My Alleged Husband

Chapter 972: Chapter 865: The Conclusion

Zhang Yichen had never seen his grandfather so out of sorts like today. Perhaps all the grievances buried deep within his heart over the years could finally be unleashed on this day. No matter what, he could clearly remember his grandfather often holding a photo, silently shedding tears. Alone, he would often hold that photo and mutter to himself. He locked himself away in a solitary space; when outside, he was always so bright and lovable. He never burdened anyone with his negative energy and only wished to bring happiness to others. But behind closed doors, how much pain did he endure alone, which I never considered.

Sometimes I wonder, if I had shown just a little more concern for my grandfather, would the outcome have been different? How difficult have these years been for him, which I have witnessed time and again? How much did he sacrifice for me, yet what did I truly give in return? I couldn’t even offer him a basic bit of joy.

If I could go back in time, would I reflect on what kind of life I should give my grandfather? How should I confront him? Over these years, how much pain and sorrow has he suffered? No one knows that he has kept all his deepest anguishes to himself, while I have let mine flow out freely. My grandfather has silently endured so much, and yet, what have I done?

”Dad, no matter what, I don’t want you to speak more harsh words to Grandpa. He is really old now and can no longer bear the betrayal and hurt brought repeatedly by his family. Could you not show a bit of understanding for him, even just a little filial piety? I would be grateful to you. Have you ever thought about how many you’ve hurt with each action you’ve taken? Have you considered the grudges you’ve amassed? You always think your actions are right, but are they truly correct? Ask yourself, have the past years been unfair to you? Since the day you were born, has Grandpa ever treated you poorly? Has he not given you a life of luxury and ensured you never lacked anything? Even without a mother, haven’t you felt that Grandpa has bestowed all his love on you?

His heart feels guilty, which is why he has given you all the love he had for his wife. But in the end, all his expectations for you fell through. You chose to leave, to wander in distant foreign lands rather than staying by his side. Does his heart not hurt from this? Doesn’t he feel despair?

Your actions have never considered his feelings; how could he then stand in your shoes to understand you? Human nature is to empathize. If you cannot treat others as family, don’t expect them to forgive your every mistake. He owes you nothing.

If you returned to this family only to hurt your father repeatedly, hurt me, hurt everyone in the family, then congratulations, you’ve achieved your goal, you’ve gotten what you wished for. But I beg you, please, let Grandpa go. No matter how you hurt me, I can let it go. I can pretend nothing ever happened; I can see it all as my own doing, but Grandpa doesn’t owe you anything.”

”Why do you still put all the blame on me? Have I truly done everything wrong? Is what I desire not what you all want? Why do you always selfishly believe that your views are entirely different from others and thus correct?

I never intended to return to this family to get back at you for shutting me out. I sincerely desired to come back and be by your side. The final result caught me off guard. I had no way to control how this conclusion hurt me. I begged repeatedly for you to let me stay. In the end, what did I get? Nothing at all. All the pain came back to me.

You might think I’m truly selfish for never considering things from your perspective. But do you understand? If it weren’t for considering things from your viewpoint and taking care of rent, how could I possibly put these things aside and not speak these words to you? How could I keep holding you all deep in my heart?

You are my family, a fact that can never be changed. Everything I did was in hopes that the family could be happy. I longed for each one to be joyful and at peace. But in the end, all my hopes were dashed. Does my heart never feel disappointed, never feel pain, never feel despair?

You always think I have imposed all the suffering onto you, but have you not also put your pain on me? Have the damages and pain I have endured over these years been small? Can you say everything you’ve done contained no trace of selfishness? Don’t judge others using your own thoughts; perhaps what you do isn’t always right. Acting this way only wrongs others time and again, driving away those who love you most.

Even if deep inside you don’t want me to leave, why do you treat me this way? Again and again, you just get some harm and pain. You’ve gained nothing. You’ve burdened yourselves. You think you’ve done the right thing, but in the end, you’ll find out that everything you did was wrong because your actions have hurt every family member beside you.

No matter what, today I wish to make it clear to you. I never intended to harm you. Perhaps the ways I acted brought harm without me realizing. I didn’t mean it; I never intended it. But repeatedly, inexplicable mistakes happened, causing these outcomes, these consequences. Does my heart truly not carry regret?”