My Alleged Husband

Chapter 1126: Chapter 976 Acting

Everyone has their own way of life; this is the difference, and ultimately the outcomes are different too. One should never think of following in someone else’s footsteps, living someone else’s life. Even if you can act, even if your acting is very realistic, you can never perform someone else’s life.

”Nai’er, there are some things I need to tell you in advance. Never think about choosing to date while you’re studying and growing; that will bring you pain. Don’t think that dating is always a happy thing; indeed, some relationships are exhausting. You may give everything to a woman, yet deep down, the person she truly loves is not you. Even if one day she deceitfully tells you, ’You are the one I love,’ who knows what she will do behind your back? Just like many girls who truly love a boy, willing to sacrifice anything for him, but in the end, what do they get? That boy has an affair outside. Do you think this is a life a normal person should live? No one wants to live in such darkness for their entire life. This kind of life is suffocating, it is painfully unbearable!”

”Why are you suddenly telling me these things? You don’t think I’m in a relationship, do you? Then you’re overthinking. All that I do is just to hope I can grow up happy and cheerful; I speak with a clear conscience. Don’t let your imagination run wild. I’m not going to bury myself in a grave at such a young age. I know how scary love can be, especially dating.”

Zhang Yichen couldn’t understand why his son would say something like this. Could it be that his son already had a relationship that he hadn’t told them about? But he also didn’t want to believe that his son at such a young age could do something so groundbreaking. He believed his son wasn’t that kind of person, yet everyone curiously looked at him, waiting for every word he was about to say.

”You really don’t need to worry that I will have a relationship during my growth or learning phase. I’ve seen everything you’ve mentioned, I’ve seen a boy love a girl deeply, only for that girl to hurt him. By the time the girl realized her mistake, the boy chose to keep a mistress outside. You know, such situations appear too often. When I saw this scene, I couldn’t determine right from wrong. I am afraid that one day the woman I love deeply could just be pretending in front of me, that every word she says is just to pacify me. That is truly terrifying. I don’t have the capacity, nor the ability to endure such turmoil.

I just want to live a peaceful and stable life, to live happily, freely, and unrestrainedly. If I spend my whole life following others, even if I reach the end of my life, would I still be myself? Would that still be the real me? I just want to be my true self, to show my real self to everyone, not to deceive everyone with my disguise, nor to take advantage of their sympathy, their kindness towards my age. I cannot use these things to hurt anyone. That is not something I should do. All I hope for is to live happily and stably. Seeing my grandparents like this, seeing my parents like this, I am even more afraid of marriage.

Grandpa and Grandma, you three should be very clear that some things cannot be explained with any reason. I had never experienced such feelings before, but now I know what this feeling is like. Behind repeated disappointments is always the hope I once brought. Hope is always given by others, but each time I watch the one I love most stand in someone else’s arms, I understand that kind of feeling. Have any of you truly considered what you once wanted most? Is it really just to live a happy and joyful life? But actually, it is not.

Many people nowadays are merely together just to cope with others, to spite the one they genuinely like who doesn’t confess their feelings. I don’t want to be the one intervening in others’ relationships, let alone be labeled as a mistress by others. Who among you knows how deeply I despise seeing mistresses disrupt others’ relationships? I don’t understand why those women do such things. Is it truly that joyful to be in someone else’s bed? To stir up and disrupt others’ happiness? Is that really what they want?

At one point, I thought that person was content to be someone else’s mistress for a lifetime. In her eyes, maybe being a mistress was merely a refreshing term. Perhaps she was suited only for being a mistress her whole life. She’s been in so many beds, engaging in things with so many people. No one knows what she’s truly like. Who knows whether she is clean or dirty? Ultimately, such people are the dirtiest because no one knows their past.

You might not believe it, but when everything piles onto one person, and when all difficulties repeatedly appear before them that they can’t solve, their mood is agitated. But facing their family, they can only maintain a calm mind. They can’t have their family bear the pain and trials they deserve.

I’ve seen so many families that were originally happy, now ruined by mistresses; in each family, people turned into something neither human nor ghost. Their happy family became devoid of any humanity, just a collection of rotten nests. You know that feeling is truly disheartening. I am also afraid. I’m afraid that one day I’ll face such a scenario. I cannot assert that I’ll live my life easily, nor can I be sure that I can live simply and freely. But at least I’ll earnestly pursue my desires, do what I want most in this lifetime, and put in the effort, even if the result is not what I wanted. But I will still have no regrets. To strive is the best action, and action is the best proof. If I can’t even muster the courage to pursue what I want, then I have lived in vain. I will never trust the deceitful words of those women. She may be with you today, but tomorrow, she might sneak into someone else’s bed. I hope such things never happen to me, and all I hope for is to live my life peacefully...”