Return of the Antagonistic Lady Boss

Chapter 1008: Chapter 981: None of This Has Anything to Do With You

When Yu Mingxi heard the alcohol percentage, only two huge words floated across her mind.

Damn!

Chen Xiaoqian screwed her over again!

After Qian finished reporting the alcohol content, she didn’t bother listening to whatever Yu Minglang was roaring on the other end—Erha Qiang was probably pretty pissed, but he was so far away that any settling of accounts would have to wait till the second half of the night. For the first half, Qian still had a ”program” to run.

This program was called: Drunk Confessions!

Qian walked over and sat down next to Yu Mingxi. Yu Mingxi pressed her fingers to her temples, feeling the sky spin and her stomach churning like hell.

”Look at me. Who am I?” Qian held Yu Mingxi’s shoulders and asked.

”I’m your freaking uncle!” Yu Mingxi’s tongue was all twisted. Her brain was lagging half a beat now, but she did know the brat in front of her had set her up.

”Mm-hmm, right, you are my uncle. Uncle, lemme ask you a few questions, yeah?”

”Okay—no, wait, you, you’re Chen Xiaoqian. I don’t tell Chen Xiaoqian the truth.”

Drunk Xiaoxi was actually kind of adorable. Her little face was flushed red, the usual cool older-sis vibe gone, replaced by pure goofiness. Qian fought back the urge to poke her cheeks and bully her, and said very solemnly,

”I’m not Chen Xiaoqian, I’m your uncle.”

”Oh, hello Uncle—no, that’s wrong! I’m the uncle. Wait, I’m a girl...” The generational titles were getting messy. Yu Mingxi did a quick little reset, slapped her own head, then giggled.

”I’m your aunt!”

”Mm, hello Auntie. Auntie, tell me some stuff, yeah...”

So this is what Yu Mingxi’s like when she’s drunk, huh. Way cuter than usual. Qian, being evil, decided that from now on she should drink more with her big sis-in-law.

But right now, she had to launch Q&A mode. Dealing with someone like Yu Mingxi, who has super thick defenses and hates cooperating, she didn’t even need to use any professional techniques—just add alcohol and everything’s easy to ask.

When Yu Minglang rushed over, he honestly couldn’t believe what he was seeing.

His big sister had her arm around Qian’s neck, Qian’s face was covered in lipstick marks, all from Yu Mingxi gnawing on her. The two crazy women, hair all over the place, were belting out a song.

”What the hell did you do!!!”

Yu Minglang was heartbroken and furious. This woman reeking of booze, smeared with lipstick, clothes all rumpled, singing and staggering around—was this really his wife?

”Psychological treatment, okay? Right, Auntie?”

”Right! My dear niece! Our journey is the sea of stars! Come on, let’s kick off that glorious Age of Discovery. The red flag flutters in the wind, our voices ring so bright! Guard the oceans, confidence strong!”

The demonic singing was drilling straight into his skull! Yu Minglang seriously wanted to record this and send it to all the major satellite channels—then this dumbass Yu Mingxi would never live it down. This was way too outrageous!

”Qiang, my dear Qiang! We can’t lose to Auntie. Hit her with ’We Workers Have Power’! No, wait, you’re not a worker, what are you again? Right—’Forward, forward, forward, our ranks march toward the sun!’”

”What kind of hot mess is this? Move, come with me, now!”

Yu Minglang went over to support Qian, only for Qian to fling his hand off. ”Don’t touch me, I can walk by myself! Auntie, let’s go find another place to keep the party going!”

”Party my ass!” Even mild-tempered Xiaoqiang was ready to explode. What husband wants to see his wife drunk like a stupid cat?

”Don’t talk nonsense! I’m her aunt, her uncle is Hai Zhao. How can you curse Hai Zhao!”

Damn!!!

Yu Minglang was about ready to puke blood. ”Yu Mingxi, open those cat eyes of yours and look properly. Who am I!”

Seriously, in the span of one day he got downgraded a whole generation? What the hell had his wife done to Yu Mingxi to turn her into this total idiot?!

”I don’t care who you are. Be whoever the hell you want! None of you have anything to do with me, you’re all just digging your own graves!”

Before Yu Minglang arrived, Qian had spent a solid half hour doing intensive brainwashing on Yu Mingxi, and the results were instant.

”Right, whoever the hell you want! They’re all digging their own graves, not a damn thing to do with you!”

Qian echoed, shared a brotherly-sisterly gaze with Yu Mingxi, and the two women started singing again.

”West Lake scenery~”

”In the March spring~”

Yu Minglang couldn’t take it anymore. He slapped away the demonic hand reaching for his wife, then hoisted Qian over his shoulder in a classic ”carrying pork” pose. Qian was hanging head-down, feeling awful, kicked him with her feet, and got warned.

”I kept everything Mai gave me!” Behave if you don’t want to get punished!

Sure enough, Qian went quiet.

Boiling mad, Yu Minglang one-handedly fished out his phone. He was about to call his big brother to come haul off the remaining drunk when Qian said in a surprisingly clear voice,

”Call Hai Zhao.”

”You’re not drunk?” Hearing a voice totally different from the gibberish earlier, Yu Minglang asked suspiciously.

”Please, you think my tolerance can be taken down by a few drinks like that? Quit dilly-dallying, call Hai Zhao! This is treatment!”

Yu Minglang had no clue what kind of therapy Qian was running, but he still did as told and called Hai Zhao. Hai Zhao showed up in under five minutes—turns out he was also nearby, drinking his sorrows away.

Seeing him arrive, Yu Minglang finally relaxed enough to carry Qian off, while still warning Hai Zhao.

”Find a place to sober her up. If you dare lay a finger on her, I’ll make sure you can’t stand up for the rest of your life!”

”Which part?” Qian, obviously a bit tipsy and playful, asked.

Yu Minglang snapped, ”All of them, half off!”

Hai Zhao gave a bitter smile. ”What do you think I am, exactly?”

He wanted to touch her, sure, but anything Mr. Yu didn’t approve of, he wasn’t about to force. Even if Xiaoxi was drunk, he would never take advantage of her.

Yu Minglang knew his childhood friend well, and trusted him, which was why he called him; the threats were just for show.

The second Qian got in the car, she sat up straight and obediently buckled her seat belt. There was zero sign of the drunk mess from a moment ago. Yu Minglang grabbed a wet wipe and scrubbed at her face.

”Easy.”

”You got some nerve, huh. You actually went and challenged all ten of the world’s strongest drinks?”

”So what, it’s not like I’m drunk!” Qian puffed herself up, refusing to admit she’d had too much.

”Just wait. I’ll deal with you when we get back!” Yu Minglang pinched her cheek, then finally let go, seething. This little brat totally had him wrapped around her finger.

”Deal with what, exactly? I haven’t even charged you for the session yet. She’s your sister, so the bill’s on you! I used my ultimate trump card tonight, you know? You think I use ’drinking with my own body on the line’ for just anyone? Only you two siblings get that luxury. If she weren’t your sis, I wouldn’t have gone this far!”

This was top-tier VIP service, she ought to charge extra.

”When did you ever drink with me ’with your body on the line’?”

Qian snorted proudly, not about to tell him.

If it weren’t for that drinking session in the ”previous life”, where would her clever, well-behaved baby girl have come from?

She’d almost given their daughter the nickname ”Little Booze.”

”Drink this, then close your eyes and nap for a bit. I’ll deal with you when we get home. You’re way out of line, downing that much alcohol.” Yu Minglang handed over the hangover tea he’d prepared in advance.