The Roach God

He had two days and a question he could not answer alone, so he did the thing he had been avoiding since the emissary walked out of his gallery:

he went and asked the rat.

It came to the border faster this time.

Four days had become half a morning, and Sacha noticed the change and understood it and did not enjoy what it implied.

You are leaving, the rat sent, before he had finished marking.

Yes.

The machines.

You knew too.

Everyone within two structures knows, the rat sent. You are the only one who had to be told, because you are the only one with nowhere else to be looking. Not unkind. Simply an assessment, delivered by something that had been managing a border for three years while Sacha was learning what an echelon was.

Through the ground, the rat added.

Sacha said nothing, which was an answer, and the rat’s whiskers did something complicated.

I have known about the gaps for two years, it sent. I have never been able to use them. Nothing I have fits. Something in the sending that might have been amusement in a creature better equipped for it. You understand that this is the first time it has been useful to be what you are.

I’m starting to.

Then understand the rest of it quickly, because you are about to make the mistake everyone in your position makes. The rat settled. You are going to arrive in the Mother’s outer ground and offer her the road.

The cricket said arrive with something.

The cricket is long past caring what happens to itself and it gave you honest advice, which is rare and which you should weigh accordingly. A flick of the ears. But it did not say offer her the road. You added that. Think about why.

Because it’s the only thing I have, Sacha sent.

Wrong reason. Try again.

He turned it over out loud, because the rat was plainly not going anywhere until he did. A road gets used once. Second time anyone crosses it, it stops being a secret and starts being a route, and routes get watched.

You could be reading stolen content. Head to NovelPhoenix for the genuine story.

Better. Keep going.

So I don’t sell her the ground. He stopped, hearing the rest of it arrive before he had finished saying the first part. I sell her what only I can keep doing. Not a place. A service.

Now you are asking the right question, the rat sent, which is not ”what do I have” but ”what can I keep having, after she has taken everything she is able to take.”

She could still take it. Six generations of practice at acquiring things.

She could. She has not, from any colony that mattered to her, in longer than either of us has been alive. Its whiskers moved. Ask why, instead of assuming it is mercy.

Sacha made himself answer that one honestly, because it was the part he had been skipping past.

A road under the Mother’s own ground, staffed by her own bred bodies, was a road the Ascension would eventually hear about — a large organisation always leaked, eventually, everything.

A road under a small colony with every reason to keep its own secret was a road that stayed secret precisely because she did not run it.

Her not taking it isn’t kindness, he said slowly. It’s that the thing only works while somebody else is holding it.

Say the whole offer, then. Once, out loud, so I can hear whether you believe it before you carry it to her gate.

I don’t offer her the gaps, Sacha sent. I offer her the only thing in this sector that can carry a message across a corridor two powers have failed to cross in living memory — as a standing arrangement, not a sale — and I make it clear it stops the day she decides to take the ground it runs under.

The rat went quiet long enough that Sacha wondered if he had failed some test whose shape he still didn’t know.

That, it sent finally, is the first thing you have said to me in a month that did not sound like a man rehearsing a speech for someone who is not in the room.

[Divine Creature — Echelon 3 of 9. Progress toward Echelon 4: significant.]

The first movement on that line in longer than he wanted to count, and it had not come from a fight.

He looked at it for a moment.

Not the plan — he had made better plans. Not a victory; there had been no fight in a fortnight.

It was scoring the fact that he had stopped asking what he could survive and started asking what he was for.

Then he put it aside, because there was a colony to move and forty-eight hours to move it in, and somewhere under two hundred lengths of unmapped fracture, eight people who did not yet know that home was being abandoned behind them.

He went to find the Essaim lines and began, in scent and touch and the patient repetition of two months, to explain to sixty-one roaches that everything they had ever known was ending on schedule and that they were going to walk into the dark on purpose.

They took it better than he did.

That was the part he had not prepared for. He had braced for the third chamber all over again — the stillness, the antenna that did not respond — and instead what he got, once the movement grammar was laid and the hold-points marked and the order of the column set, was sixty-one roaches doing exactly what they had been shaped over two months to do:

forming up, without hesitation, on ground they had never seen because the god had marked it.

He had spent a week terrified that he had spent their trust down to nothing.

He had spent some of it.

Not all of it.

And the difference between those two facts was going to have to carry him through however many days of unmapped fracture lay between this cellar and the far side of a war.

Sacha took his position at the head of the column, put his antennae into cold air coming up out of a hole in the world, and gave the first order of the rest of it.