I Became a Witch in a World Full of Urban Legends

After leaving the police station, Professor Ma drove Lu Yibei back home, repeatedly reminding him to thoroughly familiarize himself with the artifact materials he had been given earlier.

As soon as Lu Yibei returned home and pulled out his keys to unlock the door, he saw the Jacket-clad figure standing on the coffee table, slightly bent over, fiddling with something.

Moving closer to take a look, he saw a group of little Hauntings surrounding a barely-breathing eyeball.

“You… you vile woman, you’re finally… back…”

Upon seeing this, the denture approached the eyeball, nudging it gently. “All living things must die, and so must hauntings. Eyeball brother, may you rest in peace.”

“Lady Witch, please save it!” the hairball pleaded mournfully.

“Shut… shut up! I don’t need this vile woman’s pity!” the eyeball shouted with a sudden burst of energy, only to have its pupils lose focus and collapse onto the coffee table like a pile of sludge.

Lu Yibei frowned and pointed at the eyeball. “What’s wrong with it?”

“Lady Witch, you may not know,” the hairball explained. “Not long after you left, it started experiencing a streak of bad luck-hit by a car, electrocuted by faulty appliances, scolded by its boss for work mistakes, and even captured by some brat while trying to scare humans. The kid treated it like a toy, locking it in a tin can of fermented herring for three whole hours. Three hours! We still don’t know how it survived that ordeal…”

“Wait!” Lu Yibei interrupted upon hearing this. “I think I know what’s going on.”Earlier, it seemed to have swallowed a chip, but it neither passed it nor digested it, right?

It must have absorbed the world’s malice.

Even though it was just a “1” denomination chip, it still carried the world’s malice from an Eldritch Destroyer. Torturing a Class D haunting? Piece of cake, Lu Yibei thought.

“Can it still be saved?”

“Yes,” Lu Yibei nodded.

“Then please, Lady Witch…”

“But there’s nothing I can do about it,” Lu Yibei shrugged, cutting them off. “Just leave it as it is!”

With that, he turned and headed upstairs. Halfway up the stairs, he stopped and looked at his jacket.

“By the way, Jacket, I need to go on a trip tomorrow. Could you help me pack some things if you have time?”

Hearing this, the Jacket-clad figure on the coffee table twisted its body, glancing at the eyeball and then at Lu Yibei, seemingly hesitant.

,,Ծ‸Ծ,,

“Don’t worry, it won’t die. At most, it’ll suffer a bit. Letting it endure more torment is actually a good thing-it’ll keep its energy in check,” Lu Yibei reassured the Jacket figure.

“You wretched woman! How cruel of you to stand by and do nothing! I… I-“

Before the eyeball could finish its sentence, it suddenly sprang up as if resurrected.

However, its bouncing form slipped on the water dripping from the nightgown on the coffee table. With a “whoosh,” it flew off, crashing into the kitchen trash can.

The trash can rolled forward, knocking over a broom leaning against the wall. The broom struck the cabinet, causing the cutting board to jolt. A kitchen knife flew into the air and landed with a “thunk!” just 0.002 centimeters away from the eyeball.

The little Hauntings fell silent.

“What did I say?” Lu Yibei shrugged nonchalantly. “It won’t die.”

The essence of the world’s malice lies in inflicting eternal suffering on its target. Dying? Not so easy.

Morning, Hua City Folk Culture Administration Bureau.

The Office V was eerily quiet, as if time had frozen. Only the sunlight streaming through the wooden windows, illuminating the floating dust particles, hinted at the passage of time.

Jiang Li had arrived at her office early in the morning. Sitting at her desk, she frowned at her computer screen.

Displayed on the screen was the Wanted List of The Midnight Watchers Society, which she had pulled up from the internal network. At the 92nd spot on the list was the name “Calamity,” marked with an upward arrow and the number “↑7.”

For some reason, “Calamity,” originally at the bottom of the Wanted List, had risen seven places in threat level within just over a month.

Clicking on the name “Calamity” to view the details, Jiang Li noticed that several new potential threats had been added to the list.

Was someone secretly investigating her and feeding the gathered information to The Midnight Watchers Society headquarters?

Jiang Li sighed silently, exited the internal network interface, and began reviewing the mountain of documents piled on her desk.

She had been away from Hua City for nearly a month, and thanks to a certain proxy operator’s slacker work habits, the backlog of tasks was overwhelming.

After all, Lu Yibei, as a proxy operator, lacked the authority to fully take over Jiang Li’s responsibilities. While he could handle routine tasks, a significant portion of the work required her personal attention.

For instance, compiling data on the Eclipse Society’s movements, summarizing the daylight duration changes in Hua City, and consolidating data on psychic energy fluctuations around the city…

The main operators of Hua City’s Midnight Watchers Society each had their own individual assignments, aside from the weekly night watch duties.

