I Became a Witch in a World Full of Urban Legends

Why would they mistake me for the Holy Son of the Miracle Order?

Lu Yibei stared at Shem and Salih ahead, carefully recalling her recent experiences, but came up with nothing.

How would a perennial jinx like me have anything to do with the word “miracle”?

Could always hitting hard pity on gacha, surviving a serious car accident, and having every haunting incident I run into turn into a huge mess count as miracles too?

If that’s the case, the Miracle Order might as well rename itself the Calamity Order!

Unable to figure out the reason for the moment, Lu Yibei weighed the difference in strength between herself and the two people before her. After confirming that even if she messed around, her life would not be in danger, she came up with a bold plan.

She pulled her thoughts back, organized her words, and asked Shem and Salih expressionlessly, “I didn’t expect you to actually find this place. That does surprise this venerable one a little, but…”

“How did you find me? For this operation, I clearly hid myself very well!”

If you had doubts about something, what method could be more convenient and faster than asking the people involved directly?

Lu Yibei had already learned through the haunting chat group that the Miracle Order had been searching for something, passing through multiple countries, causing psychic energy attacks along the way, and finally entering Country Z.Not long after they entered the country, their Holy Son went missing.

But…

That was only what they thought had happened.

Who said this Holy Son was missing? How could a whole person just get lost? I clearly wanted to act alone and secretly create miracles!

“It was a miracle. Miracles guided us to your side!” Salih blurted out, his face flushed with excitement as he spoke.

Lu Yibei: “…”

Seeing this, Shem quickly elbowed Salih and scolded him in a low voice, “Salih! Do not be rude before the Holy Son!”

After speaking, he paused for a moment, turned to Lu Yibei, clasped his fists, and said, “Reporting to the Holy Son, the Flower of Miracles blooms eternally upon you. Its intoxicating fragrance is like the North Star, always guiding us and leading us to your side!”

Lu Yibei: “…”

Damn it! Do none of you Miracle Order people know how to talk like normal human beings?

What the hell, the Flower of Miracles blooms on my body? That sounds like some kind of skin disease!

Although she was roasting Shem’s baffling words in her heart, Lu Yibei still put on an expression as if she had understood and nodded. “Mm, I know. However…”

Halfway through her sentence, her style suddenly changed. Her expression darkened; she suddenly raised her hand and pointed at Shem and Salih, her voice rising a few notches as she barked coldly, “Do you two know your crime?!”

As she spoke, royal authority quietly activated. A faint golden glow flashed across Lu Yibei’s fair skin and wrapped around her body.

For a moment, her petite one-meter-fifty-eight body seemed to exude an aura that had shot up to three meters seventy!

Seeing fear appear on Shem and Salih’s faces, she hurriedly took a step forward and pressed them aggressively. “Let me ask you: do you still remember what we came to Country Z to find?”

If I can fool them, I will! If not, I’ll knock the two of them out and send them to the Great Pure Palace to “turn themselves in”!

“Th-the First Saint’s Holy Relics…” Salih replied weakly.

Shem glanced at Salih and said nothing, seemingly acquiescing to his answer.

Lu Yibei: “…” The First Saint’s Holy Relics? What are those?

“Heh!” Lu Yibei lifted her chin slightly, looked askance at the two, and sneered. “Looks like you still remember! Then let me ask you again: have you found them?”

Not bad, not bad. My acting is getting better!

“Reporting to the Holy Son!” Shem clasped his fists. “We have already found three Holy Relics: the right eye, the heart, and a toe. The finger and the brain are still…”

“You haven’t even found them all yet, so what are you coming to me for?” Before Shem could finish, Lu Yibei cut him off sharply. “Or are you saying you think I cannot create miracles while acting alone?”

A finger? I think I understand why they came looking for me! The rod that fell out after the Myo-o Statue broke is probably the finger they’re searching for.

But if they want me to hand it over, no way! Have you ever seen someone give away the hen that lays golden eggs?

They say that thing belongs to the Miracle Order, but who can prove it? If they call out to it, will that thing answer? Lu Yibei thought furtively.

After hearing Lu Yibei’s words, Shem and Salih immediately looked terrified. Salih’s body even began to tremble.

For members of the Order to question the Holy Son’s ability to create miracles was a grave sin!

Shem lowered his head and hurriedly explained, “Please calm your anger, Holy Son, please calm your anger. Your very walking upon the earth is a miracle. We would not dare harbor the slightest doubt. It is only…”

“Only?” Lu Yibei narrowed her eyes.

“Only that you left without leaving the slightest message and departed quietly. The Order’s members are all worried about your safety…”

“Hmph, ignorance!” Lu Yibei snorted coldly. “This venerable one merely wanted to create a miracle in secret, then astonish everyone!”

