The Captain's Dirty Little Secret

Chapter 369: Chapter 369 - Friends Are Forever

Saturday somehow ended with all three of them spread across Angela’s bed.

Karen had claimed the pillows against the headboard, Angela was lying across the middle with her hair everywhere, and Roxie had taken the other side with her phone resting against her stomach.

Karen looked around the room and sighed. ”I still like hanging out here better.”

Angela turned her head. ”Why?”

”Your bed is fucking huge.”

Roxie laughed. ”That’s your reason?”

”Yes. I can lie down without either of you touching me.”

Angela immediately stretched one leg across Karen’s lap.

Karen shoved it off. ”Get away from me.”

Angela laughed and rolled onto her stomach, looking far too comfortable. Roxie had missed this. Just the three of them doing absolutely nothing important, surrounded by Angela’s pillows and the clothes she had apparently tried on earlier and never bothered putting away.

The last memory Roxie had of Angela on this bed was her crying her heart out.

It had buried almost every good memory they had made in this room, and Roxie hated that. She wasn’t going to let that night own Angela’s bedroom forever.

”So what’s between you and Mason?” Angela asked.

Roxie immediately grinned and rolled onto her side so she could see both of them.

Karen rolled her eyes so hard Roxie almost laughed before she even answered. ”Nothing.”

”Nothing?” Angela repeated.

”I told him he’s not my type.”

Roxie unlocked her phone while listening and opened Zac’s location. His little dot was still sitting at Dylan’s house. It had been there for almost two hours now.

She put the phone back down. ”You know Mason would probably be a good boyfriend.”

Angela grinned immediately. ”Why would you say that? Now Mason really has no chance. You know Karen’s type.”

Karen slowly looked at her. ”What type?”

Angela’s grin got wider.

Roxie already knew what was coming.

”Edgelord wannabe.”

”Edgelord wannabe,” Roxie said at the exact same time.

They both burst out laughing.

Karen grabbed the nearest pillow and threw it straight at Angela’s face.

”You two are assholes.”

Angela caught it and threw it back, still laughing. ”Tell me I’m wrong.”

”You’re wrong.”

Roxie raised an eyebrow. ”Your dating history says otherwise. What was your last boyfriend’s name again?”

Karen opened her mouth.

Roxie beat her to it. ”Count Dracula?”

Another pillow came flying toward her.

Roxie ducked, laughing as it hit the wall behind her. ”See? Violence because you can’t defend yourself.”

”Both of you can shut up.”

Roxie was still smiling when her phone buzzed. She picked it up, saw that the notification was nothing important, then opened Zac’s location again anyway.

Still at Dylan’s.

Angela noticed immediately.

”Oh, okay.” She rolled onto her back. ”Just throw it in our faces that you have a boyfriend.”

Karen sighed happily. ”Now you know how I feel.”

Roxie laughed. ”It’s not even that. Zac and Dylan have some kind of call with their college coach today. I’m just worried because neither of them really told me what it was about.”

Karen sat up a little. ”Tennessee?”

”Yeah.”

That seemed to remind her of something.

Karen looked at Roxie for a moment before asking, ”So what’s your decision?”

Roxie’s thumb stopped over the screen.

”What decision?”

”You know what decision.” Karen nudged her foot. ”You can come with us to New York.”

Angela immediately lifted her head. ”Yes.”

Roxie looked down again and scrolled through her phone even though she wasn’t really reading anything anymore.

When Karen had first mentioned New York months ago, Roxie had known for a fact that she couldn’t go. College itself had barely felt possible then.

Now things were different.

The trust from her father was in her hands. Money wasn’t the problem anymore. If Roxie wanted to go to New York, she could. If she wanted to go to Tennessee, she could. If she wanted to stay here and enroll somewhere nearby, she could do that too.

Choices. She sighed.

Tennessee with Zac.

New York with Karen and Angela.

Or staying here.

There should have been no question.

Tennessee should have been the automatic answer.

Tennessee had been the plan.

So why did it still feel like it wasn’t hers?

God. This fucking problem again.

