The Trash Returned from Warhammer

”Remember, this isn’t a date. It’s just that I’m too beautiful, so I need a bodyguard, that’s all.

See? This is your function. Not a single person is even blocking the way.

Hey, I’m talking to you! Can’t you give me some kind of reaction?”

Shinji walked through the crowd, surrounded by the aroma of food. Passersby instinctively gave way under his invisible aura. Before him was Asuka, chattering away with her explanations.

’Interesting. You’re clearly the one who begged me to come.’

He pursed his lips. He had been on duty when Asuka suddenly jumped out in front of him, maintaining her usual haughty attitude, claiming she was hungry and demanding he accompany her to get food.

Shinji wasn’t about to spoil her; he immediately called over a boy to run the errand for her. In the end, Asuka stubbornly refused and tightly grabbed his hand. Her expression then was quite a sight—anger, grievance, pride, and entreaty. He had never seen such a rich array of emotions on a single person’s face.

Mhm, just like right now.

Asuka turned her head, gritting her teeth, her face flushed red. She puffed out her cheeks like a pufferfish, as if saying: Don’t make me beg you.

’Pride truly is a double-edged sword’ Shinji thought.

’She’s clearly pleading, yet she simply can’t open her mouth. Forget it, she’s only fourteen; why should I hold it against her?’

”As a bodyguard, silence and focus are the most professional attitudes. I must remain alert to any source of threat.”

’Who asked you to actually act like a bodyguard! I just want to go on a date with you! Why are you so stubborn!’

Asuka felt a metallic sweetness in her throat, a mouthful of blood suppressed behind her teeth: ”You really are a blockhead!”

”Don’t use such weak and powerless adjectives. Call me ’Steel’.”

”Tsk!”

Asuka’s footsteps faltered; she almost fainted from exasperation. She turned around hatefully and strode forward, only able to roar in her heart.

’I must be out of my mind to run out here with him. Ugh, why did I get so hot-headed and go looking for trouble?’

Just ten minutes ago, she had overheard the conversation between Rei Ayanami and the others in the next room—something about dates, about bonfire confessions...

As a Disciplinary Committee member, she had to resolutely resist all ”impure relationships.” At that moment, her blood surged, and without a second thought, she went straight to find Shinji. Asuka was a woman of action once she made up her mind; she went up and invited Shinji to stroll around the school.

However, right now, her heart was full of regret.

”Wait.”

”Hmph, what orders does the ’Steel’ Lord Shinji have...”

Asuka turned around, but the rest of her sentence got stuck in her throat. She saw a box of takoyaki held out before her eyes. ”If you’re apologizing now, it—it’s already too late.”

”Then consider it my apology for a few days ago. I shouldn’t have dodged back then.”

Shinji’s gaze was serious. Seeing the girl freeze, he shook his hand slightly.

”Eat. Weren’t you hungry? Not eating? Then I’ll eat it.”

”Hmph, at least you know your place!”

Asuka snatched the box away, picking up a toothpick and stuffing them into her mouth. ”The taste is so-so, and the portion is tiny.”

Hearing her emphasize the word ”portion,” Shinji simply nodded.

”Fine. Then we’ll eat our way down this street.”

”You’re treating! Until I’m satisfied, your apology hasn’t succeeded.”

Unreasonable pestering was Asuka’s style. Shinji didn’t bother preaching; he simply followed behind. Then, as usual, the girl’s mood quickly improved.

A smile appeared on her previously huffy face. She curiously tasted every kind of Japanese snack, her fiery red dress swaying—an energy that seemed ready to overflow.

Shinji kept his word and acted solely as a mobile wallet until Asuka stood holding a candy apple with a look of difficulty.

”Don’t binge eat. You’re already full.”

Shinji took the candy apple from her hand and took a bite.

’Crispy, sweet, good texture.’

He enjoyed the high-quality food of this world. Seeing Asuka’s reddened face, he looked at the spot on the candy apple where she had bitten.

”You don’t have a contagious disease; I don’t mind.”

