The Trash Returned from Warhammer

”Phew, see? I told you there wouldn’t be a problem.”

Watching Unit-01 hold the Angel aloft as if it were a sheet of paper, Misato Katsuragi flopped back into her chair, tugging at her collar to breathe more easily.

The scene was surreal. Moments ago, this Angel—a creature that had effortlessly broken through nuclear barrages, N2 bombs, and a dense anti-air net—had been plunging from outer space at Mach 20, with a momentum capable of crushing mountains and sinking the Japanese archipelago. Yet, such a powerful Angel had been dispatched in an instant.

Misato took several deep breaths, a confident and relaxed smile returning to her face. She pointed at the steel giant on the screen. ”It looked dangerous, but it was all in Shinji’s calculations. See? How easily he won.”

’Who was it that was screaming a blood-curdling shriek just moments ago, cowering on the floor with their head in their hands? Oh, and didn’t someone cry for their daddy?’

Ritsuko wanted to call her out, but catching a glimpse of her own trembling hands, she decided against it.

’Heh, don’t play the pot calling the kettle black; I was having flashbacks too.’

It was a thrilling miracle. She couldn’t understand why the Angel had voluntarily decelerated and rushed toward Unit-01. It could have just landed on the ground; why choose a path that led directly to its own destruction?

’Was there something that attracted the Angel? Something that made its mission to destroy Tokyo-3 take a backseat?’

She pondered for a moment, feeling like she had caught a lead, before a new thought diverted her attention.

’As fellow pilots, the gap in power is astronomical.’

Usually, there was no direct comparison, but this time the difference was like heaven and earth. The weakened Sahaquiel could have crushed Unit-02 in seconds, yet Unit-01 had forcibly pushed it back.

’I used to think Shinji-kun was a monster, but is he still growing?’

Ritsuko felt a sudden surge of fear. The insane notion of a single person fighting an Angel—and perhaps the whole world—seemed to be becoming reality. Instinctively, she looked back. True enough, the Commander’s seat was empty.

’Those old men must be panicking now. Shinji Ikari was never someone they could manipulate at will, and yet they can’t do without him—NERV would have been wiped out several times over by now.

There are seven Angels left. You must be having a miserable time, truly.’

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[Angel: Silent.]

Hearing the report that sounded like survivors gasping after a catastrophe, Shinji sat upright, unmoved. Everything was going according to plan, including the aftermath.

He glanced at the password-locked case that had been resealed. He had already neutralized one old man; SEELE must be getting anxious. They were waiting to slaughter the donkey once the millstone was no longer needed after all the Angels were defeated, but he didn’t have that much patience.

Shinji was never afraid of SEELE making moves. Every time they caused trouble, they served up a batch of delicious tributes to be used as materials for the final resolution. It was their ”idling and ghosting” that was the most troublesome; he didn’t have the time or energy to travel the world to chat with them offline.

”Good work, everyone.” Shinji said flatly, not caring how many billions had been spent in this battle.

”That final blow was beautiful, Shinji-kun.” Rei said softly. Seeing the ”SOUND ONLY” pattern, she quietly curved her lips. ”Asuka, why aren’t you speaking? Don’t tell me you’re crying.”

”Nonsense! I—I’m just tired, that’s all.”

Asuka hugged her knees, curled up in the cockpit, teeth gritting in pain. But it was the psychological impact that stung more. When Unit-02 and Unit-01 lifted the exact same object, she realized the sheer scale of the gap between them. It was the most visceral comparison; if she wasn’t used to it, she might have had a mental breakdown on the spot.

It was a dimensional difference—like a baby wrestling a world champion. Any refusal to accept this felt infantile and ridiculous.

Shinji realized this too, but he now possessed a ”holy relic” for dealing with Asuka: the ”Praise Strategy.”

”You bought me the time I needed to finish the Angel. Asuka, your courage exceeded my imagination.”

”I don’t need your pity.” The girl tilted her chin, refusing to accept it.

”I only ever speak the truth. You could have stayed in a safe position and fired from your rifle, but instead, you drew your combat knife and charged. That level of courage is beyond the ordinary.”

Shinji touched his cheek.

’It’s a world wonder that someone can be angry even after being praised.’

His deep, reliable tone caught the frustrated Asuka off guard. She pondered it for a second.

’Wait, maybe I do deserve to be praised. I really did contribute.’

”R-really? Is it that important?”

”Absolutely. You play online games, don’t you? You know RPGs have role assignments—some are meant to be warriors to pull aggro, some are meant to be mages for damage output—but it’s all to defeat the boss.” Shinji struggled through the explanation; it was hard to praise people, and he had finally found a metaphor Asuka could understand.

