World’s Cutest Alchemist

“Mmm…” I let out what barely qualified as a groan as my eyes slowly opened. Sunlight peeked through the blinds, but it wasn’t overbearing, so my eyes quickly got adjusted.

My head was buried in a pillow(?) and my arms were wrapped around a body pillow with a nice scent.

As things started to unblur, my mind began to clear from its groggy haze.

“Ah…I fell asleep.” I mumbled, squeezing the body pillow a little.

Mouse really has the best pillows. Strange, they didn’t seem to be items the last time I checked?

Eventually, I leaned back a little and finally saw the ‘pillow’ I was sleep-hugging: Mouse.

Oh. No wonder it was so comfy.

In my embrace was a sleeping Mouse. I had slept with my head buried in her side and arms wrapped around her stomach.

Carefully and slowly retreating, I sat up yawning, stretching my arms high.

What happened to the match? I wondered. I hope SG won.

Getting up, I yawned again as I left the room and headed to the bathroom.

I should bring a toothbrush here sometime… I thought as I washed my face. While I was at it, I might as well just bring an extra set of toiletries—if Mouse allowed it, but I’m sure she will.

This wasn’t the first time I slept over, and I doubted it’d be the last.

Leaving the bathroom, I checked the time: 7:34.

Strange. It’s so early yet I barely feel tired. Last time I slept over it was the same, does Mouse’s place have an early-bird trait built into it or something? If I were at home, I’d have slept until at least 11.

Shrugging, I didn’t dive deeper into it. What’s good is good.

In the kitchen, I grabbed some ingredients to make breakfast. The menu was the classic chocolate chip pancakes, eggs, and bacon.

…

“Mm…” I hummed, flipping a pancake.

The delectable scent of breakfast wafted through the air. Of course I nibbled on some of the scraps while I cooked. I wouldn’t be human if I didn’t.

As I flipped over a pancake, I heard a door sound from behind me. Glancing over, I saw a Mouse with severe bed-head. She was rubbing her eyes and scratching her stomach.

She froze when she saw me and quickly penguin-walked to the bathroom.

A few minutes later, she left the bathroom with neatened hair. During this time, I had plated breakfast and set it on the table. While I waited, I started to clean up.

“Morning!” I said with a smile.

“Good morning…” Mouse replied, her voice low due to just waking up. She took a seat, “Thank you for cooking.” She said with a yawn.

“Of course!” I paused the cleaning and took a seat next to her.

“It smells delicious…” She stretched her words and had a ‘sleepy voice’ which sounded nice.

“Who do you think cooked it?” I said with pride and smugness, puffing out my chest.

Mouse gave a small laugh through her nose with a slight smile before starting to eat.

The way her eyes widened when she took a bite before she started to eat a little faster really makes cooking for others worth it.

Is this what they mean when they say ‘seeing you eat so well makes me feel full’?

When I caught Mouse side-eying me, I quickly began to eat.

…

A little later, we were both finished eating and cleaning our mess.

I was quite excited for today, there were so many things to do.

“Mm~” I hummed, scrubbing a plate clean.

Then, I remembered something I was curious about.

“Who won last night?” I asked.

“SG beat them in a 2-0.” Mouse answered with a smile.

“Oh~ That’s good news. Did anything exciting happen during the round?”

“Hayley won a 3 on 1 situation. She locked in and the commentators were going crazy.”

“Wow, impressive. I’ll have to watch the highlights later.”

“You should,” Mouse nodded, “If you watch it in your own time, I won’t be shaken like a can of soda.”

“Mm…I should wait to watch it until you’re next to me then.”

“…” Mouse stared at me with blinking eyes.

“Hehe.” I giggled.

After chatting for a bit longer, it was time for me to head home. Mouse didn’t mind if I stayed longer, but I had stuff to do at home.

So, she kindly drove me home and a little later I was back in my apartment.

“Ah~Smells like home.” I said, taking in a deep breath.

The first thing I did was check my plants.

I hadn’t tried for another C+ grade strawberry plant since the first one, but it was on my to-do list. I’ve just been busy with other things that I hadn’t had the time to get around to it.

After making sure everything was fine in the garden, I checked my potion supply. I kept everything in my living room closet—which might be a fire hazard, but it’s fine as long as nothing explodes, right?

I usually kept a hundred of each potion in storage—a minimum stock of sorts. Everything after that was free to sell, but recently, I’ve only been selling mana potions.

Speaking of, I’ve stocked up quite a bit of mana potions—over 300 at this point. The reason I sell 20 a day is all part of the strategy. Limited availability? Or whatever it’s called. I read somewhere that keeping a limited amount sold per day makes it more valuable or something like that.

I don’t know business acumen. I just do as suggested.

So, today too, I planned to sell 20 mana potions. After I brew 20 more, I’ll sell the oldest ones in my stock.

“Mm…” I glanced at my bouncy bouncy potion supply.

I’ve only made about 30 of them so far. I’ll probably get to around 200 before I start selling them? I’m still working on perfecting it, but it’s good enough for now.

“So much to do, so much~” I hummed. Though I sounded like I was complaining, I was actually quite happy with the situation. It feels motivating to have stuff to do.

And everything I do is working towards one of my short-term goals—a cauldron.

There was no reason not to be satisfied.

Exiting the closet, I headed to my room and got dressed in my tower climbing outfit. I’ll probably get a new outfit soon, but for now there’s no need.

