The Captain's Dirty Little Secret

Chapter 291: Chapter 291 - You’re Lying Again

”Why do you look so fucking happy?”

Roxie adjusted the strap of her bag and tried to flatten whatever expression had apparently betrayed her before she even reached them. ”I don’t.”

Karen stared at her while Angela looked between them, then leaned closer like getting a better look at Roxie’s face might solve whatever mystery had suddenly appeared.

”You kind of do,” Angela said.

”I slept well.”

Karen’s eyebrows rose. ”You cried behind the gym yesterday, almost kissed your ex while he was crying too, spent the rest of the day looking like somebody kicked you in the chest, and now you slept well?”

Roxie immediately glanced around to make sure nobody nearby had heard that much detail. Students were moving toward the building around them, filling the sidewalk and front steps, while Zac was already far enough ahead that he had disappeared through the doors with Dylan and Mason.

”I was tired.”

”That explains sleeping. It doesn’t explain whatever the hell this is.” Karen gestured vaguely toward Roxie’s face. ”You look disgusting.”

Roxie frowned. ”Excuse me?”

”Happy disgusting.”

Angela studied her again and nodded. ”Actually, yeah.”

”I hate both of you.”

That only made Karen more suspicious.

Roxie started toward the school before either of them could keep interrogating her, and the girls fell into step beside her. For several seconds she thought she had successfully killed the conversation. She should have known better. Karen had spent years noticing things Roxie wished she would ignore, and apparently one night of getting Zac back had made Roxie incapable of controlling her own face.

They entered the hallway, and Roxie saw him almost immediately.

Zac was farther ahead near the lockers with Mason, one shoulder against the metal while Mason talked about something Roxie could not hear. At least Mason appeared to be talking. Zac’s attention had already shifted past him.

Straight to Roxie.

Her stomach flipped.

She looked away before Karen could catch where her eyes had gone, but knowing Zac was standing there watching her became impossible to ignore. She lasted maybe two seconds before checking again.

He was still looking.

A small grin tugged at his mouth.

Roxie had to bite back her own smile as she gave him a warning look. They had been secret before. They should have been better at this. Yet less than an hour after leaving her bungalow, Zac was staring at her across the hallway like he had forgotten every lesson they had learned the first time.

Unfortunately, Karen was standing right beside her.

”Oh my God.”

Roxie’s stomach dropped.

She kept walking. ”What?”

Karen caught her arm. ”What happened?”

”Nothing.”

”Roxie.”

”What?”

Karen stopped and stared directly at her face. ”You’re lying.”

The word landed harder than Roxie expected.

Yesterday she had sat inside her bungalow and admitted how many years she had spent doing exactly that. She had lied about everything she thought might make Karen and Angela see her differently, building one excuse after another until so much of her life had become something she had to carefully manage around them. She had finally told them the truth, cried until her chest hurt and realized that knowing the worst parts of her life had somehow changed nothing about how much they loved her.

And here she was again.

It had barely been a day.

This was different, and Roxie knew that. She wasn’t creating some fake version of herself or pretending her life was something it wasn’t. She and Zac had only gotten back together last night, and both of them wanted some time before Briarwick turned it into everybody else’s business.

Still, Karen had asked a direct question and Roxie had lied without thinking.

That bothered her more than she wanted it to.

Roxie covered part of her face with one hand and sighed. ”Can we please go somewhere people aren’t walking around us?”

Angela’s eyes widened immediately. ”You guys got back together?”

Roxie grabbed her arm and pulled her closer before half the hallway heard her. ”Jesus Christ, Angela.”

”That’s a yes.”

Karen looked like she couldn’t decide whether she wanted to laugh, yell or physically shake Roxie until the entire story came out.

Roxie glanced around again. ”Later.”

Karen pointed at her. ”You have until Chemistry.”

”That is incredibly specific.”

”Chemistry.”

Then Karen walked ahead like she had just issued an official deadline.

Angela stayed beside Roxie, practically vibrating with curiosity.

”When?”

”Last night.”

Angela’s mouth fell open.

Roxie caught her arm before another loud reaction escaped. ”Later.”

”Did he come to your house?”

”Yes.”

”And?”

”And we talked.”

”And?”

Roxie gave her a look.

Angela’s expression changed immediately.

”Oh.”

Roxie narrowed her eyes. ”Stop.”

”I didn’t say anything.”

”You didn’t have to.”

Angela grinned while Roxie looked away before her own face gave away even more.