Hearing this, Shem and Salih suddenly understood. They exchanged a look and nodded.

This style of action was like the bud of the Flower of Miracles, quietly growing in the night, then blooming grandly the instant the morning sunlight fell.

Just imagining it was enough to make one intoxicated by the fragrance of that magnificent miracle!

As expected of the Holy Son!

Immediately after, Shem looked at Lu Yibei again and asked tentatively, “Holy Son, then shall the two of us… leave now?”

“No need!” Lu Yibei waved her hand. “There is an old saying in Country Z: since you’re already here…”

“Since you have already found me, stay and help me handle a small matter. However, do not reveal my whereabouts to the other members of the Order. The time has not yet come.”

Bluffing these two is just barely manageable…

If all the Miracle Order members currently in Country Z swarmed into Shizhou City, never mind whether the Great Pure Palace would catch them all in one net; with the Miracle Order’s style, if there were too many people, I might not be able to bluff my way through!

And if a few more strong ones came and forced me to create “miracles,” wouldn’t that be like roasting me over a fire? Lu Yibei thought.

“Understood!” Shem and Salih replied in unison, their voices full of excitement.

To remain by the Holy Son of Miracles and participate in the process of the Holy Son creating miracles, even if only by handling trivial matters, was an enormous honor for every member of the Miracle Order.

Lu Yibei secretly observed the two of them. Seeing that they had agreed so readily, she nodded in satisfaction.

Since they are convinced I am the Holy Son of Miracles, I might as well go with the flow and reluctantly borrow their strength.

The investigation into Hu Chuan’s whereabouts has hit a deadlock. Perhaps they can help. As for afterward…

Whether I part ways with them, serve them up to The Midnight Watchers Society with a nice little report attached, or lead the Miracle Order to turn themselves in, I’ll decide after seeing how things go!

While Lu Yibei was thinking, Salih could not wait to ask, “Holy Son, what do we need to do next? Blow up Shizhou City Airport, or set fire to Sleepless Street?”

No, seriously, do you people have to cause trouble to be happy? Lu Yibei looked at Salih, at a loss for words.

“Presumptuous!” Shem growled, glaring at Salih. “How could what the Holy Son wishes to do be something you can influence?”

Mm-hmm! Exactly! Have love, don’t destroy things! Lu Yibei nodded.

“However…” Shem looked at Lu Yibei and changed tack. “Holy Son, do you think a night raid on the Great Pure Palace has any potential? We have intelligence that the Brain Holy Relic may be hidden inside the Great Pure Palace.”

Lu Yibei: “???”

This is exactly why I hate these reckless brutes from the Miracle Order the most!

Three… no, not counting me, the two of you want to night-raid the Great Pure Palace? Why are you so determined to court death?

Even if there is a one-in-a-billion chance of success, how is that any different from turning yourselves in directly?

“This matter is not urgent. I have other plans.”

Halfway through, she paused slightly and turned to look at the unconscious Fang Ji beside her. “Help me arrange things for this young lady first.”

(PS: Fang Ji is actually male. His appearance is very delicate and feminine, so he is often mistaken for a girl by other characters.)

Shem glanced at Fang Ji, undisguised disgust on his face. “Understood. If you leave it to us, he won’t even have a splinter of bone left. He will miraculously disappear from this world!”

“That’s right, the elder and I have always kept our hands clean!” Salih chimed in.

“…” Lu Yibei raised a hand to her forehead and said irritably, “I mean, take good care of her, and send her back to the Zhenwu Mountain Scenic Area at daybreak. Don’t let anything go wrong!”

I still need Miss Fang’s help to infiltrate the Esoteric Society. If you make her vanish from the world, won’t I have to go myself?

Hearing this, Salih cast Shem a puzzled look. He could not understand why the Holy Son wanted to keep this person who reeked of misfortune and rot.

Seeing this, Shem thought for a moment, then his eyes lit up. He whispered, “No doubt the Holy Son wishes to use his misfortune to throw the Great Pure Palace into chaos, like poisoning it.”

“This…” Salih muttered quietly. “Wouldn’t that be a little despicable?”

“Do not speak recklessly! How can matters of miracles be called despicable?”

…

Seeing the two of them whispering to each other, Lu Yibei pondered for two seconds, then said, “Let’s leave it at that for today! Handle the matter I assigned to you properly. If there are no problems, I am going to create a miracle!”

Hearing this, Shem seemed to suddenly remember something and hurriedly said, “Please wait, Holy Son. Your subordinate still has a small matter to report!”

