I Became a Witch in a World Full of Urban Legends

“Name?”

Lu Yibei stared blankly at the police officer sitting across from him, his emotions a complex tangle.

“Lu Yibei…”

“Age?”

“Nineteen.”

The police officer lowered his head to jot down the information, then looked up at Lu Yibei with a serious expression. “Tell me what happened.”

“Uh…” Lu Yibei opened his mouth, hesitated for a moment as if recalling something, and then timidly asked, “Comrade, this situation… it won’t be filed, right?”

“That depends on your behavior and the severity of the circumstances.”

“Oh, oh, I’ll definitely behave well, confess honestly, and turn over a new leaf.”

This kid probably isn’t a first-time offender, is he? Sitting there cuffed, he looks as comfortable as if he’s at home… The police officer silently grumbled to himself, then straightened up and said, “Go on!”“Yes, yes.” Lu Yibei nodded repeatedly. “On the day of the incident, at 2:30 a.m., the suspect, Lu-uh, me-brought a sledgehammer as the tool of the crime and went to Lion Rock Public Cemetery, intending to smash open Lu Yibei’s graveyard and retrieve the contents inside…”

“Wait a minute!” The police officer raised his hand to interrupt. “You just said you were planning to smash open whose graveyard?”

“Lu Yibei’s.”

“And what’s your name?”

“Lu… Lu Yibei?”

The police officer stared at him in astonishment, furrowing his brow. “So you’re saying you were planning to rob your own grave?”

Lu Yibei thought for a moment and replied earnestly, “From a purely rational perspective, yes.”

“Bang!”

The police officer slammed the table, his voice rising. “Ridiculous! Who would dig up their own grave? Besides, how does a living person even have a graveyard?”

That kind of thing-living people don’t build graves!

As soon as the officer finished speaking, he seemed to hear some commotion outside the room. A knock sounded at the door, and then another officer poked his head in, calling the first officer out.

The room fell silent. From outside, faint voices could be heard. Catching the sound, Lu Yibei’s eyes darted around mischievously as he perked up his ears to listen closely.

“Zhang, I just confirmed with the folks at the cemetery. The grave he smashed-it really does have ‘Lu Yibei’s Grave’ written on the tombstone, and the birth and death dates match his information…”

“So you’re saying he really was digging up his own grave?” The officer addressed as Zhang asked in astonishment. “Then is he alive, or…”

“He looks alive, but who knows? With all these haunting incidents nowadays…” the other officer murmured.

“If you ask me, maybe we should just let him go. I can’t shake the feeling he’s giving off some eerie vibes. Makes my back feel cold-I even put on my winter coat.”

“Just let him go like that?” Zhang countered.

“The thing is, it’s hard to pin a crime on him for this!”

“…” Zhang was momentarily speechless.

Indeed, Lu Yibei’s situation was difficult to classify legally. Digging up a modern grave would typically fall under theft and desecration of a corpse.

But he was smashing his own grave. The items inside, logically speaking, belonged to him. While the act might be controversial in theory, it didn’t constitute a crime in practice.

As for desecration of a corpse, that was even less applicable. Not only was there no corpse in the grave, but even if there were, handling one’s own body-whether harshly or gently-would only count as self-harm or, at most, self-touch.

After a long pause, Zhang sighed silently. “I guess that’s the only option. I’ll go back in and tell him to pay a fine, then call someone from his family to come and take him home.”

Hearing this, Lu Yibei frowned slightly, his mind racing to figure out who he could call to pick him up.

Jiang Li was definitely out of the question. If she found out about this, she’d laugh at him for the rest of his life.

Shui-Ge wouldn’t work either. He wouldn’t be able to explain why he had a graveyard.

Du Sixian was also a no-go. She was always mingling with those hauntings nowadays. If word got out, it would tarnish his glorious reputation in Hua City’s haunting circles.

That left only…

“Creek!”

The door to the room swung open, and Zhang walked back in, his expression serious as he looked at Lu Yibei. “Kid, we’ve got your situation figured out. In a bit, you can pay the fine, then call someone from your family to come sign for you, and you’ll be free to go.”

“I don’t have anyone else in my family except me. Can I call my teacher instead?” Lu Yibei asked.

Zhang nodded. “Your school’s teacher? That works.”

