Lewd System: Every Scream and Moan is EXP

Chapter 260: Chapter 260 : She is letting it all out

Astrid turned hearing that voice and there he stood.

Same posture. Same unbothered face. Same folded arms that made her want to rip them clean off his body and beat him with them until that expression finally changed.

Behind him stood Roxana. And around her, Seris, Seraphina, and Elira. All of them looking at Astrid with varying degrees of concern that she didn’t ask for and didn’t want.

Seris spoke first. ”Professor, it’s not the time to—”

Jax cut her off. ”Leave this instance.... All of you.”

Roxana stepped forward hesitantly. ”She’s injured and I don’t think it’s the right time to—”

Jax’s tone dropped heavier. ”I said leave us alone. I need to talk to her.”

No one dared say another word. They retreated slowly, each of them glancing back at Astrid’s condition, at the bloody hands and the cuts and the swollen knuckles and the nose that had only recently stopped bleeding. Then they were gone.

When the last footsteps faded, Jax spoke. ”You think that was a win?”

Astrid’s jaw tightened.

”That boy held back. You thought grabbing a sharp blade was a wise choice? I guarantee his survival instincts were screaming at him to not hold back. And in that moment, if he had listened, you would have lost most of your fingers along with taking a heavy blow to the stomach that you left wide open with that gap in your guard.”

His voice carried no anger just cold assessment which was somehow worse.

”If he had chosen to swing his sword with his full strength, you wouldn’t be standing in front of me right now. He lost because his mind panicked. He didn’t know what to do in the split second where he had the choice between winning the match by making you suffer and ultimately making himself suffer because of the position you hold. Or more precisely, because of your father.”

His eyes didn’t waver.

”In that decision making, you had the last laugh. Not because you were better out there. But because that poor boy hesitated.”

That was enough.

Every ounce of restraint Astrid had been holding together since the first day of this tournament snapped at once. Her fist launched toward his face. Fueled by every scrap of rage that had been burning through her body for days.

All of her remaining strength packed into one punch aimed at the jaw of the man who had just dissected her victory and tossed it in the trash.

Jax caught her fist.

His hand wrapped around hers mid-flight and held it frozen in the air. He looked down at her knuckles. Scanned the wounds that were closing slowly but still looked terrible and Bloody. The hand of someone who had stopped caring about their own body a long time ago.

Then he looked directly into her eyes. ”I didn’t expect this from you.”

She tried to break free. Every muscle in her arm strained against his grip. She twisted. Pulled. Threw her weight backward. He didn’t let go.

And that powerlessness, that inability to move, to escape, to do anything, broke her entirely.

”I waited for you this whole damn time!” Her voice cracked open like a dam she had been patching with bare hands for days.

”Waited to hear just a single word of appreciation from you! The same way every single other person around you gets! But I was a fool to even think of it!”

Her eyes burned.

”I was a fool to fight for you! And you know what I was fighting my ass off for?! Because I didn’t want you to leave the academy! That’s why I was pushing myself to the edge every single match! But what did I get in return?!”

Her voice broke further. ”Forget appreciation. I got a remark showing how small I was. How pathetic I was.”

She laughed at herself. The kind of laugh that carried no humor, only the bitter taste of someone who had finally reached the bottom of their own well and found nothing there.

Tears started falling down her face.

”I hate you. I hate every single thing about you. Your arrogance. Your attitude. The way you look at others like they matter and then look right through me like I’m made of glass.”

Her voice dropped to something broken. Something low and honest that couldn’t hide behind anger anymore.

”And yet I don’t know why I still want to be around you. Why I still want the same treatment everyone else gets. Why seeing you protect Lilith makes me jealous. Why seeing you protect Elira makes me feel the same. Why seeing you bet your career for Seraphina makes me distant. Why seeing you being protective toward Seris makes me feel like I’m being left behind. And leave the fact how you... that demon girl Nerith...”

She swallowed the sob building in her throat.

”But I kept forgetting. Again and again. That I was never someone important in your life. Say whatever bullshit you spouted before in that cave to tell me how I mattered. But I’m not a fool to fall for that.”

Her tears were falling freely now. No pretense. No wall left to hide behind.

”Because if you actually cared about me. Even a fraction. You would have been here. When I didn’t know what was happening to me. When my own head was eating me alive. When I was destroying myself in that arena and didn’t even know why.”

A painful grin twisted her lips. ”But you weren’t here. You were with them. You were there for Seraphina. For Elira. For everyone except the one person who was falling apart.”

She pulled her wrist one more time.

And He let go this time.

She took a step back. Wiped her tears with her forearm so roughly it left a red mark across her skin. Then she straightened herself and Forced her spine into something that looked like resolve even though everything inside was collapsing.

”So forget it. All of it. I know where I stand now. And after today, I’ll erase every trace of you from my head. And if any memory crawls back, I’ll make sure it comes back rotten. Poisoned. Something I can hate instead of... .”

She sniffed. Blinked the last tears away.

”But don’t worry. I’ll still fight for you in the finals. I’ll give my all.”

Jax, who had been listening without moving, without interrupting, without so much as shifting his weight, finally spoke.

”Are you done?”

Silence fell between them. And something told Astrid that whatever words followed would pinch her soul harder than anything she had just said.

”So that’s it.” His voice was quieter now. Not cold. Not heavy. Something else. ”That’s the reason my ace has been falling apart.”

The word ace felt foreign in her ears. She heard it but couldn’t process it. As if the word belonged to a language she had forgotten or rather it wasn’t meant for her.

”Astrid, I had high hopes for you. And that’s the reason I chose you. That’s the reason I was relieved when I saw this particular gauntlet event on the schedule. I thought I had this one secured. I knew you would hand me the victory before you were even added to the roster. I knew it the moment I understood this tournament’s format.”

She stared at him.

”And as for me not showing up for your matches?” He tilted his head. ”Why would I waste my time spectating a match I already know the result of?”

Astrid blinked through the remaining tears. Confusion replacing the anger. ”What... what did you just say?”

”I saw you during our fight with the demons. My eyes were on you the entire time. The way you massacred them. The way your rage drove you to heights that none of the veteran elf soldiers around you could reach. Not even close.”

He paused.

”And while studying you, I discovered something important. Your mana core isn’t normal. You were constantly using magic throughout that battle, but you never completely ran out. Why? Because your mana core replenishes itself faster than any person I have ever seen. That was your true advantage in a prolonged fight. That and your courage.”

His voice carried something she hadn’t heard from him before. Not praise exactly. But acknowledgment.

”From that observation alone, I knew one thing. Nobody could defeat you in this gauntlet. Not just because of your blessing. But because of your stubbornness. Your courage. Your attitude. And because I had faith in you.”

The last four words landed somewhere deep in her chest.

”But I think my assumptions were all wrong.” His voice shifted. Heavier. ”I failed. Because I heard today that you were breaking. That you weren’t fighting like the person I thought you were. The one I had pictured in my head as the victor of this entire event.”

Understanding crashed into Astrid all at once. He had noticed her. Not just now. From the beginning. He had seen her when she thought she was invisible.

He had chosen her when she thought she was being ignored. He had placed his faith in her when she thought she was being discarded.

Something warm bloomed in her chest.

But then it died. Another thought crawled in and strangled it before it could take root.

She said, ”But that still doesn’t answer any of the other thoughts of mine.” Her voice steadied into something flat and tired. ”And your answer just confirms it. You still treat me as a weapon. You still see me as an ace to be played. Pushing aside what I’m actually going through just so you can win.”