As Aizen in Naruto and Joined a Chat Group

This is an Actor: ? Does Ruiko think I’m four or five years old and can’t take care of myself without Konan-senpai?

Doujin Artist: Hahahaha, exactly! That’s what Ruiko-chan means!

Skirt-Flipping Maniac: No way, I didn’t think that at all!

Scarlet Lotus Fairy: I get it, I get it. The An guy you have in mind is even younger.

Lin Fengjiao: Even younger? How young is that?

Wig Guy: No way, does it mean the kind that hasn’t been weaned yet?

Doujin Artist: Pfft! Damn right, not weaned yet!

Soul Society’s Villain: No wonder Konan went crazy eating papaya and drinking milk when Anzen was in Soul Society. So that’s the reason. You really had it tough.

Lazy Kitten: Hahaha, damn! I’m laughing so hard I can’t breathe! Eat what to make what, right?

Curly-haired Guy: Cut it out, you jerks! There’s no way our great club boss hasn’t been weaned. Even jokes have to make sense! I, Gin-san, can confirm the boss is fully in his menopause years!

This is an Actor: Starting trouble, huh?

Machete Girl: You’re the king of jokes. Damn menopause.

Lazy Kitten: Menopause? This exaggeration is way too much.

Pretty Boy from Skull Island: Clearly this Gin is just causing chaos. Suggest we take him out on the spot!

Foul-Mouthed Mask Guy: No, you can’t do that! You can’t treat this cute little Gin-Gin so cruelly! That would be such a waste, guys! Give him to me. I’ll educate him properly!

Doujin Artist: Sounds good. I approve of this marriage.

Skirt-Flipping Maniac: Seconded.

Machete Girl: No objections here.

Amegakure Village’s Angel: Then it’s happily decided.

Curly-haired Guy: Decided my ass, you jerks! What do you think I, Gin-san, am? Who the hell wants to hang out with this guy whose ass and face look the same? Sleeping next to him at night would be a real nightmare, hey!

Skirt-Flipping Maniac: That’s messed up. Damn... ass and face look the same. (covers face)

Soul Society’s Villain: You’ve already thought about the sleeping part? Looks like you’ve seriously considered this path.

Lin Fengjiao: Impressive. As expected from Gin.

Curly-haired Guy: No no, I just made the connection without thinking! Don’t get the wrong idea, guys. My tastes are totally normal!

Machete Girl: No misunderstanding. You don’t need to explain.

Doujin Artist: Yeah yeah, no need to explain! We really don’t misunderstand. Really!

Curly-haired Guy: Your tone is off. Totally off! Don’t you trust me, Gin-san? You think Gin-san is joking? Nope, Gin-san is telling the truth! I really only like girls. Zero interest in guys!

Skirt-Flipping Maniac: We said no misunderstanding, Gin-san. Don’t be so sensitive. Acting like this will make us think more, you know.

Lin Fengjiao: To be honest, I’ve already started thinking more.

Scarlet Lotus Fairy: Nothing else here? Then I’m heading back. My troops are still attacking Xiangyang city. I need to check on them.

Amegakure Village’s Angel: Okay, Mochou, you go first. Thanks for your hard work this time.

Scarlet Lotus Fairy: I should thank you guys. After all, I got a big reward.

Doujin Artist: By the way, we should thank Kisame-san the most this time, right?

Skirt-Flipping Maniac: Seems like it! Kisame-san was the first to come to this Naruto world. He was the one who found the Reincarnator during the live stream... but we took all the kill points. (covers face)

Machete Girl: Wow, only Kisame-san gets hurt in this world.

Shark-Faced Guy: I’m fine. As long as it’s solved.

Skirt-Flipping Maniac: Kisame-san is such a good guy! He has a face that looks like a big bad guy, but he always does big good deeds.

Machete Girl: Yeah, Kisame-san is a real good person. Way better than some male group members!

Curly-haired Guy: Which male group members? You’re not talking about me, Gin-san, right? Definitely not Gin-san, right?

Lazy Kitten: If Kisame-san didn’t have that face, he’d be super popular with girls, right? What a shame.

Shark-Faced Guy: ...

Doujin Artist: Stop it. I feel like Kisame-san is about to cry from all your good guy cards! No points is bad enough, but so many good guy cards! Damn, thinking about it makes me want to spit blood!

Amegakure Village’s Angel: Okay, okay, that’s enough! Eriri-chan and Ruiko-chan, staying for dinner? If not, everyone scatter.

Skirt-Flipping Maniac: No, Academy City has tons of paperwork to handle.

Doujin Artist: Me too. Feels like I can’t interrupt Konan-sis sword training.

Buzz.

Two golden streams of light covered them. Ruiko and Eriri vanished instantly from the Naruto world. Of the five group members, only Konan and Unohana Retsu stayed in Konoha square.

Amegakure Village’s Angel: Eriri-chan, you looking to get beat?

Konan had black lines all over her head. Her mouth corner twitched a bit. She had wanted to use the chat to distract and make Unohana Retsu forget about sword training for now.

But this Eriri cruelly kicked her into the pit. What a hateful little side wife!

Doujin Artist: Slipping away, slipping away. I wish Konan-sis success in her training!

Machete Girl: Hahahaha! Eriri-chan, you’re such a troll! Don’t you want Konan-sis to have a few easy days?

Scarlet Lotus Fairy: Pitting Konan like this, she’ll hold a grudge. Watch out when you marry over. She might give you a hard time.

Lazy Kitten: Be confident, drop the might! She’ll definitely give you a hard time. It’s a sure thing. Maybe you’ll even have to empty the spit buckets and toilets at home.

Curly-haired Guy: Hmph, way more than that! She might make you deal with Anzen-san’s foot wash water every day. Scared?

Skirt-Flipping Maniac: That... wouldn’t be so bad, right?

Doujin Artist: ?

Scarlet Lotus Fairy: ?

Machete Girl: Ruiko-chan, what’s wrong with you? Calm down! Think about our position and ideals. We can’t go down the feudal old society path!

Skirt-Flipping Maniac: But what if it becomes a hobby? Then it’s not feudal, right?

Machete Girl: A hobby? How can there be such a weird hobby? That’s foot wash water! Snap out of it!

Lin Fengjiao: Don’t know, just ask. Are girls from the Japan area all so wild at playing?

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