The Captain's Dirty Little Secret

Chapter 400: Chapter 400 - Graduation

Graduation morning started with Zac sitting on the edge of Roxie’s bed while she stood between his knees fixing the tie he had already managed to ruin three times.

”I still think I had it right the first time,” he said, watching her fingers work the knot.

”You had one side hanging near your stomach.”

”It was a style.”

”It was ugly.”

Zac laughed while Roxie tightened the knot and pushed it carefully toward his collar. He was already dressed except for his graduation gown, his white shirt tucked properly into his pants and his hair actually fixed instead of left however it dried after a shower. Roxie had spent most of the morning on herself, fixing her hair twice and taking far longer than she wanted to admit getting her lipstick perfectly even, so she appreciated that at least one of them looked ready.

She flattened his collar and moved the tie slightly to the left before leaning closer to inspect it. ”There. Finally.”

Zac barely looked at the tie. His attention had been on her mouth for the last thirty seconds, and Roxie recognized the expression before he even leaned forward. She immediately pressed one hand against his chest.

”No.”

His brows pulled together. ”No?”

”You are not kissing me. I spent forever getting my lips right.”

”So graduation means I lose kissing privileges?”

”It means you wait until after pictures.”

”That’s hours.”

”You’ll survive.”

He leaned toward her again anyway, and Roxie laughed while moving her face out of reach. Zac followed, which only made her laugh harder as she pushed against his chest again.

”One kiss,” he said.

”You always say one.”

”Because one sounds reasonable.”

Roxie stared at him while he gave her the most ridiculous disappointed look she had seen all morning. His mouth actually turned down slightly, and she narrowed her eyes.

”Are you pouting?”

”No.”

”You are.”

”I’m being denied affection on graduation day.”

”You woke up beside me.”

”That was before graduation officially started.”

Roxie shook her head, but he kept staring at her mouth until she finally gave in. She caught his face between both hands and pressed the quickest peck she could manage against his lips before pulling away.

”There. Happy?”

His smile appeared immediately.

Roxie was about to step back when she noticed the red stain left across his lower lip. She stared at it for half a second before laughing.

Zac frowned. ”What?”

”Your mouth.”

His expression changed immediately, and he reached up, but Roxie caught his hand before he could touch it.

”You’ll make it worse.”

”You did this.”

”You begged for the kiss.”

”I didn’t ask you to paint me.”

Roxie laughed as she rubbed her thumb carefully over his lower lip. The lipstick smeared slightly instead of disappearing, which made her laugh again while Zac watched her with increasing suspicion.

”What?”

”Nothing. Hold still.”

”You’re enjoying this.”

”A little.”

”A lot.”

Roxie smiled because he was right. There was something stupidly satisfying about seeing her lipstick on Zac’s mouth, especially when he was dressed so neatly for graduation and currently sitting there letting her clean up the evidence.

Zac caught the look on her face. ”You like seeing your mark on me.”

Roxie laughed. ”It’s lipstick.”

”Still yours.”

”Possessive much?”

”You’re the one admiring it.”

She had no answer for that because she was.

”Maybe I am.”

Zac smiled and reached for her waist again, trying to pull her closer.

Roxie immediately pushed against his shoulders. ”Absolutely not. You already got your kiss.”

”That barely counted.”

”It counted enough that I’m cleaning my lipstick off your face.”

He pouted again, and Roxie laughed before reaching for a tissue from the dresser. She dampened the edge with a little water from the glass beside her makeup and wiped the remaining red from his mouth while Zac sat there looking completely unimpressed with the situation.

”There. Clean.”

”You ruined it.”

”You were complaining two seconds ago.”

”I changed my mind.”

Roxie rolled her eyes and tossed the tissue into the trash. ”Too late.”

Zac stood and came up behind her while she checked her own lipstick in the mirror. Thankfully the quick peck had barely disturbed it. His arms slipped around her waist, and Roxie let herself settle against him as she looked at their reflections.

Their graduation gowns hung side by side from the closet door behind them.

”This feels weird,” she said. ”We’re actually graduating.”

Zac grinned. ”Doesn’t it? With your temper, it’s a wonder.”

Roxie looked at him through the mirror. ”You wanna feel that temper right now?”

Zac laughed and rocked her slightly in his arms. ”Just kidding.”

She turned around and leaned back against the dresser, looking at him properly. Four years of Briarwick had somehow reached this morning. All the football games, cheer competitions, fights, rumors, suspensions, stupid decisions and moments that had felt like the end of the world had eventually led to a tie she had fixed for Zac and two graduation gowns hanging beside each other in her bedroom.

