Naruto : Venom

”He’s worse.” Kakashi morbidly confirms. ”Enough about that. We’ve got to get MY STUDENT WHO DOESN’T LISTEN TO HIS SENSEI down here.”

Hm, I think he’s slightly angry with me right now. Oh well, not like I’ve had worse happen.

...

”So we’re playing the passive aggressive game now?” I cheekily sass my former sensei. ”Well I suppose if my sensei did order me to go down I would go down, but Orochimaru isn’t here.”

Ouch. I should not have said that, that was a low blow even by my standards.

”HAHAHA!” Anko doubles over in laughter. ”Ino are you sure he’s not gay?”

”Alvarcus. Seriously. Phrasing.” Naruto hangs his head in shame. ”Whenever we’re together you say something like that. You’ve got to stop.”

Alrighty then, guess no one else took that seriously? That’s for the best.

”Alvarcus get down here or I will tell them about when I used a Forbidden Taijutsu Technique on you.” Kakashi threatens me with a tinge of victory on his features. He’s talking about the Thousand Year of Death.

If it is war you want, war you shall have.

”Go for it puppet man.” I wiggle my fingers at him like a puppet master. ”I’ve got my own stories about you I can share.”

”You’re never going to let me forget about that, are you?” Kakashi backs off that tactic.

”Are you going to let me forget about it?” I quip back to him. ”Pretty sure mine’s worse.”

”I’m a jounin. Jounin should never have that happen to them.” Kakashi twitches in disgust. ”Not to mention half of it was my own fault.”

”I know what I’m bugging you about from now on.” Anko grins deviously. ”Puppet man? What could that mean? I’ve got to know!”

”Great. Now this has happened.” Kakashi groans out. ”This is going to be a long mission.”

”How the hell do you think I feel?” I share a brief moment of mutual pain with my former sensei.

”Okay, this is stopping now.” Ino speaks up. ”I’ve wasted enough damn time out here! I want to go back inside! Alvarcus Mar you have until the count of three or I will punish you.”

”We’re doing this now?” I look down at Ino. She looks pissed. ”It didn’t work on me before, what’s changed?”

”I know how to punish you this time. The first time I didn’t have anything prepared.” Ino wrathfully grins at me. ”One.”

”Really?” I sigh in boredom as I plant an elbow on the railing and hold my head in my hand. My posture screams uninterested. ”Been through this before.”

”Two.” Her grin widens.

”Do you really think that you can intimidate me like this? Ino I do shit like this all the time and my version is way better than yours. Hell I convinced a group of eight highly trained shinobi to surrender because they didn’t want to fight a Mad King!”

”The hell is he talking about?” Naruto asks himself but I don’t feel like elaborating.

”Three.” Ino confidently says. ”Now it’s punishment time.”

”I can take it.” I sigh out in boredom again. ”But maybe don’t try to invade my mind? That didn’t end well for either of us.”

”So everyone,” Ino sends me a smirk one last time. ”Does the name Midori mean anything to you?”

”I’M DOWN!” I leap over the railing and start to fall the relatively short distance to the deck. ”I’M DOWN I’M DOWN I’M DOWN!”

”Woah.” Shikamaru’s eyes widen. ”That was fast.”

”That goes doubly for him, he doesn’t like heights.” Naruto is just as caught off guard as Shikamaru. ”Who is Midori?”

”Don’t tell them!” I scamper over to Ino and take one of her hands in both of mine. ”I’ll never live it down! Please!”

”I counted to three. You need to be punished.” Ino smiles sweetly at me. ”This is your fault. You should have listened to me when I gave you a chance.”

”Not that! Anything but that! What do you want?” I’m begging her without a hint of shame and she’s loving every moment of it. She likes that she has a form of power over me, that the one who always manages to get away or avoid her is finally at her mercy.

”I don’t know, you better offer me something very good.” She tenderly pats my cheek. ”If your offer isn’t up to my standards then they’ll learn all about Midori.”

”Seriously who is Midori?” Naruto asks again.

”OH! OH!” Anko giddily calls out. ”Offer to be her personal heater!”

”Yes! That!” I quickly agree. ”Personal heater! Heat on demand! Whenever you want!”

”Hmm…” Ino ponders it for a moment. She’s balancing it on a scale in her mind, then she comes to a decision. ”Nope! Not good enough! So Midori is-”

”AND CLOTHES!” I blurt out. I will not let any more people know about Midori! Too many know the way it is! ”Clothes of the highest quality you’ve ever seen! Elegant ballroom dresses, the most comfortable silk pajamas you’ve ever dreamed of, and more! I’ll even get them custom made just for you! Whatever you want I assure you I can provide!”

”Really?” Ino’s pupils dilate and it’s her turn to take both of my hands in her own. ”You’d do that for me? As much as I want?”

We would look adorable right now except for the fact that I’m full of desperation and she’s giggling like a perverted schoolgirl at the prospect of clothes.

”Yes! Just drop Midori forever! Never bring her up again!” I beg her. I want that piece of my past buried forever. Never to see the light of day again.

”Oi.” Anko buts in. ”None of these clothes can have fasteners of any sort! I will not have my student regressing and slacking off! She won’t be forgetting one of the most important things I’ve taught her!”

”Only those that are designed to close like that.” Ino adds with stars in her eyes. ”I don’t want a t shirt or a dress cut down the middle but any jacket or coat I get that’s just fine!”

”Done!” I’m so glad that’s over with.

”Who the fuck is Midori?” Naruto shouts out.

”Doesn’t matter.” Ino loops her arm around mine. ”You and I will be spending a lot of time together, there are so many clothes I’ve always wanted and you said you’d get me whatever I want!”

”Yes of course!” I submit to Ino. Who knew, the girl can be scary when she wants to.

Ino merrily leads me over to the interior of the ship so we can talk business.

”Uh…” Shikamaru points in the opposite direction Ino and I are walking. ”We’ve still got to meet with the client. She’s that way.”

”Oh. Right.” Ino sheepishly smiles at the rest of the dumbstruck group. ”Alvarcus we’ll talk business later. Mission first.”

She spins us around and starts walking the both of us in the other direction.

”You’re not going to let go of him?” Kakashi says with just a touch of… approval? It doesn’t seem like he’s approving of Ino manipulating me but rather that she hasn’t let go of me.

That’s weird. Why would he approve of that? Oh well, it’s not important.

”I finally have him trapped.” Ino tightens the link between our arms. ”He’s not getting away that easily again. Come on Alvarcus, we’re going to make this meeting snappy. We have more important things to do.”

”Yes Ma’am.” I continue to submit to her and let her steer me to where the client is supposed to be waiting.

”Right. So. That happened.” Naruto says in shock. ”That did happen right?”

”I think so?” Shikamaru says in disbelief. ”Ino cuffed Alvarcus. Alvarcus. You know, the A-rank missing nin that literally attacked us yesterday?”

”He’s A-rank?” Naruto looks towards where I disappeared to. ”That’s so cool! I wanna be A-rank!”

”And like that we’ve lost Naruto.” Shikamaru sighs. ”Can we just go meet with the client now? This was too eventful. Way too eventful. I hope the entire mission isn’t this way.”

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