I Am Your Natural Enemy

”Minister Cai, look, you haven’t been causing trouble for a while now, your face is turning blue. Don’t make things difficult for yourself, really, if you want to do something bad, do it to outsiders, everything will be fine.”

”Cai Heizi, if you don’t get up, I’ll check your browsing history!”

”This means you consented, can’t blame me.”

Wen Yan reached out and picked up Cai Heizi’s phone, tapped it, and surprisingly it lit up. Wen Yan chuckled.

”Don’t tell me it’s the Great Zombie here who comes messing around, helping you charge it?”

Wen Yan took Cai Heizi’s hand, used the fingerprint unlock, but after unlocking it required both face recognition and a pattern password.

Wen Yan tried, but didn’t manage to unlock it. In the lock screen state, he pulled down the notification bar but could only see notifications without their content.

Just by looking at which app the notifications came from, Wen Yan could get a general idea of what was going on.

Wen Yan extended his nails and lightly scratched Cai Heizi’s skin. The result was the same as last time: he seemed dead, yet not really dead. Wen Yan took away the corpse poison, and didn’t bother confirming.

He simply recounted recent events to Cai Heizi. If Cai Heizi could hear, great; if not, it was just a chance to relax and review himself a bit.

After he finished speaking, Wen Yan turned around and left, going to pay a visit to Aunt Gan.

Aunt Gan was said to be reading inside, Wen Yan didn’t go in. He stayed outside waiting, saw her briefly, and asked if she knew anything.

After about ten minutes, he couldn’t get any useful clues, so Wen Yan left with the Deformed Corpse Maid.

Upon leaving, all the Great Zombies that were hidden suddenly appeared, with dirt clinging to them, as if they had just crawled out of the ground.

Some could hardly speak, their bodies reeked of freshly unearthed smell.

Wen Yan was initially puzzled, but upon seeing the eyes of some Great Zombies, he instantly understood.

He blessed each Great Zombie he encountered with Yang Energy and was escorted warmly out of the Zombie Cave by a group of Great Zombies.

Standing at the entrance of the Zombie Cave, Wen Yan looked at the pile of stuff in his arms, a bit dazed.

There were irregularly shaped Scorching Sun Jade embedded with soil, colored Jade Cicadas, Zombie Teeth clearly tainted with corpse poison, a Heart Protecting Mirror bearing numerous scars but still intact, Horseshoe Gold, a Bronze Wine Vessel...

One Great Zombie, having nothing else to offer as a welcoming gift, detached one of its arms and intended to give it to Wen Yan.

After much persuasion, Wen Yan managed to make the other party understand that he truly wasn’t rejecting the gift.

Now standing at the door, looking at the pile of Ming Qi in his arms, Wen Yan sighed lightly, thinking ’Oh well, it’s all their goodwill. I’ll take them home as decorations, though normal things at home keep getting less and less.’

Wen Yan left with the items, back in the Zombie Cave, a bunch of Great Zombies still in slumber woke up, using the benefits to accelerate their revival.

The Great Zombies on Fuyu Mountain are all on the right path, they won’t absorb human Yang Energy or blood, disdaining such acts which might pollute their cultivation.

However, the Yang Energy blessed by Wen Yan was not only abundant, but also had no side effects, which they really liked.

Inside the Zombie Cave, it was chaotic, a group of freshly unearthed Great Zombies were still checking with other pre-awakened Great Zombies about the situation.

A Great Zombie covered in dirt, with rusted armor, finally had a slightly clearer head, and upon hearing Wen Yan is not only the current Scorching Sun but also achieved such feats after only three months of practicing martial arts, felt regretful in reattaching his arm.

If he had known earlier, he wouldn’t have given away an arm. No wonder Wen Yan rejected it, he should have given away his whole self.

”Stop making a fuss here, the miss is reading, and there are guests at home.”

The Great Zombies dispersed individually, and the Deformed Corpse Maid came to Cai Qidong, looked at the still sleeping Cai Qidong, and smiled.

”I did as agreed, you can rest assured now.

If Wen Yan asks me, I definitely won’t hide anything from him.

But he didn’t ask me, so I kept silent as per the agreement.”

After speaking these words, the Deformed Corpse Maid turned to leave, regardless of whether Cai Qidong had awakened or not.

The Zombie Cave gradually quieted down, and as dusk approached, during the transition between sun and moon, Cai Qidong slowly opened his eyes.

He looked at the phone in his hand and sighed helplessly.

No signal.

Even he wasn’t sure of his current situation.

Whether considered dead or alive.

Considered dead, yet his heart occasionally flutters.

Considered alive, yet his prostate doesn’t rebel anymore.

As time ticked away, when Yin Qi surged and Yang Energy faded, he fell back into slumber once more, with the heart that had just fluttered a few times halting its beat again.

Meanwhile, Wen Yan returned home and placed all the gifts he received on a shelf as decorations.

Initially wanted to wash them, but then feared damaging the artifacts, pondering they’d gather dust later anyway, he might as well leave them as is.

During the routine recitation of Transcendence Scriptures, transcending the Lost Souls inside the Exorcised Black Mountain Stone Sculpture, noticing the artifacts started emitting Yin Qi and some fragments of Lost Souls were transcended and dissipated, Wen Yan felt even less inclined to arrange them meticulously, opting to transcend them all together.

Uncertain about the Great Zombies’ past deeds, merely looking at the artifacts’ traces, it was evident that each was left behind after some real knife-and-gun action.

No wonder the Great Zombies of Fuyu Mountain always looked down on the Zombies outside, the gap was quite apparent.