”We actually survived high school.”

”You say that like Briarwick was war.”

”You dated me. You know better.”

”That’s fair.”

Roxie laughed, but as she looked around the bungalow something quieter settled underneath the excitement.

Claire should have seen this.

Roxie let herself think it without trying to push away the ache that came with it. Her mother should have been somewhere inside the bungalow that morning, probably complaining about how much graduation cost, telling Roxie she spent too long on her makeup, then taking fifty terrible pictures anyway.

Sometimes Roxie wondered what Claire would actually have done. Would she have been proud that Roxie finished high school mostly through her own effort, or would she have found some way to make it seem smaller than it was?

Sometimes Roxie forgot what Claire had really been like because the memories she held onto hardest were the moments when Claire had actually acted like her mother. The sober days. The better days. The rare moments when Roxie had been able to believe Claire would stay that version of herself.

Today she decided she was allowed to remember that Claire, the sober mother who would have been happy for her daughter and watched Roxie put on her graduation gown knowing she had made it.

Roxie was graduating at last.

”Come on. We need to go.”

Zac released her and turned toward the dresser to grab his phone, and Roxie looked at him before suddenly remembering something else.

The Prescotts.

Zac was graduating without his family.

Her happiness dipped slightly as she watched him check his phone like there was nothing unusual about the morning. She knew the guilt was ridiculous. Zac had chosen to walk away from his parents before Roxie ever asked him to choose anything, and everything that happened afterward had been his decision too.

Still, it affected her.

Her father would be at graduation. Cynthia and Jayson would be there. Karen had both of her parents coming after everything that happened.

Zac had nobody from his own family waiting in the stands.

He noticed her looking. ”What?”

Roxie shook her head and reached for her gown. ”Nothing. Let’s go.”

Briarwick’s stadium was already packed when they arrived. Cars lined both sides of the road while families streamed toward the bleachers carrying flowers, balloons and phones already raised for pictures. Rows of chairs covered the field for the graduating seniors, teachers were trying to organize everyone near the track, and students in gowns kept breaking away from their assigned areas every time they spotted another friend they needed a picture with.

Roxie barely made it through the entrance before she spotted Karen with her mother fixing the front of her gown.

Karen saw Roxie and immediately looked like rescue had arrived. ”Help me.”

Roxie laughed.

Karen looked much better than she had when she first returned to school. Some color had returned to her face, although Roxie could still see the tiredness around her eyes when she looked carefully. Her mother apparently noticed everything because she kept straightening Karen’s gown while Karen repeatedly tried moving her hands away.

”Mom, I can fix it.”

”It’s twisted.”

”It was fine.”

”It wasn’t.”

Karen noticed Zac beside Roxie and pointed toward him. ”Tell her.”

Zac looked at Karen’s mother before looking back at Karen. ”I’m staying out of this.”

”Coward.”

Angela came up behind them already wearing her gown and carrying her cap under one arm. ”She’s been doing this for twenty minutes.”

Karen turned toward her. ”You were supposed to help.”

”I did. I told you to surrender.”

Karen’s father was there too, standing several feet away near the bleachers. He had arrived separately from her mother, but both of them had come, and Roxie noticed Karen glance toward him several times without saying anything.

Whatever was happening inside Karen’s family was still messy. Her mother had stayed with her since the hospital, her father had started showing up again, and neither relationship had suddenly become perfect. Still, both of them were here to watch her graduate.

Karen’s mother raised the phone again before any of them could escape, and they ended up taking several more pictures, most of them with Karen complaining, Angela laughing and Roxie deliberately ruining the last one just to irritate her.

They had barely finished when Kendall walked over, looked Roxie up and down and frowned.

”Are you stupid? Your cap is crooked.”

”It’s fine. You’re stupid.”

Kendall stared at her. ”Is that a comeback? My three year old brother could do better than that.”

”Shut up.”

Kendall clicked her tongue and fixed Roxie’s cap herself before stepping back to inspect it.

Roxie chuckled.

Kendall immediately narrowed her eyes. ”What?”

”You’re going to miss me.”

”No.”

”You are.”

”I’m going to sleep better.”

Roxie laughed. ”Sure.”

Kendall rolled her eyes, but Roxie caught the smallest movement at the corner of her mouth before she turned away.

”Thanks, co captain.”

Kendall looked over her shoulder. ”Your gown is wrinkled too.”

Roxie laughed as she walked away.

That was probably the closest either of them was getting to an emotional goodbye.

Coach Miller appeared a few minutes later and called the graduating cheerleaders over before any of them could scatter again.

