The Trash Returned from Warhammer

Achoo!

Shinji let out a soft sneeze, instantly earning a flurry of concerned looks.

”No way, did you actually catch a cold?”

Kensuke Aida looked utterly incredulous, causing other customers in the shop to glance over. They seemed to be thinking: It’s a cold, not a terminal illness; is all that shock really necessary?

”No. I rarely get sick.”

”Then someone must be thinking about you?”

”Invariably.”

Shinji nodded without a second thought. This wasn’t some cliché trope.

A psyker’s intuition is razor-sharp; even without active use of his powers, he would instinctively dodge if a sniper were aiming at him.

’An unfamiliar sensation... who is watching me? Hmm, not much hostility.’

He ”read” the non-existent gaze and, after a moment’s thought, deduced the source was likely on SEELE’s side. He had just received news that the Committee had held a top-secret meeting.

SEELE had over a dozen members, with the Human Instrumentality Committee at its core. A regular member like Saionji could obtain partial information—such as the mobilization of Japanese resources to the U.S. for the S² Engine installation experiment on Unit-03. As for why they were conducting such an experiment, that was beyond his clearance.

’Is it really okay to mount the repaired core of the 3rd Angel onto an EVA?’

Shinji already knew the details of the experiment, yet he supported SEELE’s madness. Similar reckless practices were a common occurrence back in the 41st Millennium.

”Shinji, what are you thinking about?”

Toji suddenly poked him, sounding a bit impatient. ”When are they coming out? It’s been almost half an hour.”

Returning to the present, Shinji and the others were executing a different kind of ”mission.” He didn’t even bother to control the agents disguised as tourists nearby, snapping photos with their cameras.

This mission was accompanying several girls to buy the outfits needed for the New Year’s Fireworks Festival. Even if SEELE watched the ”live broadcast” of the scene, they wouldn’t find anything suspicious.

In what world would a master conspirator attend school normally and spend his free time accompanying girls to buy clothes instead of plotting schemes?

Of course, Shinji had only come along under the desperate pleading of Toji and Kensuke.

”This proves they are taking this event seriously. If they left in two or three minutes, wouldn’t that seem superficial?”

”You make so much sense. As expected of the Great Teacher.”

”Great Teacher?”

”Yeah, everyone at school calls you that. They say Shinji-kun can answer any question, and your words have depth—you know, the ’hitting the nail on the head’ kind.”

Toji got excited and patted his chest. ”We were the first to know you. Our seniority goes way back.”

”Clearly, I was the first one to greet Shinji. Whatever, let’s not be childish,” Kensuke waved him off, adding with a face of devotion, ”Everything is the Emperor’s guidance. Under His protection, I haven’t failed a single subject, and I even got a girlfriend.”

’Believe in the Emperor, pass your exams? Believe in the Emperor, escape the single life?’

Shinji didn’t know if this was loyalty or sacrilege, so he found it hard to respond. Fortunately, a shy voice interrupted.

”Sorry to keep you waiting! Toji, what do you think of this one?”

Hikari Horaki was the first to step out. She did a little spin in front of Toji. She had chosen a plain-colored yukata, which, paired with her gentle expression, had a sort of rustic beauty.

”Uh, it’s alright.”

Toji rubbed his nose awkwardly. Just as he was trying to think of a compliment, Chihaya Rin emerged. Her yukata was much flashier, and with her long pink hair, she looked full of energy. Unfortunately, before he could look for more than two seconds, his ear was pinched.

”Hey, hey! What are you looking at?”

”I’m not looking at anything!”

’Childish.’

Shinji glanced at the two couples, not quite understanding such complex emotions. Just then, the curtain was pulled back again, and a girl like frozen snow stepped out.

Rei Ayanami’s yukata was a light violet—neither plain nor gaudy—covered in patterns of moon rabbits. Her ice-blue hair was pinned up with a golden hairpin in the center.

Cold, noble, yet gentle as water. The moment she appeared, Hikari and Chihaya were eclipsed. When Shinji cast an appreciative look and said, ”Not bad, it suits your temperament,” the ice melted into a smile, elevating her beauty to another level.

Unfortunately, her exclusive beauty didn’t last long, as another girl with a completely different but equally striking aura stepped out.

In a fiery red yukata with a sun-disc pattern, her long orange-red hair was let down, adding a touch of maturity while retaining her vitality. Asuka’s face was slightly flushed, but she wasn’t shy at all. She strode forward, radiating absolute confidence.

”Hmph. So this is a Japanese yukata. Not much different from the one I wore at the hot springs.”

She stood next to Rei, sweeping away the gloom of the past few days and puffing out her chest. ”Shinji, does it suit me? Though I still think Western dresses look better.”

Standing with Rei—red and blue, passion and coldness—they were equally matched in their own ways.

”It’s decent. A perfect contrast to Rei’s temperament.”

”Then who looks better?”

Asuka twirled around, feeling the hem of the skirt flutter, her eyes full of anticipation.