After a pause, he leaned closer to Lu Yibei and asked in a low voice, “By the way, why do you have a graveyard?”

Lu Yibei pondered for two seconds, sighed, and replied helplessly, “Officer, to be honest, it’s all my ex-girlfriend’s fault!”

“Isn’t it all over the internet now-when you break up, you treat your ex like they’re dead? But I never thought she’d actually go this far, secretly burying my most beloved figurine in there. Isn’t that infuriating?”

“So when I found out, I couldn’t sleep at night. I rushed over to smash that grave.”

Young women these days sure know how to play… Zhang grumbled internally, then sympathetically patted Lu Yibei on the shoulder. “Kid, don’t dwell on it too much. A girl with such a peculiar temperament-breaking up might actually be a blessing.”

“By the way, do you smoke?”

“No, no.” Lu Yibei waved his hand, then popped a spicy strip into his mouth. “This is enough for me.”

Zhang: “???”

Where did he pull that out from?

“By the way, Officer, after I leave, can I still smash that grave?”

Zhang rolled his eyes at him. “What do you think?”

Lu Yibei: “…” Looks like that’s a no.

5:47 a.m., Hua City University of Technology Family Housing Complex

At this hour, there was no sign of dawn yet. The entire complex was shrouded in darkness, except for one lit room in Building 6, Apartment 702.

That was Professor Ma’s home, and the lit room was his study. As the departure time approached and news from Tang City kept pouring in, he found himself unable to sleep.

Inside the study, Professor Ma sat at his computer, one hand holding a cup of strong tea, the other scrolling through images sent by the project team. His expression was grave.

The picture displayed a variety of artifacts: a black pottery tripod, a bronze drinking goblet, jade slips with bone script… More than twenty dazzling artifacts, each with a unique shape. If someone unaware of the situation saw this, they might think Professor Ma was browsing a museum’s collection page.

However, all these artifacts had been discovered in the various antique trading markets around Tang City in recent times. Each one held immense historical and cultural research value.

Ordinarily, the chance to come across even a single such artifact was rare and precious. Now, a sudden flood of them had appeared, making it hard not to suspect that there was something more behind the scenes.

Some even speculated that the reason for this phenomenon was that a certain ancient Dongyi culture tomb cluster in the vicinity of Tang City had been plundered by criminals.

It was precisely because the authorities had discovered a large number of artifacts flowing into the market that the project team was forced to begin their research ahead of schedule.

Unlike before, this time the project team not only conducted research but also shouldered the mission of assisting the authorities in recovering stolen artifacts.

“Sinful, sinful indeed!”

Professor Ma looked at each photo, sighing with deep anguish. Suddenly, a certain image flashed before his eyes, making him tremble slightly. His finger left the mouse wheel as he stared at the picture on the screen, frowning.

The image showed a bronze artifact, shaped like a flying bird. Its eyes protruded, gazing forward, the bird’s head lifted, wings slightly spread, feathers full, long tail gilded. The base was square, each side adorned with openwork cloud patterns. The design closely resembled a gilt phoenix bird-shaped ornament from the Western Han, unearthed years ago.

That Western Han artifact, discovered over a decade ago, was widely believed to be a continuation of the Dongyi people’s ancestral bird worship.

But this bronze artifact in the photo, clearly older, was not the familiar phoenix bird shape. Rather, it looked somewhat like…

A magpie?

Professor Ma frowned. The totem worshipped in Dongyi culture was indeed a bird, but all previous artifacts mainly featured the phoenix. There seemed to be no evidence of a magpie-worshipping culture.

“This thing…”

It was very peculiar. If he could observe it up close, perhaps it could open a new direction for Dongyi cultural research. As Professor Ma considered this, he scrolled the mouse wheel and noticed the caption beneath the photo, sighing wordlessly.

[Bronze magpie bird-shaped ornament: stolen.

Last seen: three days ago, at an underground antique market in Tang City.]

Professor Ma stared at the bronze artifact in the picture, his expression lost and disappointed, muttering, “What a pity, such a pity…”

As he spoke, he scrolled the mouse back to that same image.

Just as he was about to study it further, he suddenly noticed several tiny special characters on the side of the bronze artifact, partially concealed by dirt.

Noticing those small characters, Professor Ma paused in surprise and hurriedly zoomed in on the image, scrutinizing them with his years of experience in special characters research.

