I Am Your Natural Enemy

This is a classic case of thinking not keeping up with the times.

Back in the day, if someone jumped off the bridge over the river, they’d hit the water first, probably get injured, then drown.

Unless there were rescue workers nearby on the water, otherwise, when the river’s running fast, and the person gets hurt and passes out after falling in, one sweep from the undertow and they just disappear.

Two or three minutes, tops, and the person’s gone. If you’re not rescuing them right away, you don’t even have a chance.

If it were before, that guy really would have gotten away with dying for good.

Now? Fat chance. Those Water Demons in this section of river, just hanging around gathering merit, you think they’re decorations?

How’s that saying go? Blocking the path is a grudge that can’t be shared under the same sky.

The Water Snake holding back from strangling that guy on the spot—talk about restraint.

”Is that all?”

”That’s all I can say. The rest is still under investigation and interrogation, I don’t really know, so I don’t want to say anything wrong.”

”Alright, if it’s got nothing to do with me, I’m not that interested. Cai Heizi offends people like this all the time—doesn’t he worry someone’s gonna take a shot at him?”

”Heh, I’ll tell you the truth: our Minister doesn’t even have a bodyguard. He’s just waiting for someone to try and shoot him.”

”Psshh...” Wen Yan gave it a thought and sucked in a cold breath.

Cai Heizi is just too... Cai Heizi.

”I never said anything. You know nothing.”

”Yup, didn’t hear a thing.”

”If you’re free, there’s something I might need you to help with.”

”What is it?”

”That Water Ghost who turned himself in at the Scorching Sun Department earlier—we might need you to meet him.”

”No time.”

”Relax, it’s not about meeting the Water Monarch. Even if you wanted to, we couldn’t have you go.”

”So, what do you need me to do?”

”Just to confirm something.”

”Fine, I’ll swing by when I have time.” Wen Yan was about to hang up when something occurred to him: ”Oh right, there’s one more thing—could you make an introduction for me?”

”What is it?”

”I’m planning on installing a few street lamps under Old Zhao’s place.”

”Seriously...?”

”Very serious.”

”Normal people can’t go down there and install those.”

”I’ll do it myself.”

”...”

After hanging up, Wen Yan didn’t bother with it anymore. Probably would have to ask Feng Wei to clear a path later; otherwise there was just no way to even get a lamp pole down into Old Zhao’s place.

It’s not really for Pei Tugou’s convenience pulling people up—Wen Yan just felt having street lamps in the Nether Path would actually be pretty neat.

Other places don’t have these fully fixed entrances, so it’s not easy to run wires down. Only here really works.

Soon it was nighttime, and the community started getting lively.

While Wen Yan was still tidying up at home, he looked out the window and saw the delivery guy pushing a food cart outside.

Didn’t even have to ask—had to be for his place.

Took the cart in, got back inside, and within five minutes, saw Sparrow Cat wobbling back like a big, flailing moth.

Sparrow Cat was about to crash headfirst into the door, so Wen Yan just sighed, opened it, and caught her.

”Who’s ever heard of a bird that weighs over twenty pounds?”

”It’s totally normal for a cat to be over twenty pounds!”

”If a cat’s over twenty pounds, it oughta go on a diet!”

”I’m not even a cat, why should I diet!”

”...” Wen Yan glared. Ever since this damn Sparrow Cat’s food bill shot up to a hundred and twenty a day, she’d gotten way too cocky.

”You sure you’ve got enough money to pay for this meal?”

”I don’t need to buy a house, clothes, or makeup—can’t even spend all my food money. Today, dinner’s on me.” Sparrow Cat held her head high, smug as could be.

”Where’s everyone else?”

”On the way. I ran ahead to pick up the food so it didn’t get delivered to the wrong door.”

”In this row, who else even orders takeout except us?”

”Gauss, obviously! He orders takeout more than I do. Eats eight meals a day, never puts on weight.”

”What kind of neighbors are you people...”

Wen Yan figured he’d only been away for a little over a month, so how did things get like this?

Not long after, the Steward came back with everyone, carrying loads of bags.

Just reaching the door, Little Zombie blinked and popped up on Wen Yan’s back, whining and wailing.

”Dinner’s coming up. Don’t eat any snacks or you won’t have room.”

Little Zombie blinked, quieted down, hugged Wen Yan’s neck, and rested her chin on his shoulder.

Next, a lump of Little Fire Seed came rolling over the stone slabs right up to Wen Yan’s feet, stretched out two little hands and waved at him.

Wen Yan picked it up, set it on his other shoulder; Little Fire Seed tucked itself into his collar, peeking out with its little hands grabbing on.

Then the Steward, dragging a suitcase with his back straight, got within three steps and gave a slight bow.

”Welcome home, sir.”

Behind the Steward, Chen Qimo, with her schoolbag and uniform, eyes all red, walked up without a word, hugged Wen Yan around the waist, buried her face in his chest, and wiped her eyes on his shirt.

She wasn’t sure if anyone else knew, but she knew that when everyone in the whole complex was evacuated in a rush, it meant something was really dangerous.

She’d overheard someone from the Scorching Sun Department once say, if need be, they wouldn’t hesitate to tear the whole place down.

She didn’t really get what the danger was, but she could kind of sense how serious it was.

She was really scared that just as she’d gotten used to her new home, it’d be gone again.

Even if, counting heads, Wen Yan was the only living human at home, she still thought it was great.