Livestream Conflict-solver: The Whole Internet Begs Me for Justice!

16: We must learn from the master’s skillsAfter Zhang Ze turned off the livestream, the internet fully woke up.

His comment, ”Coming to seek guidance,” was like a depth charge, stirring up a storm in Master Lei’s comment section.

The ID, Brother Pingshi, is now synonymous with ”justice” and ”toughness” on the Note platform.

Within a few minutes, his comment was pushed to the top hot comment by the Ze Family Army and curious onlookers who rushed to the scene, with likes skyrocketing into the tens of thousands.

”Hahahaha, the main character is attacking directly! Master, will you accept the challenge?”

”Master Lei: I just wanted to piggyback on the hype, but you want to cripple me?”

”Don’t be silly, Master Lei has forty years of cultivation, he could blow Brother Pingshi away with a single breath of immortal energy, how could he not dare to accept?”

”The one in front, which ’blow away’ are you referring to? (dog head)”

The entire comment section, from initial doubts about Lei Long, instantly turned into unanimous mockery and calls for a fight... Meanwhile, in a rented ”martial arts hall” in the suburbs.

”Headmaster” Lei Long stared at his phone screen, his face turning from white to green, then to purple, his hand holding the phone trembling slightly.

”Too much! Too much!” Lei Long angrily threw his phone onto the carpeted floor, ”This kid! He doesn’t play by the rules! How dare he?!”

A tall, thin man next to him, wearing a similar training uniform but looking more like his assistant, quickly picked up the phone and came over, saying, ”Master, don’t get angry, don’t get angry. This kid is just a hothead, he doesn’t understand what ’martial virtue’ is, he just wants to humiliate you with violence!”

Lei Long slumped into the grandmaster’s chair, panting heavily, no longer showing any of the ethereal, immortal-like demeanor from the video.

What forty years of cultivation! He was only forty-five this year, did he start practicing at five years old?

He used to be a tea reseller, but his business failed. Seeing the recent popularity of traditional Chinese culture and martial arts, he rented a place, bought some gear, and transformed himself into the ”Headmaster of the Hunyuan Xingyi Tai Chi Sect.” With his eloquent tongue, he managed to fool a few wealthy bosses, and his life had been quite comfortable.

Exposing Brother Pingshi was originally a carefully planned move.

Brother Pingshi had high popularity and was highly controversial.

By stepping forward as a ”traditional martial arts master” and using ambiguous terms like ”script” and ”hype” to criticize, he could appear to have sharp insight while also gaining a huge wave of traffic.

According to his script, Brother Pingshi would either play dead and not respond, in which case he would win; or he would furiously argue online, which would further solidify the image of Brother Pingshi as ”lacking martial virtue and being impetuous,” and he would still win.

But he calculated everything, except for the fact that Zhang Ze was a stubborn kid who said nothing and directly challenged him offline, and even wanted to livestream the whole thing!

Is this even a challenge?

A real fight? Don’t be ridiculous.

His meager martial arts skills were fine for dealing with Old Grandfathers exercising in the park, but fighting a ruthless person who could twist someone’s arm off in one move, as seen in the video?

He was afraid he would be twisted into a pretzel on the spot.

”Master, what do we do now? Everyone online is waiting for your response!” The assistant was sweating profusely, ”How about... we just say he’s not qualified and not bother with him?”

”Nonsense!” Lei Long glared at him, ”The whole internet is watching now. If I back down, the sign of my ’Hunyuan Xingyi Tai Chi Sect’ will be torn down tomorrow!”

Lei Long paced back and forth in the room, his mind racing.

Fighting was definitely not an option.

Hiding was also definitely not an option.

Then... he could only turn this ”fight” into something that wasn’t a ”fight”!

Lei Long’s eyes suddenly lit up, and he slapped his thigh: ”I’ve got it!”

He snatched his phone, took a deep breath, and his face once again adopted that profound and inscrutable ”master” demeanor, then he started recording a video.

”Ahem.” He cleared his throat and, facing the camera, said with a benevolent expression, ”Young people are impulsive, which is normal. Brother Pingshi’s willingness to come and seek guidance shows that he still has a heart for martial arts, and this old man is very pleased.”

”But,” he changed his tone, his expression becoming extremely serious, ”My Chinese martial arts are profound and extensive, emphasizing ’stopping conflict to achieve martial arts,’ which is about martial virtue, not the violent tendencies of street brawling! In order to let the vast number of netizens, and also this young man, understand what true kung fu is, this old man is willing to give him an opportunity.”

”This Saturday at ten in the morning, right here in my Wude Hall, I will accept Brother Pingshi’s ’guidance.’ But we will not be competing in martial arts, but rather ’exchanging pointers’! We will demonstrate, in a ’touch-and-stop’ manner, what ’using a small force to move a great weight’ means, and what ’overcoming hardness with softness’ means. It will be livestreamed throughout, to show everyone that true traditional martial arts are art, philosophy, not crude violence!”

These words were spoken with such grandiosity and righteousness.

Especially when he said, ”I accept Brother Pingshi’s guidance” and ”true traditional martial arts are art,” he almost believed it himself.

As soon as the video was released, it immediately ignited the internet again.

Zhang Ze had just washed an apple and hadn’t taken two bites when his phone received countless @ mentions.

He clicked on Master Lei’s new video, watched half of it, and almost spat out the apple in his mouth.

Good heavens! This old fox, he’s truly a talent!

”Touch-and-stop?” Zhang Ze chuckled, ”This old swindler wants to turn a fight into a duet?”

He’s probably trying to play ’you pat one, I pat one’ with me, isn’t he?”

Just as Lei Long said ”touch-and-stop” and ”demonstrate using a small force to move a great weight,” Zhang Ze felt two clear and sharp stings in his temples.

Lies! And carefully woven, unconvincing lies!

Zhang Ze’s fans were also dumbfounded.

”Damn it! I took off my pants, and you show me this? Touch-and-stop? My arguments with my girlfriend are more intense than this!”

”I’m dying of laughter, this old man is really scared! He even changed the rules!”

”Brother Ze, don’t fall for it! This old swindler just wants to trick you into coming, then play Tai Chi push hands with you, and finally declare you lost, saying you don’t understand ’inner strength’!”

”Exactly! This bastard is very cunning! He’ll just touch you casually and say you were injured by his internal energy, and you’ll have no one to complain to!”

Watching his fans’ analyses, Zhang Ze smiled even more happily.

This is exactly what he wanted.

If Lei Long had just chickened out, that would have been boring.

Now that he had cleverly set up such a flawed ”trap,” that’s when it became fun.

Zhang Ze picked up his phone again and, in front of everyone, left a new comment under Lei Long’s new video.

Brother Pingshi: ”Junior has learned a lot! Master Lei is indeed a respected elder, and his words have enlightened this junior! Violence truly cannot solve problems, it was junior who was too fixated on appearances. ’Touch-and-stop,’ this realm is too profound, junior yearns for it! This Saturday at ten in the morning, junior will definitely arrive on time, bathe and burn incense, listen attentively, and properly experience your ’art’ and ’philosophy,’ Master! See you there!”

This flawless, even somewhat ”pious” reply, directly blocked all avenues of retreat.

Now, Lei Long had no more excuses.

And the entire internet of onlookers was completely hyped up.

One wanted to turn a fight into a dance, and the other insisted on dancing with him.

Everyone knew that this ”philosophical discussion” on Saturday morning would definitely be more exciting than any boxing match!