Lu Yibei tilted her head. “Speak!”

“Yes!” Shem said. “The two of us previously discovered someone following you with ill intent, so we took it upon ourselves to drive them back!”

“Can you determine who they were?”

“Your subordinate is incompetent and could not determine it. However, when we fought them, one of them dropped this!”

As he spoke, Shem took out a round object made of unknown metal from his bosom and presented it to Lu Yibei with both hands.

Complex lines were engraved on it, forming a polyhedral insignia. It seemed to be some kind of special badge.

“Oh?” Lu Yibei took the badge from Shem’s hands, examined it, and gradually frowned.

My psychic sense did detect someone following me earlier, and then they suddenly disappeared. So they did it?

I’ve never seen this badge before! Those people followed me after I left Moyue Pifeng. Could it be because I investigated Hu Chuan?

If that’s the case, then this badge is a very important clue!

After thinking for a moment, Lu Yibei nodded to Shem and said, “You did well. I’ll hold on to this for now. Go handle the matter I assigned you.”

“Understood!” Shem and Salih responded in unison, quickly walked over, lifted Fang Ji from the left and right, and swiftly left the alley.

Watching the three of them leave, Lu Yibei withdrew her gaze, looked at the badge she was toying with in her hand, and muttered to herself, “Have the Online Old Pervert look into it…”

“Right, and have him locate that Lin Nian too!”

————

11:34 p.m., in an old residential block two kilometers away from Sleepless Street.

For the fifth time, after confirming that “Gu Qianqian” had not sent her any messages to pester her, Lin Nian put away her phone and pushed up her round glasses.

“Gu Qianqian isn’t as impressive as I imagined!”

“She doesn’t even know where I live. What, can she follow the internet to come find trouble with me? I don’t even know what I was so scared of just now.”

After muttering to herself for a couple of lines, she shrugged, picked up the box of seafood wontons in her hand, and walked briskly toward the six-story building ahead.

These He Ji Seafood Wontons were something her grandfather loved to eat. Back when her grandfather had not yet fallen ill, every night after finishing work at Moyue Pifeng, he would go eat them.

She had finally earned a little money today, so on the way home, she brought a serving back for her grandfather.

In the building’s narrow stairwell, the light was dim. All kinds of small ads covered the walls, each taking its turn on stage, while a foul smell drifted in the air.

After entering the building, Lin Nian did not pause for a moment and soon returned to her home on the fourth floor.

“Grandpa, I’m back! Look what I brought you!”

Lin Nian had just set down her keys and called into the apartment when she looked up and saw the scene in the living room. In an instant, every hair on her body stood on end, and she froze in place.

The living room lights were off. The light from Sleepless Street outside the window outlined the things in the living room in vague contours.

Vaguely, she could see a person sitting on the sofa, facing the front door.

The person looked pitch-black all over, like the black culprit silhouette from Detective Conan had wandered onto the wrong set.

The instant Lin Nian looked at that person, they stood up soundlessly, pointed toward the bedroom where Lin Nian’s grandfather was, then slowly walked over, the weapon in their hand reflecting cold flashes of light.

An unsettling psychic energy fluctuation quietly enveloped the entire apartment.

Seeing this, Lin Nian’s heart leapt into her throat. She held her breath; sweat seeped across her forehead, and electric tingles spread through her palms.

Is-is that Gu Qianqian? How did she find my home? Was that gesture just now hinting that she had already attacked Grandpa?

Damn it, the rules of the jianghu say grudges don’t extend to family. Why doesn’t this Gu Qianqian follow the rules?

What do I do? What should I do?

Just as Lin Nian was burning with anxiety, the front door behind her was suddenly knocked on.

“Bang, bang, bang!”

The sudden sound behind her startled Lin Nian. Her body trembled, and the seafood wontons in her hand fell to the floor with a smack.

Immediately after, the knocking sounded again, even more violently.

“Bang, bang, bang!”

“Lin Nian, open the door! I know you’re in there. I heard sounds inside just now! If you’ve got the guts to swindle people, you’ve got the guts to open the door!”

“You swindled my, Gu Qianqian’s, money and think you can run? Believe it or not, I’ll swallow you alive!”

Lin Nian: “???”

Gu Qianqian? If the person outside the door is Gu Qianqian, then who is the person inside?

Thinking this, Lin Nian turned her head to look at the person advancing toward her. She saw that the person had stopped four or five steps away from her, their body hidden in the shadows. They raised a hand and made a shushing gesture at her, followed by a throat-slitting gesture.

Do not make a sound, or… die!

Seeing this, Lin Nian froze for a moment. Then she gritted her teeth, abruptly turned around, and pulled open the door…