It was the same thing that had been sitting between her and Zac for months, even before they broke up. The same subject neither of them seemed capable of talking about properly. Zac had even started changing the subject whenever Tennessee and Roxie’s plans came up together for too long.

Roxie locked her phone and stared at the black screen.

Apparently the problem she had been trying very hard to ignore had followed her all the way into Angela’s bedroom.

She took a breath. ”Zac and I decided on Tennessee.”

Karen’s expression changed slightly.

Angela stayed quiet.

Roxie continued before either of them could say anything. ”We haven’t finalized everything yet, but yeah. We started looking at apartments together. I’ve been checking programs there and jobs too. I could work for a while if I take a gap year. I still haven’t figured out exactly what I want.”

Angela rolled onto her back and stared at the ceiling.

”Wow.”

Roxie looked at her. ”What?”

Angela stayed quiet for a moment before turning her head. ”That’s scary.”

Roxie frowned. ”What’s scary?”

”You and Zac.” Angela looked at her. ”You guys are so committed to each other.”

Something in Roxie’s chest tightened.

She swallowed.

Angela had probably thought the same thing about Caleb.

Maybe they had talked about college too. Maybe they had made plans Roxie knew nothing about. Maybe Angela had already imagined where they would live, when they would visit each other, what their schedules would look like and how they would make everything work.

Maybe Angela had once looked at Caleb exactly the way Roxie looked at Zac and thought there was no reason to imagine a future without him.

And now it was gone.

Karen suddenly slapped the mattress and tapped Angela’s hand.

”Friends are forever.” She waved her other hand dismissively. ”Boyfriends are temporary.”

Angela stared at her for half a second before laughing.

”You’re terrible.”

”I’m right.”

Angela moved closer and wrapped both arms around Karen.

Karen immediately started pushing at her shoulder. ”Get off me.”

”You love me.”

”I tolerate you.”

Angela only hugged her tighter, laughing into Karen’s shoulder. ”You’re right. We’ll all be friends forever.”

Karen had obviously said it for Angela.

Roxie knew that.

She had seen the way Karen’s expression changed before she made the joke and how quickly she tried to drag Angela away from wherever her thoughts had started going.

But the words still landed somewhere Roxie wasn’t expecting.

Friends were forever.

Boyfriends were temporary.

Angela suddenly sat up. ”Okay. Enough college.”

Karen immediately agreed. ”Thank God.”

”You brought it up.”

”I know. I regret everything.”

Angela reached for the remote on her nightstand. ”Movie.”

Roxie looked at her suspiciously. ”What kind?”

Angela smiled.

Karen groaned before she even answered. ”Please, not The Notebook.”

Angela looked offended. ”The Notebook won awards.”

”Noah’s stupid.”

”That’s because you have no heart.”

Karen grabbed one of the smaller pillows and tucked it under her head. ”My heart is perfectly fine. My tolerance for bullshit is low.”

Roxie laughed. ”Coming from the woman whose type is apparently unemployed eyeliner.”

Karen slowly turned her head.

Roxie immediately reached for a pillow to protect herself.

Karen launched one at her anyway.

By the time Angela finally picked another movie, they had ordered enough food for twice as many people and rearranged half her bed. Roxie ended up in the middle with a bowl of popcorn balanced against her stomach while Karen complained about practically every decision the characters made.

”He literally has a phone,” Karen said twenty minutes into the movie. ”Call her.”

Angela threw popcorn at her. ”Just watch. You’re ruining it for me.”

”I am watching. That’s why I’m angry. This wouldn’t happen in real life.”

Roxie reached into the bowl. ”Conflict develops the relationship.”

Karen pointed at the television. ”That man has created seven problems because he refuses to send one text.”

Angela looked at Roxie. ”She’s going to be horrible to Mason.”

Karen almost choked on her drink. ”Why are you still involving Mason?”

”Because it’s funny.”

”He isn’t my boyfriend.”

”Yet.”

Karen threw another piece of popcorn at her.

For a while, it stayed like that. Angela complained every time Karen talked over the movie, Karen kept predicting scenes before they happened, and Roxie kept laughing whenever the two of them started arguing.

