Lackey's Seducing Survival Odyssey

Chapter 1398: I love him, right?

Delphine Frostblade’s POV

Inside Principal’s office...

I blankly looked at the pamphlet... that had an announcement of an official engagement. The words felt heavier than the thin sheet of paper, as if someone had quietly carved a verdict meant only for me.

”Damn... he really pulled this shit off, didn’t he?” Principal muttered with a surprised and slightly amused tone as she looked at the pamphlet that she personally received from Maelona.

Since the Principal was kind of higher authoritative here too, she received this official pamphlet.

Principal glanced at me before leaning on her chair as she stared at me... as if she was asking for something. A silent push. A silent question she expected me to answer. Her eyes pressed against the pieces of my expression that I was trying to hide.

I... I just sighed, ”I don’t have anything to comment on this matter,” as I put the pamphlet on the table before us. My voice came out low, thinner than I expected, as if it struggled to hold itself steady.

Principal’s lips curled up as she shook her head, ”Still holding on to it? Come on, girl, just how long will you keep hanging on it?” Her tone wasn’t mocking; it carried tired concern, the kind built from watching someone crumble slowly over time.

I sighed inwardly. Here we go again... she was going to lecture me, wasn’t she? A familiar ache formed in my chest, the kind that came whenever someone pressed a wound I had refused to treat.

Just as I was about to shake my head completely, she said those words that hit my heart.

”See, I am not supporting him... I just want you to decide rather than filling your thoughts with work and trying to avoid facing the reality.

How long do you think you’ll keep going on like that? Huh?” she said as she tapped on the pamphlet with a serious tone.

”This is reality... no one waits for anyone! The moment you hesitate, others take the opportunity. No one is going to wait for you... And this is the answer for your long wait.”

I bit my lips as I stared at the pamphlet, my eyes slowly dropping down, unable to say anything.

I had time... a really long time to think... to process what to choose, what to do with my life, but I didn’t focus on that... because the moment I focused on it, his face came to my mind, filling my senses completely.

The softness in his smile, the ease in his teasing tone, the warmth in the way he said my name... every part of him dragged me down a path I tried to bury.

His voice, his teasing... his love and... his lies... everything crashing into me like a scar that refuses to leave.

A scar that throbbed every time his name was mentioned.

A scar that still shaped the way I breathed.

So I focused on work, rebuilding the academy, fully focusing on my shift into this... not caring for anything other than work, and managed to rebuild it faster than what the Principal initially planned.

It was easier to drown myself in stone, schedules, and responsibilities than let myself think of him, right?

I did something great, right?

Something everyone praised.

Something that should have filled the emptiness. But somehow... it didn’t.

But this is what I get in return? The world was moving on... Him moving on!

And me still standing here, holding memories that no longer mattered.

”Can I take a day off, Principal?” I asked, bowing my head. My voice trembled slightly, betraying the exhaustion I tried to bury under professionalism.

Principal stared at me before shaking her head, ”You lost child... I don’t know if I should pity you. Go, take a day, and please stop avoiding facing it. The more you avoid... believe me, it is going to cost you not only the relationships but everything... There are things that you can only face head-on!” Her words softened at the end, weary and honest, as if she had seen too many people fall because they ran from what hurt.

I nodded.

I just walked out of the office and kept walking... blankly staring at the path. My steps felt automatic, guided by habit rather than intent.

Face head-on?

The words echoed in my mind, loud and accusing, as if fate itself was standing in front of me waiting for my answer.

Did she think I wasn’t trying to face it?

The fuck she knew!

She saw the surface—never the nights I spent staring at the ceiling, forcing myself to breathe through the chaos.

I clenched my fist tightly!

I knew what I was doing... I... I’m trying to face it... I fucking trying to face him directly and talk to him.

I rehearsed words a hundred times, built courage piece by piece, only for it to crumble the moment I imagined his eyes meeting mine.

I knew... all it needed was a talk!

Just a single honest conversation.

A SINGLE FUCKING TALK!!

Yet, I... I couldn’t bring myself to talk? Every time I tried, my throat tightened, my heart panicked, my mind shut down like it was protecting me from something I didn’t know how to face.

Why? Why did something so simple feel like lifting a mountain?

When I saw his face in the Ruler selection of the Zephyra Empire... I... I saw him.

The moment I saw him... I felt the love and pain... I don’t understand... I should hate him for cheating me or... just love him, accepting everything.

Both emotions suffocated me, fighting inside my chest, neither willing to surrender.

Yet, I couldn’t accept either of them.

I couldn’t hate him fully.

I couldn’t love him completely.

I stayed suspended between both, lost in the middle.

Why?

Why did my heart refuse to choose?

When I saw other women loving him... they knew each other... they knew he loves others too... yet their love was there, and they kept loving him.

They stood together without flinching, without breaking, without questioning if they were enough.

Unlike me... who is struggling to understand it!

Am I... not loving him as much as they do? That fear burned deep... like love wasn’t measured by feeling but by how far someone was willing to go.

That’s why he hid the truth until the last?

Because he thought I would walk away?

Because he didn’t trust my heart?

He didn’t believe me at all?

Trust mattered more than anything, yet mine wasn’t enough for him to hold on to.

My love... was just pale compared to others?

A weak shade of what the others offered him?

Was that it?

Was that the unspoken truth?

Was that the reason?

