son, daughter-in-law, and future grandchild. But how about you? Are you the same without me? The state of our marriage today is no one’s fault but ours due to a lack of trust. You never trusted me, always suspected me, believed my lies to serve a purpose. But you never understood the real aim behind those lies. So there’s no need to explain it now. Just don’t call me that in public, and let’s not dwell on the past. Let’s cherish what’s left as beautiful memories!”

”My desire for life is modest; I just want to be happy. But now, I’m the most miserable person; my heart is shattered.”