That Day When Suzuki-kun Wasn't the Mob-B!

”....”

Suzuki stood completely frozen. The cold night wind rustled through the dark canopy of the forest, but he couldn’t feel it. Every single alarm bell in his newly optimized biology was screaming at him to run.

A bear? He could absolutely suplex a bear. With the Manager calculating the optimal leverage, joint locks, and weak points, he could easily snap a grizzly’s neck and sell its gallbladder for a massive profit on the black market.

But the creature bleeding out in the clearing before them wasn’t a bear.

It was a literal, towering mountain of emerald scales, razor-sharp spines, and catastrophic magical energy. It was a dragon—a genuine, mythological apocalypse-bringer. Even lying heavily on the forest floor, its massive chest heaving with ragged, labored breaths, the sheer pressure radiating from its body made the surrounding air feel thick and suffocating.

Deep within Suzuki’s mind, the Manager was aggressively flashing red warning signals.

[ALERT. Mythological Entity Detected: Chaos Dragon.]

[Threat Level: Immeasurable. Combat probability of survival: 0.0001%.]

[Recommendation: Immediate Evacuation.]

Yeah, no kidding, Suzuki thought, a cold sweat breaking out across his forehead. Evacuation sounds like a fantastic idea.

He slowly reached out, planning to grab Kobayashi by the collar of her messy suit, throw her over his shoulder, and sprint back to the safety of modern civilization.

”Ooooh! What is this? A movie set?!”

Before Suzuki could even twitch, Kobayashi stumbled forward. Completely blinded by the heroic amount of sake she had chugged and driven by the reckless courage of a severely overworked, incredibly horny corporate slave, she marched straight up to the towering beast.

”Senpai! Wait! Stop!” Suzuki hissed desperately, afraid that raising his voice might provoke the monster to instantly vaporize them.

Kobayashi didn’t listen. She swayed on her feet, clutching her half-empty bottle of sake, and squinted up at the colossal, terrifying reptilian head. The dragon’s massive, golden reptilian eyes—each one easily the size of a compact car—slowly shifted to glare down at the tiny, fragile humans.

”FOOLISH HUMANS,” the dragon rumbled, its voice echoing like an earthquake, vibrating directly through the soles of Suzuki’s shoes. ”HAVE YOU COME TO MOCK MY DEMISE? OR TO STEAL MY SCALES?”

Normally, a human would instantly void their bowels and pass out from sheer terror.

Kobayashi just burped.

”Whoa, the animatronic actually talks,” she slurred, reaching out and casually slapping the dragon’s massive snout. ”You look like you’re in a lot of pain, buddy. Did the management dump a weekend project on you, too?”

”....”

The dragon was absolutely speechless.

Suzuki was also speechless. Did the alcohol completely fry her survival instincts?! She was actively treating an apex predator of the magical world like a disgruntled coworker!

”I AM NOT SOME... CORPORATE DRONE,” the dragon growled weakly, a massive pool of glowing, magical blood pooling beneath its side. ”I AM TOHRU. A CHAOS DRAGON. AND I AM DYING. LEAVE ME, HUMAN, LEST I ROAST YOU ALIVE.”

It was only then that Suzuki noticed it. Sticking out of the dragon’s massive, armored back was a gigantic, glowing broadsword. It radiated a sickeningly pure, intense holy light that violently clashed with the dragon’s dark, chaotic aura. It was a divine weapon—a god-slaying blade actively burning the creature from the inside out.

At the same time, he also realized that this dragon was the heroine of the story, Tohru, which was something that he had never expected to encounter her in this place right away, in just a day, after he was being punished with a two-week suspension, but this also made him feel relaxed somehow, knowing the identity of this dragon.

”Hmm? You’ve got a giant stick on your back,” Kobayashi pointed out lazily, completely unfazed by the threat of being roasted alive. She took another chug of her sake. ”Want me to pull it out?”

The dragon’s golden eyes widened in shock. ”PULL IT OUT? IT IS A HOLY SWORD FORGED BY THE GODS. A MERE MORTAL COULD NEVER—”

”Suzuki, come here and help me,” Kobayashi commanded, tossing her sake bottle aside.

”Senpai, are you serious?!” Suzuki whispered fiercely, finally closing the distance and grabbing her arm. He knew the original story, yet this was still a reality, okay? Even he had to admit that he would be lying if he wasn’t nervous, even if he felt a bit relaxed, knowing that this dragon was Tohru, or rather, how could anyone be calmed down when they saw the legendary creature known as a dragon?

”That is a dragon! If we pull that sword out, it might just eat us the second it heals!”

”Oh, don’t be a coward,” Kobayashi pouted, leaning her weight against his chest. She looked up at him, her eyes hazy with alcohol and lust. ”If you help me pull this out, I promise I’ll let you do whatever you want to me in the bushes right after.”

”....”

Suzuki stared at her. He looked at the giant, dying chaos dragon. Then he looked at the dark bushes.

”...”

Manager, Suzuki, called internally. Can I physically remove a divine-grade weapon?

[Calculating... Affirmative. The host’s physical parameters have evolved beyond standard human limitations. By applying maximum kinetic force and bypassing the holy aura’s rejection mechanism, the sword can be extracted.]

Suzuki let out a long, heavy sigh. He was practically playing Russian Roulette with a nuclear bomb, but between the sheer absurdity of the situation, his senior’s lewd promise, and a strange, lingering sense of pity for the dying creature... he found himself walking toward the dragon’s back.

”WHAT ARE YOU DOING?!” Tohru roared weakly as the two humans climbed up the side of her massive, scaly body.

”Just hold still!” Kobayashi grunted, slipping on the slick blood.

Suzuki planted his feet firmly against the dragon’s incredibly tough scales. He reached out and grabbed the hilt of the glowing holy sword. The moment his hands made contact, a searing, burning heat tried to violently repel him. But Suzuki’s body wasn’t normal anymore. He tightened his grip, ignoring the holy interference, and braced his back.

”On three,” Suzuki said, wrapping Kobayashi’s hands over his own so she wouldn’t fall. ”One. Two. Three!”

With a brutal, full-body heave fueled by his optimized musculature, Suzuki ripped upward.

SHHHHLLLLUK!

The massive holy sword violently slid out of the dragon’s flesh. A geyser of glowing blood erupted into the night air. Suzuki threw the massive, heavy blade aside, letting it crash into the dirt where its divine light immediately flickered and died.

”RRROOOOOOOOAAAAAARRRRR!”

Tohru let out a deafening, earth-shattering roar of pure relief. The suffocating holy pressure instantly vanished, and her chaotic magic flooded back into her system, rapidly knitting the massive wound closed in a matter of seconds.

Suzuki quickly grabbed Kobayashi by the waist, leaping off the dragon’s back and landing safely on the forest floor before they could be crushed by the creature’s thrashing.

The colossal green dragon slowly lifted her head. The dying haze in her golden eyes had completely evaporated, replaced by an overwhelming, terrifying vitality. She loomed over them, casting a massive, suffocating shadow that completely blotted out the moonlight.

”See? All better,” Kobayashi smiled drunkenly, casually dusting off her suit. She looked up at the terrifying apex predator. ”Now, are you going to eat us, or what? Because I have a very important, very dirty date waiting for me in those bushes.”

”....”

Suzuki just facepalmed. If they actually survived the next ten seconds, he was going to make absolutely sure she wouldn’t be able to walk to work on Sunday.

But right at that moment, a notification was heard from the Manager.

[The Holy Sword has been acquired.]

”Hm...”

It seemed that good deeds truly were always rewarded.