My Alleged Husband

Chapter 1295: Chapter 1124: The Happiest Moment

During my lifetime I haven’t been all that happy or joyful, but I know that every single thing I did was truly what I wanted. I have regretted every effort I once made, and I don’t know where the happiest moments in my life have gone. I watched helplessly as what I longed for became what I loathed time and time again. Is that really the ending I desire?

”Wait a moment, can you tell Grandpa, these questions you’re asking tonight about Grandma and Grandpa, who really made you come to ask them? If it’s your father, then go back and tell him, if he doesn’t believe every word we said to him, then don’t come asking us for the reasons anymore. If it was your great-grandfather who chose to have you ask us, then equally tell him that some things can’t be explained in just a few words, and hopefully they won’t stubbornly pursue this matter further. There is no benefit in holding onto it repeatedly.

From your attitude, I can tell that no matter what your Grandma and I do, you don’t see us as part of your family, because our actions have truly disappointed you inside. But did you know how much effort we’ve put in over the years to return to this family? Perhaps others can’t see it, but can you not see it either? Do you not know what I desire? Time and time again, we’ve given so much, for what? We sacrificed everything again and again, is it really just to be hurt by you repeatedly?

I know we did things that let you down in the past, but now I’ve turned over a new leaf. I’ve paid a heavy price for every mistake I made. Why do you still cling to this matter?

As you said, you want a stable and peaceful life. Don’t I want that too? I am also human, with feelings, emotions, desires, wanting to contribute to my family. Have you ever considered what my state of mind might be?

If you were struck down by such blows repeatedly, heard these words from others over and over, and faced suspicion again and again, especially from your own family, who never believe anything you say, how would you feel inside? Would you truly feel okay in your inner world?

We should put ourselves in each other’s shoes and share our feelings honestly, wouldn’t that be better? I know today you shared your true feelings with us, but what about us? Are our hearts not truly bitter? Are we not moved at all inside?

You feel that as parents we are too selfish and, as Grandparents, too inconsiderate of your feelings. What about you? Have the things you’ve done and said considered our dignity? You have belittled our self-esteem time and again. In your eyes, is our pride truly so worthless? I too want a peaceful life, want everyone to live happily together. I want to bring joy to everyone, not leave painful memories with you each time. Why do you have to destroy even this simple request?

Child, no matter what, the blood flowing through you is the same; it’s my blood pressure. The blood flowing in your father is mine, he’s my biological son, and you, you’re his biological son. Doesn’t that mean our blood is the same? Why do you have such thoughts? Why do you consider such thoughts correct? Have you never considered that your thoughts might be wrong? It’s not you right but me who’s being hit repeatedly; I’m part of this family. Do you truly treat us as part of the family with your actions? Perhaps never!”

Xia Jing knew that her husband was truly saddened this time. He never said these words with tears in his eyes before, and today everything he said was sincere from his heart. He had silently harbored them for so many years, never speaking, knowing these words would have no effect even if spoken. Yet now he chose to speak, indicating he’s willing to gamble with his family, wager with the heavens, to see what his family’s intentions truly are. He wants to know how his family can treat him as a member, instead of repeatedly guarding against him, or else returning home will have no meaning.

”Zhentian, what’s wrong with you today? I know you’re feeling uneasy, but there’s no need to say such things to your child. Don’t you know that saying these words will affect your child’s thoughts too? He has also been holding back, having suffered too much over the years, and today he couldn’t help but tell us everything at once, which wasn’t easy for him either. How could you do this?”

”Grandma, actually Grandpa was right in what he said because everything he did was really for the good of this family. Perhaps my actions today were indeed too impulsive!

I didn’t take into account your emotional endurance. All I thought about was what kind of life I wanted for myself inside, forgetting what kind of impact you can bear. Over these years, everyone in my family kept telling me how you abandoned this family back then, so deep down I was repelled by you. Yet I never imagined that my repulsion towards you would eventually lead to this situation. If anything I said led to misunderstandings, or if anything I did today confused you, then I sincerely apologize here. I didn’t do it intentionally!

But I am really grateful to you if it wasn’t for you I wouldn’t have had this chance to express my true feelings. These words have been buried in my heart, accumulating day by day as I grew, and I never dared to confide in others, much less go to my own parents.

Because mentioning you to them would make them hesitant deep down; I know they are just as hurt, so I dared not bring up my grandparents in front of them and didn’t dare to speak or ask about you. But today I asked you everything from the depths of my heart face to face, and I felt truly happy and relieved inside.

I never imagined that one day I could live so openly, to ask all the questions from deep inside. That feeling is truly satisfying!”

Perhaps the happiest and most joyful moment of my life is the moment when the family is reunited. Even if that time is but a fleeting moment, like a shooting star, it is the happiest time of my life!