This secret was already going terribly.

By the time Roxie reached Chemistry, she had learned exactly how difficult it was to act like nothing had changed when she had woken up wearing Zac’s shirt less than two hours earlier.

He was already in his seat when she entered.

Their eyes met automatically.

Roxie tried walking past like Zac was simply another person in the room, but she could feel his eyes following her until she sat down. She pulled out her notebook and forced herself to look toward the front because she was perfectly capable of surviving one class without staring at her boyfriend.

Thirty seconds later she looked.

He was already looking back.

Roxie narrowed her eyes at him.

Zac dropped his gaze toward his notebook with enough fake innocence that she almost wanted to throw something across the room.

Karen slid into the seat near Roxie and had apparently witnessed the whole thing.

”Jesus Christ,” she whispered.

Roxie kept her eyes forward. ”What?”

”You two are fucking terrible at this.”

”We used to be good.”

Karen looked at her. ”No. You thought you were.”

Roxie glanced over, offended, but Karen’s expression made it obvious she was completely serious.

Mr. Callahan started talking before Roxie could defend their previous secret relationship skills, and for several minutes she actually managed to pay attention. She wrote notes, followed the explanation and almost convinced herself that Zac had stopped being a problem.

Then he shifted in his seat.

Roxie looked automatically.

He caught her again.

His eyebrows rose slightly.

Roxie immediately faced forward.

Karen leaned closer.

”You fucked him.”

Roxie nearly inhaled her own spit.

She turned so quickly her chair squeaked against the floor. ”What the fuck?”

Several heads turned.

Mr. Callahan stopped talking.

”Problem, Miss Jones?”

Heat rushed into Roxie’s face. ”No, sir.”

Karen was staring straight ahead like she had never spoken a word in her life.

Mr. Callahan gave Roxie a long look before continuing.

Roxie waited until he turned back toward the board, then leaned toward Karen. ”What is wrong with you?”

Karen barely moved her mouth. ”That wasn’t a denial.”

”I’m going to kill you.”

”Your face is red.”

”My face is red because you’re a fucking psychopath.”

Karen finally looked at her, fighting a smile. ”Sure.”

Roxie refused to give her anything else.

She also refused to think about last night because apparently remembering even part of it was enough to make her face warmer.

Roxie immediately looked back toward Mr. Callahan.

Whatever happened after Zac came to her bungalow was hers.

Karen could know they got back together. Angela could know they spent the night talking. Everybody could eventually know Zac was her boyfriend again.

Everything else could stay inside the bungalow.

The bell finally rang, and Roxie packed quickly because Karen clearly could not be trusted with another minute of opportunity. Angela joined them farther down the hallway, and for a few moments Roxie was still carrying that ridiculous warmth from Chemistry, half embarrassed and half amused by Zac’s inability to stop looking at her.

Then the rest of Briarwick came back.

Two girls were standing near the lockers ahead.

Roxie barely noticed them until one said, ”...her mom.”

Her steps slowed.

Then another word reached her.

”Motel.”

The smile disappeared from Roxie’s face.

The girls noticed her coming and stopped talking immediately.

That somehow felt worse than hearing the rest.

Roxie kept walking.

Karen turned toward them. ”What the fuck did you just say?”

Roxie caught her arm before she could go back. ”Leave it.”

Karen looked at her. ”They’re talking about you.”

”I know.”

”They can say it to your face, then.”

Roxie tightened her grip. ”Karen.”

Angela moved closer on Roxie’s other side while the two girls suddenly became fascinated by something inside one of the lockers.

The urge to disappear came back immediately.

Roxie could find the bathroom. She could go behind the gym. She could stay somewhere quiet until the burning in her face faded and she felt like nobody could look at her and see exactly how badly those two words had affected her.

That had always been easier.

Hide the reaction first.

Deal with everything alone later.

But people were going to talk whether Roxie stood there listening or buried herself somewhere nobody could see her. Yesterday Mike had confirmed how far the story had already spread. Today she was beginning to understand what that actually meant.

Claire’s name could be floating through conversations Roxie never heard. The motel could come up between classes, in bathrooms, at lunch, in the parking lot. Her mother had become another piece of Briarwick gossip while Roxie was simply trying to get through her day.

Her stomach tightened.

She kept walking.

Karen looked back at the girls once more, her expression murderous, then apparently decided Roxie meant it when she said to leave them alone.

”Whatever. Those bitches can go fuck themselves. I have something more important to ask.”