“Gou… something, something… Mou? Ugh, the rest of the characters are all scraped off? Tsk! Damn grave robber, can’t even do a proper job, it’s enough to drive a person mad!”

Professor Ma cursed fiercely. Just then, his phone on the desk began to vibrate. He picked it up, glanced at the screen, answered the call, and immediately heard a robust voice from the other side.

“Hello, is this Ma Zhen, Professor Ma?”

“Yes, I am. And you are?” Professor Ma inquired.

“I’m a police officer from the Lion Mountain Police Station. Do you know someone named Lu Yibei?”

That brat again, caught by the police? Professor Ma grumbled inwardly, then quickly replied, “Yes, yes, I know-she’s my granddaughter.”

“Granddaughter!?” The police officer on the other end exclaimed in surprise, glancing over at Lu Yibei, who was absentmindedly chewing on spicy strips and staring at the ceiling, and fell into contemplation.

“Uh…” Professor Ma hesitated, then probed, “Or… student?”

Police officer, “…”

Seeing the officer didn’t interrupt, Professor Ma cleared his throat and said earnestly, “Er, officer, here’s the thing: we’re kind of cross-generational friends, so she’s both my student and, well, my granddaughter.”

“You… you’re sure?”

“Yes, I’m sure,” Professor Ma replied firmly.

“…” The police officer fell silent for a moment, his feelings complicated, then said blandly, “I think you’d better come over as soon as possible.”

After a pause, the officer added, “Yes, and it’s best to bring documentation to prove your identity.”

After speaking, he turned his head to look at Lu Yibei beside him, his expression as dramatic as a soap opera.

He suddenly hoped that the professor was lying, that the stories hadn’t been coordinated by accomplices-what was going on?

If everything he said was true-a male granddaughter and all that…

Ew-! Too messy, too messy, simply unthinkable!

“By the way, officer, can I ask-what did Lu Yibei do?”

“He…” The police officer hesitated for a second, his tone becoming odd. “Uh, he dug up his own grave.”

Professor Ma, “???”

–

Over an hour later, at the Lion Mountain Police Station.

Professor Ma sat on a bench across from the police station’s entrance. For the first time in twenty years, he lit up a cigarette.

He didn’t know what kind of karma had landed him on Lu Yibei’s crazy ship, causing a respected teacher like himself to face such public humiliation.

I spent decades painstakingly building a positive reputation, and now this brat has almost ruined it all, Professor Ma thought heavily.

Recalling his encounter with Lu Yibei in the station earlier, and the bizarre expressions of the police officers who could barely suppress their laughter, Professor Ma couldn’t help but take a deep drag on his cigarette.

Before long, footsteps approached.

Professor Ma looked up to see Lu Yibei walking out of the police station. His face darkened, he flicked the cigarette butt to the ground, rolled up his sleeves, strode over, and gave Lu Yibei a hard slap on the back of the head.

“You little brat, you’ve completely ruined my reputation today! Didn’t you tell me your Nocturnal Syndrome only acts up at night?”

“Hiss-!” Lu Yibei rubbed the back of his head and muttered, “Isn’t today a special case? It’s all because of you, always thinking about your granddaughter, your granddaughter, without even clarifying the situation. You have no idea, when I was inside earlier, those police officers looked at me like they had a stroke, their mouths twitching uncontrollably.”

“…” Professor Ma was momentarily speechless. In this regard, he did bear some responsibility.

“Alright, let’s not talk about this. We’re setting off tomorrow. Why aren’t you at home going over the materials I gave you? What are you doing here in the middle of the night?”

Digging your own grave? Probably only you would do something like that… Professor Ma thought to himself.

“Look, I was just thinking, since we’re going grave robbing, I should familiarize myself with the specific processes first,” Lu Yibei said, throwing out some trash talk.

Professor Ma froze for a moment, surprised. “You already know?”

Lu Yibei, “???”

What do I know!?

Professor, could you stop secretly adding layers of difficulty to things without telling me?

Thinking this, Lu Yibei tentatively asked in a low voice, “So, Professor, are we really going grave robbing? I was just joking, don’t take it seriously!”

Professor Ma shook his head. “Of course not.”

“That’s good, that’s good.” Lu Yibei let out a sigh of relief.

These days, among undiscovered ancient graveyards, seven or eight out of ten are haunted. If they really went “grave robbing,” with his current state of being loaded with debuffs, encountering a haunting would be like serving himself up as experience points.

