Return of the Antagonistic Lady Boss

Chapter 914: Chapter 888: Never Make Excuses (Second Update)

Mothers who particularly love newborns fall into two categories: one is when the family comes together to help take care of the child, sharing the mother’s fatigue and allowing her to experience the joy of parenting more quickly; the other is an unconscious display for others and herself — an act — but this act is actually not a bad thing for the mother herself.

Most women use this ”act” of love to hypnotize themselves. When people around them think it’s only natural for mothers to love their children, they also hypnotize themselves in this way, gradually accepting their identity as mothers and quickly falling in love with their babies.

It also doesn’t rule out cases like Zhuzi’s wife, where life is too difficult and tiring, and even hypnosis doesn’t work.

Ask yourself this: Who would instantly love a baby that’s so exhausting and tormenting if not for some self-masochism?

As if in response to Qian’s words, a neighbor’s house suddenly emitted the piercing cries of a baby, still clearly audible in this well-soundproofed community, reaching the ears of Qian and Zhuzi’s wife.

”Look, it’s not easy to quickly adapt to the presence of a crying, fussing baby like this one. It takes time, right? You must have been quite stressed at the beginning,” Qian’s seemingly casual words struck a chord.

”Indeed, it was exhausting. Before having the child, I weighed 120 pounds. In the year of taking care of the baby, I lost 20 pounds. Later, as she grew a bit older, I gained it back. There was a time when all I wanted to do was get a good night’s sleep.”

”I understand how you feel.” Qian also thought of the days in her past life caring for Xiaowei.

Back then, she had no family, lived in poverty, and almost succumbed to postpartum depression while caring for the little baby. Eventually, as the child grew and sweetly called her ’mom,’ becoming more endearing, Qian’s love for her daughter deepened to the point of sacrificing the world for her.

The outside world only uses stereotypes to constrain women, like the thoughts of Zhuzi, believing that women are naturally supposed to like children, and not liking them signals a problem. This counterproductive mindset can easily lead to depression.

That’s why many new mothers experience postpartum depression.

The correct way to address this is to share the mother’s burden. When the family plays a role in sharing the load, mothers feel the joy of parenting love and being loved. When they hear their baby call them ’mom’ for the first time, watch her toddle, see her grow bit by bit, that sense of fulfillment surpasses everything, and maternal love evolves gradually, although everyone’s personal situation is different.

The situation like Zhuzi’s wife isn’t strange at all; it’s very common.

The rarest thing is understanding. When Zhuzi’s wife heard that she was understood, she felt an indescribable feeling of warmth in her heart. At a time when she thought she wasn’t a good woman, someone understood her, objectively analyzed the problem, making it incredibly healing and heartwarming.

”So, Meiwei, what should I do?”

”Your family has quite a few issues; I’ll help you sort them out step by step. First, we need to resolve the negative impact of your childhood lack of fatherly love on your current emotions. After that, you’ll have less of a barrier with your baby. Even more importantly, your husband needs to participate in parenting. This will benefit both you and the child.”

”He... it’s useless; he doesn’t want to look after the child. He says he’s a man, and this is all women’s work.”

”Don’t worry, I have a way to handle this. In the meantime, you should seriously reconsider the plan for a second child. It’s up to you to decide whether to have another, but I can responsibly tell you that given your current situation, having a second child will only exhaust you and worsen your elder daughter’s issues.”

Again, having children won’t hold a man’s heart.

”But if I don’t have another child, he’ll insist on getting a divorce. If we really get divorced, what will happen to my elder daughter?”

”If you have a second daughter and he still wants a divorce, what will happen to your elder daughter and your second daughter? The problems are still unsolved. Having any number of children won’t resolve the issues; it will just add more distress. The first thing to address now is your emotional depression. I’ll help adjust it, allowing you to fall in love with your child more quickly. For the sake of your children, you’ll find you possess unlimited capability to eliminate anything you perceive as blocking you, including your husband.”

A woman may be gentle by nature, but becomes strong as a mother, provided she accepts the role transition.

After some simple emotional guidance, Qian began formal therapy. Under much pressure, Zhuzi’s wife already showed signs of depression. Added to this was the lack of emotional support from her childhood, causing her emotions to be unstable, back and forth.

Using ’Acceptance and Commitment Therapy,’ Qian employed a series of professional techniques to help Zhuzi’s wife eliminate her current psychological rigidity and view the childhood lack of paternal love more flexibly.

This process took more than an hour.

After the therapy ended, Zhuzi’s wife felt significantly better; she even found herself wanting to call her daughter.

When Xiaoqiang came back, Zhuzi and his wife had already left, and Qian was alone, leaning against the window frame looking at the moon.

”Done?” He put his arms around her waist from behind.

”Yeah, where did you take Uncle Liao?”

”We went to Dad’s place to play chess.”

”Who won?”

”Uncle Liao won more — it’s actually not easy to lose to Dad, hahaha!”

Thinking about his father’s blue steel scowl of regret, Xiaoqiang couldn’t help but laugh.

”Let me tell you, after losing a few games, Dad glared at me while playing, as if saying ’why did you bring him over,’ hahaha, I pretended not to see!”

Mr. Yu’s wish to become a chess master seems to have hit a slight snag for now.

”I guess at that moment, Dad must have thought: ’How could I have raised such a useless rascal?’” Qian perfectly imitated Mr. Yu’s voice, and Xiaoqiang laughed heartily.

”Regrets won’t help; who told him to love chess despite being terrible at it?”

The baby in the neighbor’s house started crying again, bawling at the top of his lungs.

Listening to the cries, Qian couldn’t help but reflect on today’s therapy theme.

”You and Xiaoxi are twins, so what did your parents do when you cried as babies?”

It’s exhausting to care for even one child, let alone two.

”Apparently, I was particularly good at crying as a child, waking up and wailing in the middle of the night, with such force it seemed like the roof would come off. Thinking back, I guess it was due to a lack of calcium, given the living conditions at that time. Xiaoxi was the opposite; whenever I cried, she wanted milk, making Mom feed her while Dad took me to another room. Whenever Dad wasn’t home, my elder brother or second brother would carry me.”

So the elder and second sons of the Yu family matured especially early.

Xiaoqiang learned this from his mother, who said he particularly liked his dad as a child. Every time he cried, he demanded that his father carry him. While teething, he bit Mr. Yu’s shoulder until it was black and blue.

Despite that, Mr. Yu never lost his temper, always letting him gnaw joyfully.