’Different roles, same result?’

Right. He praised me, so he definitely doesn’t look down on me.

Asuka’s eyes darted around, and her tone returned to her arrogant, haughty self.

”W-well, obviously! Who do you think this Young Lady is? If it were that idiot Ayanami, she probably wouldn’t have dared to get underneath the Angel. I did it without even thinking. That is my courage.”

”And I wonder who was screaming in the comms? I recorded it. Do you want to hear it?” A cold voice interjected suddenly.

”Delete it! Hurry up and delete it! Otherwise, I’ll expose your dark history!”

”What dark history could I possibly have?”

”I found that stack of borrowed discs you have! There’s an ’18+’ label on them!”

”What is that?”

Shinji rubbed his ears. Those two were back to their daily bickering. His intuition told him not to join either side, so he simply leaned back in his seat.

’Another survival crisis resolved.’

He watched the PDF troops—survivors who were hugging each other—and revealed a satisfied smile.

The crises of this world came without warning, but they ended just as quickly. Just imagining it, he found himself looking forward to the ordinary days ahead.

’The Emperor is on his throne. Is this Your mercy?’

If that guy Angelos knew about his life, he’d probably be envious. To have both glory and peace, with ample rest between battles—for a normal Astartes, this was paradise.

”Looks like the School Festival can proceed as planned.”

Hm?

Rei and Asuka stopped arguing, both surprised, as Shinji had never brought up school life after a battle before.

”Hey, don’t you usually make us summarize our performance at this point?”

”A good reminder, Asuka. In that case, let’s begin our post-battle summary, starting with this new internal power supply.”

”Ah? I didn’t say anything just now~” Asuka tapped her head and stuck out her tongue, trying to play cute to get out of it, but it was too late.

When Misato Katsuragi arrived with the logistics team, she saw Asuka sitting on the ground, dejected. Her vacant eyes looked as if countless lines of code were scrolling through them; she wasn’t jumping out to steal the spotlight like usual.

The composition was strange: the massive Angel lay on the ground, covering a large stretch of shattered earth. Two blood-stained steel giants stood solemnly to the side. At their feet sat the dejected girl and the boy quietly eating a cracker.

”What’s wrong with Asuka again?” Misato pinched her nose as she walked over.

’How can you eat in an environment like this?’

”I gave her a detailed tactical analysis and a combat simulation regarding the new internal power supply.”

”But she usually just thinks you’re being nagging.”

”Perhaps this time she’s reaping what she sowed.”

Shinji glanced at the girl, feeling a surge of satisfaction. He suddenly became alert.

”Where’s Rei?”

”Unit-00 was transported back to HQ early. Don’t tell me you’re planning to drag her over for a lecture too? Wait, you are thinking that, aren’t you?” Misato clutched her head, thinking the guy was a walking stress-factory. She whispered:

”You could deepen your ’praise tactics’ a bit more. Remember the hot springs last time? After someone is exhausted, they should be rewarded.”

Whenever the word ”tactics” was mentioned, Shinji became exceptionally serious. His eyes flickered.

”Why do I feel like you’re corrupting me?”

’Damn it, if I don’t say that, how will you ever learn to handle a girl’s heart? It’s truly amazing how you turn being with girls into a tactical exercise.’

”Cough, cough. We fought a victorious battle, yet the hero looks all depressed. That’s not glorious.” Whenever ”glory” was mentioned, Shinji became solemn. He felt that the dejected Asuka was indeed a bit unreasonable.

”Do you have any suggestions?”

”Isn’t First Municipal Middle School planning to hold the School Festival? But the order for residents to return is set for two weeks from now. That’s a real delay.”

”Then send the relevant personnel from First Municipal back first.”

”Yes, Shinji-sama. This subordinate will convey your orders immediately.” Misato snapped a salute, turned, and sprinted away, not forgetting to wink at Asuka, who was suddenly beaming.

’Sure enough, she had an ulterior motive.’

Shinji had been played. He assumed Rei Ayanami was involved too. He turned his head and saw Asuka wiggling her fingers, saying in a robotic tone:

”An Astartes never lies to their battle-brother; this is the oath of honesty. The burdens of the seven continents and five oceans rest on Shinji-sama’s shoulders; you can’t go back on your word.”

’Fine. I said so much, and that’s the only part you remembered.’

”Are you used to it yet?”

”Ah? Oh, you mean this? I wasn’t used to it at first, but now that I can be a hero without it interfering with my play-time, honestly, I quite like this rhythm of life.” Asuka sat on Unit-02’s finger, swinging her feet. The beautiful girl and the gargantuan robot formed a picture of their own.