”Jones. Kendall. Tori. Marissa. Karen. Angela. Over here.”

Karen immediately looked toward Roxie. ”That sounded threatening.”

”He always sounds threatening.”

Coach Miller heard them. ”I can also leave you out of the picture.”

”You wouldn’t dare,” Karen said.

”I’m starting to consider it.”

The six of them gathered near the edge of the field while Coach Miller directed them into place. Roxie and Kendall stood together in the center, with Tori and Marissa beside them and Karen and Angela squeezing in close enough that Coach Miller immediately complained they were making his job harder on purpose.

Once everyone was finally where he wanted them, someone nearby offered to take the phone so Coach Miller could join them.

He stepped into the group but paused before the picture was taken.

Roxie noticed the change in his face first.

Coach Miller looked over the six of them slowly.

Kendall.

Tori.

Marissa.

Angela.

Karen.

Then Roxie.

For once he wasn’t yelling about counts, posture, practice attendance or somebody talking when they were supposed to be listening.

”You six have made the last few years incredibly exhausting.”

Karen smiled. ”That sounds more like you.”

Coach Miller ignored her, but his mouth twitched. ”You argued with me, ignored instructions, made decisions that probably took years off my life, and somehow still managed to give this school its first national championship.”

Angela smiled. ”You’re welcome.”

Tori laughed.

Coach Miller shook his head before looking at all of them again, and this time his voice softened. ”I’m proud of you. All of you. Whatever happens after today, you earned what you did here. Nobody gets to take that away from you.”

The joking quieted.

Roxie felt something tighten in her chest.

Coach Miller’s eyes moved toward Karen for a moment before returning to the entire group. ”Take care of yourselves. And call if you need something. Graduating means I’m no longer your coach. It does not mean I suddenly forget who you are.”

Karen’s expression shifted immediately.

”Oh, fuck you.”

Coach Miller frowned. ”Excuse me?”

”You did the caring thing again.”

Angela laughed while wiping under one eye.

Coach Miller looked increasingly uncomfortable now that all six girls were staring at him.

Marissa smiled. ”Are you crying?”

”I am not crying.”

Tori leaned closer. ”Your eyes are red.”

Coach Miller sighed. ”Can we take the picture before I change my mind about all of you?”

Karen pointed toward him. ”He’s definitely crying.”

”I can still make you run.”

That broke everyone.

Roxie started laughing while Kendall shook her head, Angela leaned against Karen and even Coach Miller finally laughed as the person holding the phone told them to look toward the camera.

The picture caught all seven of them smiling.

Afterward, Coach Miller looked at the six graduating cheerleaders one more time before shaking his head.

”Go sit down before somebody has to come looking for you.”

”Yes, Coach,” Roxie said.

Karen immediately added, ”Last time we ever have to say that.”

Coach Miller pointed toward the track. ”Karen.”

Karen laughed and started walking away.

Roxie followed with the others, still smiling. She didn’t need a separate goodbye with Coach Miller after that. Everything she would have wanted to say had already been inside that picture, the championship they won together and the years he spent making sure none of them ever felt completely alone.

As they crossed the field toward the graduates’ chairs, Roxie looked up at the bleachers.

Her father, Cynthia and Jayson were somewhere in the crowd.

She searched until she finally found them.

Her father saw her first and raised his hand. Cynthia immediately started waving with both hands while Jayson lifted his phone like he had already been waiting for her to look over.

Roxie smiled and waved back.

They were here.

The Robinsons.

Her family, in whatever complicated shape that word had taken.

More pictures followed before the teachers finally started forcing everyone into their assigned seats. Roxie took pictures with Karen and Angela, then with Zac, the football guys and the other cheerleaders. Everyone seemed determined to document every possible combination before graduation officially began.

Eventually the teachers won.

Roxie sat down among rows of blue gowns while the stadium continued buzzing around them. Karen and Angela were nearby, Zac and the boys were several rows away, and every few seconds somebody still turned around because a parent was shouting their name from the bleachers.

Roxie looked around once more before the program began.

The field where they had cheered through football games was now covered with chairs for their graduating class. The bleachers were packed with people who had watched them grow up, screw up, win, lose and somehow make it here.

Somewhere in that crowd sat her father, Cynthia and Jayson.

Karen’s parents were there.

Coach Miller stood off to the side with the faculty.

And beside Roxie were the people who had turned Briarwick into far more than the place she once couldn’t wait to escape.

The music lowered as the remaining families settled into their seats and conversations around the stadium slowly quieted.

The graduation program began.