My Alleged Husband

Chapter 989: Chapter 882: Can’t Figure It Out

Zhang Ni actually knows what her father truly thinks deep down. Over the years, the reason she has chosen not to say anything is simply to leave a way out for everyone involved, allowing each person to carefully consider how to walk this path and what actions to take so that no one is saddened by the decisions made due to their achievements. Time and again, he has become different from before. As time passed, along with the family arguments, he has matured a lot. He feels that to survive in this world, the family must be harmonious, and everyone must unite. If issues are resolved solely through force every time, even if he continues to live here, the only result for the family would be sadness and pain.

Zhang Yichen doesn’t understand what goes on in his son’s mind. He doesn’t understand what his son truly thinks deep down. All he knows is that he has fulfilled his responsibilities as a father and has told his child everything that should be said. Whether his child chooses to listen in the end depends on whether the child decides to follow this path.

”Dad, deep down, you understand better than anyone else, don’t you? You see more clearly than anyone, yet you’ve chosen to remain silent because you don’t want the family relations to deteriorate further. Do you know that because of your current thoughts and actions, every family member views things differently and is conflicted because of what you do?

No one wants to live in constant pain. Everyone wishes for a happy and carefree life. Is it really a fact that we can live without restraints? Can this truly become a reality? Who can really achieve that? Every time people want to do something, it’s just so painful and sad. No one ever thinks about what I should actually do. What do I achieve by having all this?

For a trivial matter back then, I went along with you, and it was only until now that I realized how absurd my actions were. Why did I argue with you over those things, and why did I make you feel hurt deep inside?

I don’t know if what I’ve done is wrong; I just want things to be different from before. I just want every family member to live well and freely, living the life they most desire. But why is it that no matter how I try, I can’t make every family member live according to my wishes? Is what I’ve done meaningless? Is just one decision really that significant? Mom, why in your eyes is it a joke that I want to walk my own path? I want to explore the world on my efforts. For you, it’s just a joke, a joke, and you never take my words seriously.

What I’ve done has gradually achieved my desired goals, but in the end, I found that the outcome contradicts my original intentions and is no longer the ending I once desired most. I have no way to control it, which makes me feel that my abilities are really limited. I can’t manage my own life well, and instead, I’ve made a mess of it.”

”Child, let’s not talk about these matters between us now. Shouldn’t we, father and son, get along harmoniously? Why argue over these issues? Our top priority now is to have your grandparents come back quickly, to accompany your mother well, and help her return to normal soon so she can lead a normal life in the future. Don’t let her remain confused and sometimes manic, sometimes lucid every day. This is also painful for her deep down, isn’t it?

You know well how proud your mother is. Once she makes a decision, she won’t let anyone easily change it. But now she can only lie here, confined in a small space. If her mind were clear, do you think she would be happy? Would she think this is the life she wants most? She would only see it as a great humiliation, a burden she’s brought upon us that drags us down.”

”I don’t want to be entangled in these problems anymore. I hope you go back and persuade grandpa and grandma, help them think clearly about what they truly want. If their child fulfills them, I want to live freely as before, living the life I most desire. Then in the future, no one in this house will truly welcome them back with open arms. Their return will only bring too much upheaval to the family, again and again, not giving us a chance to react. I don’t want this kind of life to continue like this. I hope they can carefully consider what result they want most in their life. What does every decision they make treat us as?”

Zhang Zhentian stood there, listening to the conversation between his son and grandson. He didn’t expect that they would still consider what he, as an elder, had done over the years, how many he owed. but now that he’s finally back home, why does he hurt them again and again in the same way? Why does he betray their trust and throw all their efforts to waste with his actions? What is he doing all this for, hurting them so much? Can he truly live with himself deep down? Can he really not feel any guilt?

In truth, he is also very tormented deep down, but when these things present themselves, he doesn’t know what kind of choice he should make. His greatest wish is just for everyone to live happily, but he can never achieve his most desired outcome in the end.

He is also torn and troubled inside. He hopes for happiness for everyone, but his presence has made this once harmonious family unbearable as it is now.

No matter what, he cannot understand where he went wrong.