My Alleged Husband

Chapter 1209: Chapter 1039: The Last Chance

”Mom and Dad, actually, when you finally came back to this home at that moment, you knew as well as anyone that it was truly the last chance. But did you realize? No matter how reluctant your actions were, in your parents’ eyes, at the very last moment, they would still choose to forgive you because, deep down, you are always their child.”

Later, back at the Zhang Family, Zhang Zhentian knew that this was his father and his son, giving him one last chance. He understood, yet he didn’t know what to choose. On one side was his wife, on the other his family. Choosing either side meant abandoning the other, which was the outcome he least wanted to see. If he was forced to make such a decision, no matter what, he wouldn’t be happy or joyful. How could he ensure everyone would look at things from his perspective and consider what kind of result he truly desired? If his repeated wrong decisions led to lifelong regret, making it impossible to forgive himself, wouldn’t that mean he kept making all the wrong choices?

He didn’t want to make a correct decision in his life’s journey so that everyone would look up to him, and he wouldn’t feel so weary. But some things really aren’t that simple. How easy is it to make a decision, and how difficult to make the right decision?

Everyone has a different way of looking at things, different perspectives, and everything he did might bring the most painful ending to himself. Despite this, he had no way to change it, everything only made him feel so anguished, so inadequate.

Xia Jing understood very well what her husband deeply wanted.

Even though she clearly knew, she was powerless. She hoped her husband would stay at home. If she had to leave with her husband, she was powerless to forcibly keep him at home. She would leave quietly on her own.

”During that time, I saw my grandfather living in the most painful state, secretly crying every night. It hurt me so much; I couldn’t forgive those who hurt my grandfather. But in the end, I could only choose to forgive, a forced, helpless decision!”

”Actually, you don’t need to consider my feelings. I know you really want to stay at home. Over the years, you’ve dreamt countless times about returning home. Even if you’ve forgotten, I can’t forget. I’m the one who hurt you, step by step leading to this situation. I’ve made your life so hard. But you know, I can’t bear to see you continue living such a painful life. Even if I’m living alone outside, I’m still your wife. Legally, this will never change, but I hope you can understand.

Now, everyone in this family needs you here. How can we selfishly choose to abandon them just for a bit of personal desire? Leaving before was out of necessity.

But if we choose to leave again now, it proves we don’t regard them as family in our hearts. We don’t want such an ending. Such an ending will only cause us pain. We should use our actions to prove we genuinely want to stay home, genuinely consider them as our family from the depths of our hearts. If we make the wrong decision again, then how do you think we can ever come back to this home? At that time, what face will we have to face our ancestors beneath the earth?

You know, I’ve never asked anything from you all these years. But today, I really want to beg you to make a correct decision, to consider carefully, not to make everyone upset again and again over this matter. Please think about it seriously, stay home, take care of the child and your father. Don’t choose to leave again in a moment of anger, because that’s not the result we want.”

Zhang Zhentian knew his wife would say this to him. He knew how hard his wife had lived over the years. How could he not know? But he never chose to miss out. Maybe saying anything now wouldn’t help, because each word might lead his wife to different thoughts. He didn’t want her to be so tired, nor did he want her to bear others’ gossip. He just wanted her to live pleasantly and freely.

”You’re right. I really want to go back to this house, but the premise is that you have to be here too. If it’s just me, what’s the point?

Please don’t think about pushing me away from you. What happiness do you think I can find away from you? You’re just driving me to a corner, over and over. Please let me live happily too, okay? Allow me to have a bit of autonomous control like a normal person!

I hope I can choose the life I want and the path along it. I don’t want my entire life to rely on you. I just want everyone to know that every decision I make is correct; I can rely on myself to go to the end. I don’t want everyone to look down on me.

Dad, deep in your heart, you understand very well that no matter what, it’s difficult to change my decisions because you know I’m not the type to easily change what I truly want. I’ve walked this far time and time again, yearning for a happy, healthy life, but the results each attempt brought were disappointing.

I admit, back then I hurt you greatly, but it wasn’t intentional. I just hoped to live happily. But each outcome only made you sad. Do you know how regretful I am? None of you could understand the remorse in my heart, the kind of feeling that can crush you, that can corner you into hopelessness.

I really wish I could live freely, even just once, then I’d be content. Over the years, I’ve never lived freely, and you actually understand too; achieving what I’ve now achieved was truly difficult. Everything I did, I achieved step by step through my own efforts. Who truly cares about my inner feelings, who thought about how hard my life was? Nobody understood.

You always think what you believe is good is indeed the best, but you forget whether it’s suitable for me. If such things, such a life, aren’t suitable for my presence, then how do you think I feel? It’s just torture, a deep-seated torture, one that can wear down a person’s will, leading them step by step into a painful abyss without escape. I don’t blame anyone, because all consequences have resulted from my choices. I can only bear them alone, but you should also stand in my shoes to consider my pain, my heartache, and how many tears I’ve shed.”

”Once, everyone gave each other a path, but we should each walk our own path, not always think of changing our life’s direction because of others. In the end, it only makes us very tired, and in their eyes, we might amount to nothing!”