The reason he couldn’t tell me... couldn’t trust me... couldn’t believe I would stay?

Am I not enough?

So many questions kept coming to my mind whenever I tried to approach him. They swarmed me, pushed me back, stole the strength I built up each time.

I... I utterly lost myself into this!

My heart spun in circles, tangled in hope, anger, confusion—everything blending into something I couldn’t pull apart.

They loved him even after knowing the truth, yet... here I am struggling!

They endured it... They understood... They accepted!

But I drowned in the uncertainty he left behind.

Why?

Why did my feelings refuse to fall neatly into place like theirs?

What’s wrong with them... or what’s wrong with me?

Was I too fragile?

Too stubborn?

Too hopeful?... Or just too afraid to break all over again?

”I don’t know...” I muttered as I stepped out of the Academy’s gate, slowly walking back to my house... to rest!

All in while I could think of him and him alone... Every step, every breath, every stray thought circled back to him, refusing to let me escape.

How he managed to save the Empires. The weight he carried. The choices he made. The burden that shaped him into someone unreachable... yet someone I could never stop looking at.

How he managed to create a barriers around the Empires.

How he managed to do all of this.

These were the times I felt proud of him... too much!

The kind of pride that warmed my chest, even when the rest of my heart felt bruised and confused beyond recognition.

Yes, He acts, He lies, He manipulates... but he does the job and does what’s necessary to achieve his goal.

He was not perfect!

Neither me nor anyone.

We were both flawed pieces, trying to fit into a world that demanded too much from us.

Even the broadcast, Aether and Victor... I couldn’t help but smile softly.

Their reactions, their shock, their awe—everything about that moment showed just how far he had gone to hold everything together.

To put the empires together and stop the madness... He lied, he acted, and he manipulated... which results in... for better future.

He carried that weight alone, shouldering the ugliness of it just so others could walk a cleaner path.

Sure, if the truth comes out one day, they might not believe him anymore, but for now... that’s what he needed to do.

For now, that was the only choice left.

For now, he chose the world over his own peace.

To make them understand and to make them stop!

From this... I could get it. That was his only option, but... for me, that’s different... all he needed to do was just talk.

A conversation he kept running from. A truth he chose to hide. A silence he allowed to grow between us until it choked me.

A simple factual Talk!

One honest moment... Just that.

Did I ask too much?

Sometimes the question felt childish... yet it hurt because part of me feared the answer was yes.

From this... I could get it. I started to understand there was this another part of him... A part that I didn’t see before... How perfect his acting was... How excellent his manipulation was...How well he played every role required of him, except the one where he was supposed to stand beside me.

He was just not only the boy I loved nothing but also direct, straightforward, lovely and... Pervert.

No... that was only a fraction of who he was.

Behind that playful grin... There was a mind that calculated everything, a heart that hid more than it revealed.

This side of his... very dangerous one!

One wrong move... who knows if he was acting or real... Who knows if the warmth was true or another piece of his performance?

”He’s going to get married soon... ah,” I muttered with a broken tone... I don’t know what he was planning, but... when I heard it... It sure hurt me more than I thought it would.

My eyes trembled, and shaking a bit, I clenched my eyes, controlling my emotions, I entered the house... the house looked dull for some reason.

Lights dimmer, air colder, walls quieter—like everything mirrored the hollow inside my chest.

I... I hate it... I really hate it... him and... Myself!

Hate the way my heart refused to stop.

Hate the way I still cared despite everything.

Hate the way I couldn’t let go.

I blankly stared at the entrance before walking in... going to my bedroom and lying on the bed.

I wanted to sleep... I wanted to move forward... I wanted to leave this tension... as I closed my eyes... I slowly drifted into the dream.

A desperate escape for a moment of peace.

A dream... A dream?

Soft light... warm air... an impossible calm settling inside me.

A flourished green land, as the gentle breeze flowed around, where I was sitting on the chair watching.... My child and my husband were playing around happily.

”Haha... Dad, Spin faster!”

The voice of a child—our child—ringing through the air.

”Okay, My Princess~” His voice carried that playful tone only he used, full of affection, pride, and a gentle warmth that wrapped itself around my heart like a soft blanket.

I watched with a warm smile... seeing them enjoying... what more could I possibly ask for?

Their laughter blended with the wind, light and pure. My child’s tiny hands reached out as he spun, his joy echoing across the green field. My husband’s steady arms guided him, both of them glowing in a happiness I wished time would never touch.

This life... I wished I could have it for eternity.

A peaceful world, untouched by lies or guilt.

A home... A future... A version of me who didn’t have to break or question if she deserved this warmth.

I smiled gently, shouting at them, ”Be careful, don’t spin too much, otherwise you’re going to fly to the sky... ahaha, and I need to find you two—” My voice rang with a joy so natural it startled me.

It felt real—like something I had lived for years instead of only dreaming for seconds.

Ssshhh~

Just then, the space around me cracked with black, dark mist. I flinched and before I knew it... the entire space cracked and fractured into... darkness.

The sound was sharp—like glass shattering behind my ears.

The grass vanished beneath me.

The warmth faded from my skin.

The world peeled back, torn open by an unseen force that swallowed every colour, every breath.

I heart skipped a beat... ”N-No, no, not this again!!” I screamed as if I knew what was going to happen.

Step..!

A stepping sound echoed from the surrounding black mist as they slowly parted, revealing two figures.