”I have said it many times: equal beauty cannot be ranked. Like positive and negative poles, just be yourself.”

’Hmph, that old line again.’

Asuka curled her lip, seemingly annoyed by his diplomatic answer. She glanced at Rei next to her and immediately straightened her posture, her meaning clear: ’Equal beauty, perhaps, but I am bigger and taller.’

Rei turned her head slightly, ignoring her. She was honestly at a loss for words regarding this ”glass cannon.”

If she attacked proactively, Asuka was so fragile she’d lean toward becoming a shut-in after a few words, forcing Ikari-kun to clean up the mess. But once Germanic ”Win-ology” was back online, she became incredibly troublesome, trying to compete over everything.

”Alright, alright, let’s change out of these before we get them dirty,” Hikari jumped in to play peacemaker as the atmosphere shifted.

”Are you guys in a hurry to get home? If not, a new cake shop opened nearby. Shall we go sit for a bit?”

”Sure! Let’s play cards! I’ve been practicing for a long time,” Asuka said, rubbing her hands together, her eyes locked onto Shinji.

’It’s all your fault, making this Lady doubt herself because of one sentence. This time, I’m getting my revenge.’

Shinji sensed this trace of ”murderous intent” but didn’t pay it any mind. Asuka was the type who never learned her lesson; she had completely forgotten how Rei had beaten her so badly at video games she practically developed an allergy to consoles.

’Boring.’

Shinji never participated in these after-school activities, but since he had nothing to do today, he hesitated for a moment.

”Hey, you’re not going to be a deserter, are you?”

Asuka suddenly chirped. She immediately ducked behind Rei, realized she’d hidden behind the wrong person, and scurried behind Hikari.

This was a ”finishing move” against Shinji; it couldn’t be used lightly.

”What did you say?”

Shinji indeed glared at her. ”Deserter” was a forbidden word in his vocabulary. Seeing Asuka making a face and trying to act cute to get away with it, he flashed a bloodthirsty smile.

”Fine. Since you seek a beating, I shall grant it to you.”

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Soon, the group changed back into their school uniforms and moved to the cake shop. They got a small private room, ordered some drinks and cake, and sat around a small table.

Shinji glanced at the newly renovated room and wondered why people kept opening shops in a place as dangerous as Tokyo-3. He only relaxed when he saw a specific hidden mark in the corner.

’Security Department assets. No wonder that waiter looked familiar.’

In this world, there was no such thing as ”pure, everyday youth”; it was simply that someone else was keeping the danger at bay.

He didn’t alert anyone, only looking at Asuka who was noisily shuffling cards opposite him. ”How much longer are you going to shuffle?”

”Uh, it makes it look professional! Like a God of Gamblers!” Asuka blinked.

”So we are playing a high-stakes game? Like in the movies?”

”Uh, I only know how to play ’Old Maid’.”

”Old Maid? Wht’s that?”

Shinji looked confused. He knew how to hack birdmen to pieces, but he didn’t know ”Old Maid.” Kensuke, stifling a laugh, quickly explained it to him.

The rules were simple: add a joker, deal the rest equally, and everyone takes turns drawing a card from the person next to them. If you make a pair, you discard it. The last person left with the single card is the loser.

”This simple? Are you sure this isn’t a game for primary schoolers? There’s no technical skill involved.”

”Hmph hmph hmph! Don’t underestimate this game. This is a pure clash of luck. You can’t even cheat.”

Seeing Shinji’s ”rookie” expression, Asuka’s confidence soared. ”I even made an upgrade! Everyone writes a penalty on a slip of paper and puts it in a box. The Joker has to draw one and do it. No backing out!”

”Mixed with ’King’s Game’? That sounds kind of fun,” Chihaya Rin, the only one without a partner, said with sparkling eyes while rubbing her palms. ”Then I’m going to have some fun with all you couples and your ’stink of love’!”

”Stop it! What kind of prank are you planning?”

”Haha! What if I write ’must KISS in public’?”

”No! That’s too much!”

The sounds of playful laughter echoed in the room. Shinji looked at Rei, whose competitive spirit had suddenly exploded, and Asuka, who was already looking full of regret. He felt a sense of unfamiliarity with the scene.

’Wait. Why did I come? Just because of Asuka’s clumsy provocation?’

This was his first time participating in such an after-school activity. Thinking back, it wasn’t technically the first time; he had spent a lot of effort on the school festival, which also had nothing to do with combat.

’Whatever. This is also part of ’self-complementation.’’

Shinji closed his eyes briefly, not bothering to think about what would happen if he got pranked. On any battlefield, the Emperor’s Champion never fails.

’Luck?’

When he opened his eyes, the intensity of his fighting spirit was so fierce that Asuka almost ran away on the spot. Only then did she realize her own competitiveness was nothing compared to this man; he truly demanded to be the Champion in every single thing he did.

’Are you sure you want to compete in luck against a Veteran of Ten Thousand Battles?!’

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