It was like this: Bai Kai was in charge of monitoring the movements of psychics and hauntings in Hua City, An Qing handled the disposal of haunting remnants, and the mushroom girl was responsible for the security of The Midnight Watchers Society headquarters in Hua City…

Jiang Li had her own responsibilities too. She was in charge of information consolidation and archive management.

She would be working overtime for quite a while.

Before long, the office door opened.

Lu Yibei walked in, saw Jiang Li bent over her desk, busy with work, and parted his lips slightly as if to say something. Instead, he walked straight to the sofa on the side, sat down, and quietly waited, his gaze soft and affectionate as he watched her in a daze.

Immersed in her work, Jiang Li didn’t notice Lu Yibei’s arrival until Ah-Hua brought her a cup of freshly brewed strong tea and softly reminded her. Only then did she snap out of her focus.

“Sorry, I left things to the wrong person before my vacation, and now there’s a lot of work to handle.”

She spoke calmly, looking at Lu Yibei. “What’s up with you?”

“Me? Nothing’s up.”

Jiang Li glanced at the visibly drained Lu Yibei and said indifferently, “If nothing’s up, why are you here? If you’re looking to practice body technique, you’ll have to wait until I finish this workload. It’ll take at least three to five days.”

Lu Yibei: “…”

Wow, this woman, so cold?

Yesterday, she was snuggling in my arms, all soft and vulnerable, and today, it’s like nothing ever happened.

Why do I feel like I’ve been played and discarded by a heartless woman?

Grumbling internally, Lu Yibei scratched the back of his head. “Well… Boss, I’m actually here to report back from my leave. I took half a month off earlier, and technically, I should report back, right?”

“Mm.” Jiang Li nodded. “That’s indeed required.”

As she spoke, she bent down, rummaged through a drawer in her desk, pulled out a form, and then grabbed a pen from the pen holder. She walked over and handed them to Lu Yibei.

“Here, and here. Fill in your name in these two spots, and I’ll handle the rest.”

Taking the pen and form, Lu Yibei quickly filled in his name while leaning over the coffee table. He handed the form back to Jiang Li. “Boss, does this mean my leave is officially over?”

“Mm.” Jiang Li nodded. “If there’s nothing else, you’re free to go.”

“No need to rush!” Lu Yibei said. “Now that my leave is over, doesn’t that mean I can apply for leave again?”

Jiang Li looked at Lu Yibei, her expression turning a bit complicated. After a long silence, she nodded. “Theoretically, yes…”

“Then I’m applying for leave!” Lu Yibei blurted out.

What is this, some kind of credit card cash advance? Jiang Li thought to herself, rubbing her temples. She said flatly, “What mischief are you planning now?”

“Come on, Boss, how could I have any bad intentions?” Lu Yibei said seriously. “This time, I’m going to… no, I’m going to protect humanity’s cultural treasures, safeguard the precious heritage of our ancestors, and defend-“

“Speak human language,” Jiang Li interrupted.

Lu Yibei shrugged and said expressionlessly, “My professor from before, remember? He’s planning to take me along for a research project.”

“Now, there’s been a grave-robbing incident at the project site, and the professor has been invited to help recover the artifacts. I’ll be tagging along as an assistant.”

An assistant, and also muscle.

That’s right, Hua City University of Technology, College of Liberal Arts’ dual-wielding star, that’s me. Lu Yibei mused internally.

“So last night, you were putting yourself in the shoes of a grave robber, trying to understand their mindset in advance to prepare for the job, huh?” Jiang Li teased. “Did you dig anything up?”

A faint blush crept onto Lu Yibei’s cheeks. “…” Damn it, how did she know?

As if reading his mind, Jiang Li took a sip of her strong tea and said calmly, “The stonemason at Lion Rock Public Cemetery is Qing-Jie’s informant. Before you came, she was here laughing about it with me for half an hour.”

“Uh…” Lu Yibei froze for a moment, then tentatively asked, “So, will you approve this leave?”

Hopefully not. That way, I’ll have an excuse not to go with the professor.

“Of course,” Jiang Li said, taking a deep breath. Her expression turned serious. “Go ahead, go.”

“Really?”

Lu Yibei squinted at Jiang Li, his expression thoughtful.

She agreed so easily. Something feels off.

It’s like she’s saying, “Go ahead, go. Just don’t come back if you dare!”

“Protecting cultural artifacts is a good thing. Why would I stop you?”

This is all positive stuff. If your identity gets exposed in the future, it might even help reduce your sentence. Jiang Li mused internally.

“So I’m really leaving now?” Lu Yibei probed.

I came straight here from the police station early in the morning, haven’t even had breakfast yet, and you’re not even going to try to keep me here?

