My Alleged Husband

Chapter 842: Chapter 788: An Unexpected Ending

Zhang Zhentian never imagined that his son’s childhood was going to turn out like this. What he saw before was far from the whole picture of how hard his son actually had it—a pain beyond what words can express.

Thinking about all of this, knowing that it was his own selfish actions that caused such harm to his child, why does his heart as a father ache so profoundly? If there was no trace of his son in his heart, why was there a shred of reluctance when he spoke those words today? Could it really be because what she said was so moving?

”Yichen, listen to what your dad has to say. Deep in my heart, it’s not that I don’t care, it’s just that so many years have gone by, and I’ve become numb, not knowing how to be a father. Over the years, I’ve imagined many scenarios of us meeting again. I never thought that one day, I would return to this house, begging on my knees, with the help of you and my grandson. Do you know how that feels for me? I can’t believe, nor accept it, even though I know all that you did was for my sake, for the sake of bringing me back home. But the moment you pleaded for me, I knew I would never be able to repay what I owe you in this lifetime!

My child, isn’t it torture too, to live every day, digging deep into your heart? Have you ever dared to think whether your father would one day return to your side? Because you don’t dare to hope, you’re afraid—afraid that what you long for will only ever be a longing. You can’t bear the heavy blows that reality deals you time and time again, just like me. I’m also afraid, afraid that I will never have another chance at happiness in this life, afraid that I’ve lost the only right to return to this house!

I once silently pondered, if one day I returned to this house, would I come back begging, or by the charity of others? But I never imagined that I would ultimately owe it to my own son and grandson, who helped me from behind the scenes, allowing me to come home. I chose to admit all my mistakes, for that car accident showed me all the wrongs I’ve done in this life within a nightmare. Every act, every moment of yours flashing before me... How could my heart not be tortured? I’m not heartless; I do want to return home, but I’ve lost the right to return time and time again, because all my decisions have made me completely ungrateful!

For my own freedom, I selfishly abandoned my family, my father, my son, and even ignored the century-long reputation of my family, repeatedly doing things that harmed our family’s interests.

Child, I am far inferior to you. Although you may think my life experiences are rich, do you think I’m happy? So many things have turned out in ways we never expected, haven’t they?

If one day you’ve wandered for many years, constantly roaming, wouldn’t you want to return home, to be by your father’s side, by your son’s side? Even if over these years you had the woman you cherished the most by your side, your heart would still be empty because you lack the greetings and care from your family. You heartlessly left them behind, but they’re at home, foolishly waiting in vain for you to return, eagerly hoping every moment. Can you imagine how heartbreaking it is to see in your dreams the silhouette of your family waiting for you at the door?

At this moment, Zhang Yichen doesn’t know what to say to his father.

He knows his father has always wanted to come back home, and as a son, this is as far as he can help. He also understands how much his father has sacrificed over the years, but some things can’t just be let go of so easily. The companionship that’s been missing for so many years will always remain just a longing deep in his heart. Even now that everything has returned, the joy of childhood that was missed can never be compensated for.

”Dad, actually, I can imagine that feeling of knowing your family is eagerly waiting for you to come home, yet not having the courage to return, only to stand in a dream, in that distant place, watching your family hopelessly looking out for you. That feeling is truly agonizing; I can empathize with it!”

”Because that’s how I’ve spent these years, constantly waiting in vain for my parents to return to my side. Do you understand this longing gaze of mine? How much I wish you could come back, just to see your son? I only wish my parents would put forth the last bit of effort to come back and accompany me. Even if it were only for one day, one moment, or even a second, that for me would be the entirety of happiness. I’ve never had your company, and I don’t even know what it’s like to have my parents by my side. I’ve even forgotten that I have parents!”

Perhaps saying this makes you very upset, and hearing it disappoints you, but some things are just this cruel. I have no way to undo everything as if it never happened. You are my father, and you know that some things are truly hard to forget. Just like how I shut you out before, again and again, you wanted so badly to come home, and yet I only hurt you. Does your heart truly feel happy then? You’ll never forget the pain your own son caused you, will you?”

”You’re right, I can’t forget, and deep inside I’m fully aware that it’s all my own fault. By choosing to come back in this manner, I have to accept the same looks from you all over and over again. There’s nothing I can do; no one could have expected how things would end up. An ending that’s too perfect is unbelievable, but perhaps our current one is the most correct, isn’t it?”