Eventually, though, the room got quieter.

On the television, the guy pulled off his hoodie and put it around the girl’s shoulders before pulling her against him.

Something about Angela’s face changed.

It was small enough that Roxie almost missed it.

Her smile disappeared.

She looked down at her hands.

Roxie’s stomach tightened.

Before she could say anything, Angela pushed herself off the bed.

”I’m getting water.”

Karen looked toward the unopened bottles beside them. ”There are bottles right there.”

Angela was already heading for the door. ”I want cold water.”

Then she was gone.

Karen looked at the bottle beside Angela’s pillow.

Roxie looked at Karen.

Neither of them said anything at first.

The movie kept playing.

A minute passed.

Then another.

Karen reached for the remote and paused it.

Roxie sat up. ”She’s probably in the bathroom.”

Karen was already getting off the bed. ”Come on.”

They checked the hallway first.

The bathroom door was open.

Angela wasn’t there.

Karen headed downstairs, and Roxie followed her through the quiet house. Angela’s parents were somewhere toward the back, and the television in the family room was playing low enough that nobody seemed to notice the two of them walking through.

They reached the kitchen.

No Angela.

Then Roxie heard something.

She stopped.

It was quiet at first, partly buried underneath the television inside the house.

A broken inhale.

Then another.

Karen heard it too.

Her expression changed immediately.

The veranda door was slightly open.

They walked toward it without speaking.

Angela sat outside with her back partly turned toward them, curled forward on one of the chairs with both hands pressed against her face.

Her shoulders shook.

The sound coming from her was so controlled that Roxie realized Angela was trying to cry quietly.

Karen stopped beside her.

For several seconds, neither of them moved.

Then Angela dragged both hands down her face and looked up.

Embarrassment appeared immediately.

”I’m fine.”

Karen stared at her.

Angela quickly wiped underneath her eyes. ”Seriously. Go finish the movie.”

Karen opened the veranda door wider. ”We said that’s a banned phrase.”

Angela let out a broken laugh, but another sob caught behind it.

Roxie stepped outside.

Angela looked away and wiped her face again, but it was useless now. The tears kept coming faster than she could clear them.

”I’m sorry.”

Roxie pulled another chair closer. ”Why are you apologizing?”

”Because I’m being stupid.”

”You’re crying.”

”Exactly.”

Karen sat on Angela’s other side. ”People cry.”

Angela looked down at her hands.

”I’m still crying over him.”

That quieted all three of them.

Angela pressed both palms against her eyes again and breathed hard.

”I hate it,” she whispered. ”I fucking hate that I still want him.”

Roxie looked at Karen.

Karen’s face had gone completely serious.

Angela shook her head. ”After everything, I still wake up and check my phone. I still look for his name. Sometimes I hear a car outside and think it’s him. I keep wondering if he’s eating or sleeping or if his parents are treating him like shit because of me.”

Her voice cracked.

”And the worst part is if he called me right now, I don’t even know what I’d do.”

Karen reached for her hand.

Angela let her take it.

”I know I should hate him.”

”You don’t have to hate him,” Roxie said.

Angela laughed bitterly through the tears. ”That would probably make this easier.”

She wiped her face with the sleeve of her shirt.

Roxie watched her for a few seconds before moving closer.

Karen moved too.

Angela ended up between them, Roxie’s arm around one side of her and Karen holding onto the other.

She cried harder for a while.

Neither Roxie nor Karen tried to stop her.

There wasn’t anything useful to say anyway.

Whatever Angela still felt for Caleb wasn’t going to disappear because they reminded her of everything that had happened. She already knew. She knew what his family had done. She knew he had still walked away. She knew how badly everything afterward had destroyed her.

Knowing all of that apparently didn’t erase loving him.

Eventually Angela’s breathing started settling.

Her head rested against Roxie while one of her hands remained tangled with Karen’s.

Karen squeezed it.

Roxie looked down at both of them.

”We’re here,” she said quietly. ”That’s what matters.”