My Alleged Husband

Chapter 1243: Chapter 1072: Never Forget the Hurt

Reflecting on every path I’ve walked, I never imagined I would end up like this one day. Some wounds are perhaps easily forgotten, but others are deeply ingrained, staying with me for a lifetime. I once cared about everything so much, but I never thought that all of this would change the course of my life.

Each person has different thoughts, and they make different decisions. You should know what you really want.

I will never forget everything that has happened.

”Don’t worry, I know that all your money issues with me are because of everything I’ve done to your grandfather. Rest assured, I will sincerely apologize to him. I will make sure he forgives me, and I will dispel all his dissatisfaction and hatred towards me. Until that moment, I hope you can manage not to hate me, your father, anymore. I’ve done nothing wrong in my life, and I don’t want my life to become so complicated and painful. Can you consider things from my perspective?”

I know you don’t actually believe a word I say because I’ve caused you such immense harm. But have you ever thought about why I’ve done all of this? Why have I become like this today? I never thought things would turn out like this. Step by step, I planned carefully, only wanting my family to be happy. Everyone’s initial intention was the same, yet I ended up turning my intention into something I despise the most.

I imagined living the life I envy the most, step by step, but ultimately realized none of it was what I truly wanted. No matter what I do, no matter what I think, I will never obtain everything I desire.

Actually, I’ve never lived my happiest life. I never imagined what I would become with everything I’ve done.

Maybe you think I’m unworthy of being your father; I understand. The harm I inflicted on you is an indelible pain, you know? As a father, I always hope my children can be happy and joyful. Even if I eventually betray everything, I never imagined betraying you. Have you ever thought about it? I never wanted to reach that point. We ended up like that, enduring all the pain again and again.

My child, I sincerely beg you to consider things from my perspective as a father. Reflect on our difficulties, whether our actions were forced and if there were any unavoidable hardships. Don’t judge everyone based solely on your decisive thoughts. I hope that’s not our final outcome, do you understand? Though I’ve been hurt time and again, during my most painful moments, only your mother was beside me. I wanted my family to be with me then, but you weren’t there. You should think from my viewpoint; at that moment, I was actually desperate inside. Wasn’t I lonely, worried, or sad without my family around me?”

When Zhang Yichen heard her father’s words, she could cry and laugh at the same time. She found everything he did today to be so ironic, especially as those words reached her ears. She wished to block her ears with cotton and prevent that voice from entering her mind. She wondered why she felt such deep disgust when hearing her father’s words. Could he be lying again? Haven’t there been enough lies from him in the past?

”Don’t you find saying these things to me now really pointless? As you repeatedly act and arrive at every outcome, have you considered the despair deep in my heart at those moments? My deep sadness? I never planned for how my life should play out; I only know that my family are the people I love the most in my life.”

”Perhaps in your heart of hearts, as a father, I don’t love you as my son. But do you understand that regardless of when or where, we always hold you as our deepest concern? We won’t abandon you without reason. You are the child we gave birth to with great effort. How could we not truly love you? Even if we chose to leave initially, there were unavoidable reasons and hardships. Some things I really can’t clearly explain to you, but I hope you can try to take a step back and understand our unspeakable feelings. Can you?”

”Now you tell me you can’t speak of your hardships, but don’t you remember each mistake you made? Do you really need me to open every wound, mercilessly, again and again, letting everyone experience the pain they bring? How can you be so heartless? I don’t want this now; I simply want us to be happy. It’s best if you can admit mistakes. If you really don’t want to acknowledge your errors, I am helpless. A mouth is attached to your body; I can’t force you to do something you don’t want, just as I can’t hold a knife to your throat to make you do something against your conscience.”

”Dad, Grandpa, aren’t you both old enough not to be arguing in a public hospital setting? I hope you don’t fight here. If you need to, please find a quiet place to argue. The two of you can go back and have a proper conversation, discussing what kind of life you want. Right now, my mother is in the hospital, and I have no inclination to deal with your matters. Understand that as your younger family member, my state of mind now is incredibly tough and painful, alright? People should understand and respect each other, treating others as they would themselves. Only then can each person achieve the results they most desire. If you repeatedly try to force others to make choices and follow your paths using your methods, do you think it’s possible?

No one is perfect, and everyone makes mistakes. I learned this long ago, but I never imagined you would fight over these things today. I’m truly tired. While I’ve suffered pain and torment repeatedly, neither of you stayed with me. Now you choose to fight using these reasons and topics as your justification. Do you think it’s appropriate? Haven’t I ever received my parents’ company and care? I accepted all the hardship alone, transforming into the strongest person possible. I’ve never regretted it, moreover hoping you won’t use these things against me!”

”Mom, Dad, I won’t remember the harm I suffered before; I’m a forgetful person.”

In this world, forgetting is not truly forgetting; it’s choosing this way to let those who love you live happily. It’s merely a benevolent lie, which will ultimately receive a perfect return. Perhaps deep down, everything I’ve done feels flawless, but in others’ eyes, it’s just another excuse again and again...