Roxie sighed because she already knew exactly what was coming. ”Karen.”

”No. Somewhere private. Now.”

Angela nodded. ”Probably a good idea.”

They found an empty stairwell between periods, and Karen barely waited for the door to close before turning toward Roxie.

”Tell me.”

Roxie leaned against the wall and looked between both of them. There was absolutely no point dragging this out anymore. Angela had basically figured it out in the hallway, and Karen had spent Chemistry watching Roxie and Zac fail miserably at pretending they were still broken up.

”We’re back together.”

Karen stared.

Angela’s mouth opened.

Roxie closed her eyes briefly. ”There. Now you know.”

”Oh my fucking God,” Karen said.

”Keep your voice down.”

Angela threw her arms around Roxie before she could stop her, nearly pushing Roxie back against the wall.

”You got back together!”

”Yes. Apparently that means you should choke me.”

Angela finally released her but stayed grinning like Roxie had just announced something she had personally been waiting for.

Karen was quieter.

That immediately made Roxie nervous.

Karen being silent usually meant she had several things she wanted to say and was deciding which version would cause the least damage.

Roxie looked at her. ”Say something.”

Karen crossed her arms. ”Seriously? You really want me to? Because I’m trying very hard to stay a good friend right now.”

Roxie sighed. ”I know. I know. It just happened.”

”Wow. You lasted for hours.”

Angela smiled. ”You were literally sobbing into his hoodie yesterday. I knew it was only a matter of time.”

She told them Zac came over after she got home. She told them how he stood outside her door and said he wanted her back, the actual relationship rather than some bullshit version where they pretended to be friends while still wanting each other.

She explained that they finally talked about what Tennessee really meant to both of them and how Zac had treated her uncertainty about where she wanted to go after graduation like proof that she was uncertain about him.

The rest belonged to her and Zac, and judging by Karen’s earlier comment in Chemistry, giving her any additional information would be a terrible idea.

By the time Roxie finished, Angela looked relieved.

Karen still watched her carefully.

”And you believe him?”

Roxie hesitated.

The pause was small, but Karen noticed immediately.

”I believe he means it,” Roxie said. ”And we’re trying.”

”That wasn’t what I asked.”

”I know.”

Roxie rubbed her palms against her skirt and tried to figure out how to explain something she had barely settled inside herself.

”I’m sure I want him. I’m not sure we suddenly know how to be good at this.”

Karen stayed quiet for a moment longer before nodding. ”Okay.”

Roxie blinked. ”Okay?”

”You expected a speech?”

”Kind of.”

”I gave you enough speeches yesterday.”

A laugh escaped Roxie before she could stop it.

Karen pointed at her. ”I still think both of you are fucking insane.”

”That sounds more like you.”

”And I still don’t trust him completely.”

Roxie nodded. ”Fair.”

”But you’re the one dating him.”

”Also fair.”

Karen sighed, and some of the tension finally left her shoulders. ”If this is what you want, then I’m going to try to be happy for you.”

Angela looked at Karen. ”That was surprisingly mature.”

Karen turned toward her. ”Fuck off.”

Roxie laughed.

The relief came harder than she expected. She had known Karen and Angela loved her. Yesterday had proved that in ways Roxie was still trying to understand. Yet there had still been a small part of her preparing for Karen to tell her she was stupid, that going back to Zac meant she had learned nothing, that she was making another mistake.

Maybe she was.

But it was hers to make.

Then Karen’s eyes narrowed again.

”But you were planning to hide this from us.”

Roxie winced. ”Sorry.”

”After yesterday?”

”I know.”

This time Roxie really did.

She and Zac had decided to keep their reconciliation quiet for now because having the entire school watch them again sounded exhausting. Somewhere between leaving the bungalow and reaching Karen, Roxie had automatically turned privacy into lying.

Nobody had told her she needed to lie to Karen and Angela.

She had simply done it.

By the time they started toward the cafeteria, Karen and Angela had moved on to debating whether Roxie and Zac could realistically make it through the rest of the day without getting caught. Roxie was about to defend herself when her phone vibrated inside her bag.

Her stomach reacted before she even pulled it out.

She already knew.

Roxie reached into her bag and opened the message.

Zac: Babe, can you meet me in the west restroom?

Her mouth immediately pulled into a smile.

Karen saw it.

”Oh, Jesus Christ.”

Roxie hugged the phone closer to her chest. ”Shut up.”