”Like it? You were just screaming in terror a moment ago, telling me to issue orders immediately.”

”Ich habe Angst (I was scared).” Asuka muttered, then jumped over, shouting, ”You heard that wrong! Delete that memory immediately!”

Shinji dodged lightly. Asuka let out a cry as she dove face-first into a pool of blood, landing in the muck. She sat up, looking at the foul, fishy-smelling blood, and then leaped up like a cat whose fur had been ruffled.

Watching Asuka’s negative emotions skyrocket, Shinji took two steps back.

’Funny thing—I’ve gotten used to that too.’

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”Fuyutsuki, we’re in trouble.”

Gendo Ikari stood before the floor-to-ceiling window. There was no excitement on his face after the great victory; instead, he looked rather nervous.

No one was an idiot. The final trajectory change of the Tenth Angel had a sense of ”deliberately walking into a trap.” It could have easily struck the ground and released its terrifying kinetic energy. According to the MAGI’s calculations, the entire Tokyo-3 would have been wiped out, and 70% of the underground HQ would have been destroyed. In other words, standing here, he would have been reduced to dust.

Gendo didn’t indulge in the joy of surviving. He had discovered another problem.

”Yes. SEELE will find out. For a long time, NERV has been infiltrated like a sieve. Usually, we could just modify the data.” Fuyutsuki’s tone was heavy. He laughed bitterly, ”This is the result of a chain of problems. We barely passed the test; what are we to do this time?”

Gendo’s fists clenched. He had become numb to being screwed over by that boy. He had exhausted all his mental energy barely surviving the Ninth Angel’s trial—how long had he even rested before this massive incident occurred?

’Is he the hero who saves the world, enjoying all the glory? While I have to bear all the blame?’

”Did Ritsuko find the cause?”

”No. All detectors are normal. No second Angel signal was detected. She went to recover Unit-01 herself, hoping to find a clue.”

’Again.’

Gendo closed his eyes. Not only did he have to bear the blame, but he couldn’t even find any leverage. He simply couldn’t comprehend how this was achieved.

The two waited in silence. After half an hour, Fuyutsuki picked up the phone. After exchanging a few words, he wore a strange expression.

”Ritsuko replied. Unit-01 is fine, and Shinji-kun wasn’t carrying anything extra.”

”Then tell me: why did Sahaquiel walk into a trap?”

”I don’t know. More investigation is needed.”

More unknowns.

Gendo had never felt so powerless. Whenever the subject involved Unit-01, Ritsuko Akagi acted like an incompetent fool. She couldn’t find a problem from the start; she was useless. As for Shinji, he admitted the boy was strong, but he couldn’t have brought and taken away the Adam embryo under strict surveillance—was he a god-tier thief?

”Stop investigating. We need to find a way to deal with SEELE’s upcoming interrogation.”

”Without knowing the cause, how can we face the interrogation? Those old men will suspect that you borrowed the Spear of Longinus and used the Adam embryo as bait to make the Angel walk into a trap.” Fuyutsuki countered. It was an unsolvable problem.

”Go meet with Shinji-kun again. Only he knows the reason.”

”And get humiliated by him again!?”

Gendo turned his head. His face showed a degree of irritability and self-doubt that had never appeared before. The scene of being lifted by one hand was like a nightmare he couldn’t shake from his mind.

However, seeing Fuyutsuki’s stunned expression, he forced himself to calm down.

”Sorry.”

”It’s fine. But Gendo, you’ve been acting strangely lately. What on earth is going on?”

Gendo paused. He realized he was acting strangely. He had lost his former confidence, and he was becoming indecisive. Yet, no matter how he looked at it, his own thoughts hadn’t been interfered with.

”That’s not important. I have to make a choice. If I’m not mistaken, SEELE will use hardline tactics this time; it won’t be so easy to get off the hook.”

”Coming directly for you and me?” Fuyutsuki frowned. Smart as they were, they were still ordinary humans; they couldn’t withstand those drugs.

”So, are we flipping the table?”

”It’s only the Tenth Angel. How can I flip the table? Do you think SEELE prepared so many EVAs just to fight Angels?” Gendo’s brows were locked tight. After a moment of hesitation, he finally made a decision.

”I need time. I can only mislead SEELE. Listen carefully.”

He began to explain his plan. He saw the shock, confusion, anger, and disdain on Fuyutsuki’s face.

These expressions were like blades stabbing deep into his heart. Even as hard as steel, he couldn’t help but waver. Following that came a wave of powerlessness and rage.

’Shinji Ikari, look at the good deed you’ve done!’

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