’But I mind! Isn’t this an indirect kiss?!’

Asuka swallowed those words. She had long known that Shinji had an unusual obsession with cherishing food. She glanced at the remaining few stalls and suppressed a burp.

”But it’s still early. Are we going back now?”

Her expression dimmed.

’Didn’t I eat this much just to stall for time? It’s all this idiot’s fault for giving the money so readily that I couldn’t stop.’

Shinji didn’t realize he was being blamed again. He checked his watch.

”No rush. Since you’ve eaten enough, let’s stroll around. I want to see the activities of the other clubs as well.”

’Hell yeah!’

Asuka suppressed the upward curve of her lips and waved her hand calmly: ”Fine, then this lady will reluctantly accompany you.”

”Are you sure you’re ’accompanying’ me?”

With that counter-question, Asuka panicked on the spot. She knew this idiot’s temper too well; later on, it really would turn into an ”inspection,” bearing no resemblance to a legendary date.

”Then... then you accompany me? Consider it your second apology! Ahhh, whatever! Just come with me!”

Without leaving room for argument, a frantic Asuka grabbed Shinji’s hand and pulled him toward the places she liked. This time she was prepared; she had even made a guide in advance.

The first stop was the Handicraft Club’s stall, but Shinji’s gaze had already been drawn to the deadlift competition at the Fitness Club next door. After Asuka realized her meaningful glances were ineffective, her emotional intelligence rarely took the high ground.

”Want to participate? Fine. But you must accompany me after you’re done. It’s a fair trade.”

”Deal.”

Shinji nodded. He originally had no interest in handicrafts and was thinking of refusing, but Asuka had beaten him to it.

’Hmph, I knew a blockhead like you would be attracted. I specifically asked the Student Council to put those muscle-brains next door.’

Shinji strode over to enter the competition. He immediately requested 120kg, causing a wave of astonishment. Then, amidst Asuka’s cheering and shouting, he lifted it easily, doing 10 reps in a row.

The youth wasn’t particularly tall or massive, but with every exertion, his muscles strained against his white shirt as if the buttons might burst at any moment. His arms were as solid as steel. Every time the barbell was lowered and raised, it made a heavy thud-thud-thud sound, making many girls’ eyes glaze over.

”The champion, Ikari Shinji.”

Following the club president’s exclamation, Shinji put the weight down, still wanting more. This was already the limit of this 14-year-old body; going any further would require using psychic power, which would be meaningless.

However, the title of ”Champion” made every pore of his body open up with satisfaction.

”You idiot, why are you so strong?”

Asuka circled Shinji like a little bird, feeling his arm and poking his thigh, which felt as hard as rock.

”It comes from daily training. Every drop of sweat will not betray you.”

Shinji shook the protein powder prize in his hand, shaking his head with some dissatisfaction: ”I have degenerated to the point of being weak. Before, basic movements like the deadlift were calculated in tons.”

’Braggart! A ton would crush you to death!’

Asuka wrinkled her nose, revealing a smile that said her plan had succeeded: ”Now it’s your turn to accompany me. No backing out.”

”Fine.”

Perhaps due to the pleasure brought by the championship, Shinji was very agreeable this time. He looked ahead and understood instantly.

The Handicraft Club’s activity was making DIY dolls. Looking at Asuka’s sly expression—resembling a blue-skinned swindler possessed—he knew she was up to no good.

”You want me to accompany you that badly?”

”Nonsense! I just happen to have some interest in this kind of craft. You aren’t going to back out, are you?”

”An Astartes keeps his word. Come help.”

They received materials from the club members and sat on small stools to slowly cut them. Perhaps because this game required too much patience, the stall was deserted; it was as if they had booked the whole place.

’This idiot really knows how to do everything.’

Asuka tilted her head, staring blankly at the youth. She watched the scissors fly nimbly up and down in his hands, cutting fabric and threading needles, his profile full of focus.

’Not only is he all-powerful, but if you look closely, he’s actually quite handsome. How did he end up with such a weird temper?’