Jiang Li nodded. “Go.”

Lu Yibei frowned, staring at Jiang Li for a long time. Finally, he scratched his head. “But if I leave, what about you?”

Jiang Li froze for a moment. After a long pause, she closed her eyes and shook her head with a bitter smile.

“I’ll do what I have to do, just like the past nineteen years.”

Love is important, but it has never been the entirety of life.

“Go. Safe travels, and come back soon.”

Not long after Lu Yibei left, Ah-Hua arrived at Jiang Li’s office with breakfast in hand. She paused in front of Jiang Li’s desk, hesitating as if she had something to say but couldn’t find the words.

Noticing Ah-Hua’s unusual demeanor, Jiang Li looked up and asked, “Ah-Hua, is there something you want to tell me?”

“Miss…” Ah-Hua hesitated several times before finally speaking. “Are you really planning to do that? Isn’t it a bit too…”

Jiang Li picked up a piece of fried dough from the plate, tore off a bite, and smiled playfully. “Whatever Meow Meow-chan does has nothing to do with me, does it?”

Hearing this, Ah-Hua seemed to understand something, her eyes lighting up. “Then, Miss, shall I go fetch it for you?”

“No rush. Let him wait a bit. We’ll deal with it when we get back tonight,” Jiang Li said casually.

That night, at Jingyi Apartment complex, in Lu Yibei’s home-a makeshift alchemy workshop.

After maneuvering “Miss Qiu” into eighteen different positions and finally cramming her into a metal box, Lu Yibei mixed the remaining disaster water with some alchemical scraps he had bought from Fat Master, along with blood he had “borrowed” from the eyeball. With these, he crafted over twenty Alchemical Bombs 3.0.

Although he wasn’t sure if this method would allow the bombs to inflict even the slightest bit of the world’s malice on their targets upon detonation, it was worth a try.

After packing his belongings, Lu Yibei slung the metal box over his back and headed to the courier station at the entrance of the apartment complex. He sent an express package to the hotel where the professor was staying, estimating that it would arrive around the same time he did.

This trip to Tang City had a high probability of involving conflicts with psychics or hauntings.

Given his current poor physical condition, Lu Yibei felt uneasy without making some extra preparations. However, the Alchemical Bombs, filled with glowing, viscous liquid, would never pass airport security. After much thought, he concluded that courier delivery was his only viable option.

Back home, with nothing else to do, Lu Yibei finally had some downtime. He sat at his desk and opened the files Professor Ma had sent him on his laptop.

For some reason, ever since Professor Ma had compared those artifacts to figurines, Lu Yibei felt that as long as he glanced at the images, he could remember them perfectly.

And if he couldn’t, couldn’t he always ask Miss Gou Meng-the pesky little sister and creator of artifacts-for help?

From the map, Tang City wasn’t far from Taoyuan, only seventy or eighty kilometers in total.

Just as he thought of Gou Meng, a familiar object flashed across his mind. He froze for a moment, quickly scrolling through the files until he found the image he had just seen.

“Isn’t this…”

Lu Yibei stared at the image, then at the patterns on the bronze artifact in the picture. Suddenly, he raised his hand, looked at the back of it, then back at the artifact. Finally, he let out a succinct and expressive exclamation: “Damn!”

The patterns on this bronze artifact were identical to Gou Meng’s mark!

Could it be that she’d picked up some bad habits, causing her business in Taoyuan to fail, and now she was selling off her possessions?

If it were that pesky little sister, this was entirely within the realm of possibility!

With this thought, Lu Yibei picked up his phone and dialed the contact number Gou Meng had left him-the landline for the forest ranger’s cabin behind Taoyuan.

Just then, his phone buzzed twice, followed by two notifications from a certain social app.

The messages were from a familiar ID, and their content was a picture and a short message.

Meow Meow-chan: [Image]

Meow Meow-chan: Heard you’re going on a trip soon? Here’s a talisman for you. Wishing you a safe journey. [heart emoji]

In the image.

A gown resembling a pristine white wedding dress adorned Meow Meow-chan. Beneath the sheer fabric of the off-shoulder dress, faint patterns of large white flowers were visible.

A white headpiece encased her golden hair, styled into a neat updo. The hem of the knee-length dress revealed long legs wrapped in white stockings, and a pair of crystal shoes shimmered faintly.

In her hand was a long weapon, part sword and part gun. Its sharp edge extended from the center of a massive blooming snow lotus, gleaming with a cold light.

Lu Yibei: “!!!”

This… this… this…

Is this a cosplay of The Flower of Chaotic Parallel Timelines?!

Damn, has “Meow Meow-chan” finally remembered her main profession?

Wang Buliuxing: “Hey? More, please?”

Meow Meow-chan: “That’s it for now. Next time. [heart emoji]”