Just as Lu Yibei was secretly celebrating, Professor Ma suddenly grabbed his shoulders, straightened his back, and said solemnly, “Lu Yibei, this time, besides conducting research projects, we’re also assisting the relevant departments in recovering artifacts that have entered the black market…”

Halfway through, Lu Yibei froze and interrupted, “Wait a minute! Professor, what did you just say? Recovering artifacts?”

Professor Ma nodded. “That’s right. Do you know why our joint research project is starting early? It’s because someone discovered that recently, a large number of artifacts have entered the black market, suspected to have been looted from a large graveyard complex.”

“Professor…” Lu Yibei said bitterly, “Is it still possible for me to back out now? I advise you not to go either.”

Unknown graveyard complexes are already terrifying enough with their hauntings. Grave robbers who manage to bring out a large number of artifacts alive must have psychic energy fluctuation ratings of at least B+.

And certainly not just one-definitely a group.

Thinking about this, the retreat drum in Lu Yibei’s mind was beating thunderously.

“This…” Professor Ma seemed to realize something and lowered his voice. “Does this involve occultism?”

“Mm, mm.” Lu Yibei nodded.

“Is it dangerous?” Professor Ma asked.

With a pale, lifeless expression, Lu Yibei replied seriously, “Extremely dangerous.”

“…”

Then you absolutely have to come along!

Professor Ma fell silent, pondering for a moment. A resolute look flashed in his eyes as he straightened his back and declared, “We must go!”

As he spoke, he looked at Lu Yibei and said seriously, “Lu Yibei, if it’s truly dangerous, I won’t force you to go.”

“But I want to say, those artifacts are treasures of our nation’s culture. If we don’t recover them now, once they’re smuggled overseas, it’ll be much harder to get them back. Do you understand?”

“I understand the reasoning, but Professor…” Lu Yibei nodded, grabbing Professor Ma’s hand and shaking it back and forth, whining, “But I’m scared!”

“Get lost! Shoo! You’re the one making me scared!” Professor Ma shook off Lu Yibei’s hand and moved aside. After thinking for a moment, he decided to change tactics.

Since lofty ideals couldn’t persuade him for now, why not try empathy?

Professor Ma thought, then looked at Lu Yibei and casually asked, “Lu Yibei, earlier inside, the police officer said you were digging your own grave to retrieve a figurine buried there by your ex-girlfriend?”

“Uh… uh? What’s the matter, Professor?”

What kind of trick is this old man trying to pull now? Lu Yibei thought to himself.

“Well then!” Professor Ma nodded. “You know, I’ve heard an interesting analogy before. It said that those artifacts are like the figurines of our ancestors, and grave robbers are like a bunch of bratty kids.”

“Think about it. If a bunch of bratty kids broke into your house, smashed your figurine cabinet, stole the contents, sold them off cheaply, and mislabeled them-like putting a ‘Bai Xiaohua: Rose’ sticker on a ‘001: Camellia’-what would you do?”

“There’s such a thing?” Lu Yibei said fiercely, clenching his fists involuntarily.

The sense of immersion was too strong; he was already starting to get angry.

“Alright, now there’s a chance to deal with those bratty kids. What do you want to do?” Professor Ma raised an eyebrow.

“Of course, go beat them up! Right away! Bratty kids can’t wait to be punished!” Lu Yibei gritted his teeth.

Professor Ma nodded in satisfaction. “No need to rush. We’ll set off the morning after tomorrow.”

Lu Yibei, “???”

“Wait, Professor, you’re tricking me?”

“…” Professor Ma turned away, pretending not to hear him, and said lightly, “Ah, those artifacts… it breaks my heart!”

“…” Lu Yibei stared at Professor Ma’s back, momentarily speechless. Then, as if suddenly realizing something, he exclaimed, “Wait a minute, Professor, how do you know about ‘Bai Xiaohua: Rose’ and ‘001: Camellia’?”

Those are widely recognized as the two most difficult figurines to distinguish, with only some differences in body details. How could the professor know?

“Could it be you’re also a fan of Bai Xiaohua?”

“Cough, cough, cough!”

A violent coughing sound came from afar. Professor Ma staggered, steadied himself, and quickened his pace toward the car parked by the roadside.