Shinji was indeed good-looking. Before his muscles bulged, he had quite the look of a ”pretty boy.” Combined with that steady aura, his appearance far exceeded that of ordinary people.

’Then again, if it wasn’t for this weird temper, I wouldn’t be interested. Could it be that I really have a masochistic personality like Chihaya said?’

”Why are you looking at me? This is a game of teamwork and coordination. The mission is to create the most perfect work within the allotted time.”

Shinji didn’t even look up, reminding her while he sewed.

Asuka quickly snapped out of it, clumsily cutting the fabric. ”It’s just the two of us; who are we competing against?”

”Championship is a pursuit, not a comparison with others.”

Shinji implemented his philosophy in every detail. He glanced at Asuka, then leaned in directly, grabbing her hand. ”Clumsy. The scissors should be used like this so you won’t leave frayed edges.”

’Who are you calling clumsy!’

Asuka’s eyes widened, but when Shinji gripped her hand, guiding her carefully—feeling the man’s embrace and hearing his steady breathing—her little head dipped, her hanging hair hiding her reddening face.

”Ignorant. You can’t even thread a needle. Give me your hand.”

”Stupid. Why is the seam line crooked? Lean over this way, I’ll sew it into a straight line for you.”

”Beyond saving. You didn’t even ask what kind of doll I wanted to make; how can you just sew blindly? We are making a dog-shaped doll, 35cm high and 15cm at the shoulders.”

”Why a dog? Since you didn’t speak, of course I decided. I’ve never seen such a foolish recruit. Can’t determine the dimensions? Go get a ruler!”

The process was not smooth. This was Asuka’s clumsiest moment and the time Shinji scolded her the most. But what was most unusual was that from beginning to end, Asuka didn’t resist once. She was like a doll herself, silently being led by Shinji, her head bowed without a word.

Her arrogance had vanished, replaced only by tenderness.

”Finally finished.”

Half an hour later, Shinji put down the scissors, looking at his work with satisfaction. It was an orange-red stuffed dog with neat seams and a perfect shape, similar to those sold in doll shops. He had even thoughtfully added a scar on the dog’s left cheek as a decoration.

’If we didn’t finish, the anger would have affected my lifespan. I didn’t expect Asuka to be this clumsy.’

He turned to look at the girl, raising an eyebrow: ”You were not in the right state, your mind was restless. You are not suited for work that requires patience and detail.”

’You were holding me the whole time, how could I be calm?!’

Asuka still didn’t glare. she was savoring the feeling from just now, pulling the doll into her arms.

”Nonsense! We clearly did a good job. It’s just that this dog looks kind of fierce. And what’s with the scar on its face?”

”I was responsible for over 95% of the work,” Shinji corrected. Watching the girl hold the doll, he suddenly understood where the inspiration had come from.

’Isn’t this just like you? Baring your teeth, defending everything like a hedgehog just to protect the trauma in your heart.’

”Forget it, it’s yours. But did you get this idea from learning from Rei?”

’Hmph hmph hmph, exactly. Let’s see if she dares to show off in front of me again.’

Asuka tilted her head up proudly. She thought about how that ”idiot” always showed off her cat doll to her, saying it was a personal gift from Ikari-kun. Now she had one too, and he made it with his own hands.

Admitting it was impossible. She simply hugged the doll tightly, looking as if she wouldn’t give it up to anyone.

”Next, let’s go to the Photography Club. They have all sorts of ways to take photos over there.”

She skipped the question entirely, grabbing Shinji’s hand, only to find she couldn’t budge him.

”It’s about time. Aren’t you going to the joint practice?”

”Oh, it doesn’t matter if we go a bit later! This is giving you a chance to accompany this lady. You should feel honored.”

Asuka looked like she hadn’t had enough. She couldn’t care less about any band rehearsal; she was going to monopolize this guy today.

But soon, her smile froze on her face. A girl with icy blue hair stood not far away, staring at her expressionlessly. Her crimson eyes conveyed the most direct message:

’Asuka, I’ve endured you for a long time.’

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