I glanced at my computer but turned my head away soon after.

There was no point in reading a strategy guide. At least for these tutorial floors. It’s all the same.

Floor 1 was 5 goblins.

Floor 2 was 10.

Floor 3 was 10 goblins with different weapons.

Floor 4 was the exact same but was half the starting time.

What could floor 5 be? Who wants to guess?

Yes, it was probably just adding more goblins or lessening the starting time.

Rather than wasting an hour reading through stuff I already know just to end up throwing a gluetrap potion and dynokali potion was worthless. I could spend that hour on brewing potions or researching recipes instead.

So, like usual, I stocked my pouch with my standard potion set-up and drank each buff potion.

[Your skin toughens.]

[You feel a little faster.]

[You feel a little stronger.]

[You feel a little more focused.]

[Your perception increases.]

At some point, I need to upgrade these and come up with a better recipe for them.

I strapped my dagger to a sheath on my hip and headed to the bathroom.

[Would you like to enter the tower?]

[You have reached the limit of floor clears for Floor 4, entering will bring you to Floor 5.]

[Confirm?]

[Y/N]

[Current Floor: 4]

‘Yes’

[Entering Floor 5]

[We wish you luck.]

Like usual, the sight of plains unfolded before me. The beautiful sky, verdant grass, and slight wind was all too familiar at this point.

It seems to stay this way at least until the 10th floor too. Yesterday’s league match had the teams play on the 10th floor in the first round. Should I expect to start seeing villages soon?

I spotted Rocky and just as I was about to take a step, I froze.

My hands reached for my pouch—not there. My dagger? Gone.

“Huh…?”

[Modifier Floor: Itemless]

…

[Modifier Floors and all you need to know!]

Author: TowerExplorer

Modifier floors are exactly as the name implies! They are floors with a modifier added to them! Every 5 floors will be a modifier floor.

And sometimes, tower events will have a modifier attached.

Modifiers vastly vary. They can be detrimental to some people, or even beneficial to others.

It’s important to make sure you know what kind of modifier will be on the floor you attempt to conquer. Planning around the modifier will make your climb extremely easier. On the contrary, ignoring the modifier could make it significantly more difficult.

Some examples of modifiers include: [Skill-less], [Stronger Enemies], [Weaker Enemies], [Buffless], [Neutrality], [Class System], [Gravity Multiplier], and the dreaded [Itemless].

On this post, we’ll talk about the very first modifier floor you’ll come into contact to when you climb the tower: [Itemless].

[Itemless] is a dreaded modifier for all climbers. Though simple, it’s one of, if not the most problematic.

[Itemless] doesn’t allow you to use anything classified as an [Item] on the floor. Weapons, equipment, utility? All of it is worthless with this modifier.

This modifier comes into play on the 5th floor and has not been seen since. No one knows the purpose of this, maybe the tower just wants to instill doubt or fear in your mind, or maybe it’s a warning for possible things to come on future floors we have yet to explore. In any case, it’s lucky that this modifier appears early, when the enemies are handleable.

Onto tips and tricks for this modifier,

I recommend purchasing weapons or equipment from outside the exchange. You need to buy things that don’t classify as an [Item]—something with a grade and description.

Thankfully, for most combat classes this won’t be a problem as you have skills and mana to use. However, for production-classes there is no worse type of floor.

The standard purchase would be a gun, however, using one would disqualify you from the leaderboards and lessen your rewards.

Of course, that’s assuming you’re solo. If you’re a production-class whose been solo until the 5th floor, congratulations, but I recommend stopping here and forming a team unless you don’t care about the leaderboards or rewards.

If you’re in a team, a capable combat class will easily be able to carry you.

And, if you apply buffs before the floor, they stay applied during the conquest.

And finally, the monster on the 5th floor is…

…

“Ah…” My panicked hands reached for my thigh and dagger only to connect with skin.

“M-my potions? My dagger? W-where are they?” I searched the grass for any signs of my equipment. They weren’t there.

“P-potions…D-dagger…W-what’s going on!?” I instinctively started to shout.

Where were they!? Why did they disappear?!

The holographic screen drew my attention.

[Modifier Floor: Itemless]

[Itemless: All items are forbidden on this floor.]

“A-A-Ah…” My mouth opened wide and I fell to my knees.

“I-is this a joke?”

“You’re joking, right?”

“Tower…Y-you’re…”

[Floor 5 Objective: Eliminate the hobgoblin.]

[0/1]

[Hobgoblin spawning in 4:59]

“Ah…”

I stared blankly at screen.

“N-No…”

“T…This is ridiculous!” I screamed, “Stop joking! Give me my potions! Give me my dagger! Give me something!”

No one responded to my shouts.

“Stop playing with me!”

“Please!”

I slammed my fist into the dirt.

Yet, there was no reply. There’d never be a reply.

[Hobgoblin spawning in 4:39]

“Ah…”

It wasn’t a joke. The tower doesn’t lie. It never does.

My potions were gone. My weapon was gone. Everything was gone.

A hobgoblin—an evolved goblin with lighter skin and far more deadly than any regular goblin. I had briefly seen them during the league match yesterday.

Hayley could easily dispatch them within seconds.

But, I’m not Hayley.

I’m just me…

My vision started to blur and my cheeks started to feel slippery.

And I know it.

I’m going to die.