The Captain's Dirty Little Secret

Chapter 406: Chapter 406 - Going Back

”You think I don’t know that?”

Dylan paused, probably because Roxie’s voice came out sharper than he expected. She had been willing to agree with him when the argument was about conditioning. Zac had barely been in Tennessee long enough to settle into the apartment, and every day he came home talking about how closely the coaches watched them, how one bad practice could cost somebody reps and how every freshman was competing against somebody who wanted the exact same spot.

Roxie understood that. She was the one telling Zac to stay.

What pissed her off was Dylan looking at her like she was the reason Zac had forgotten all of it.

”I know football matters,” she continued, shoving the last shirt into her bag. ”That’s why I already told him I’m going alone.”

Dylan nodded. ”I heard you.”

”Then stop talking to me like I’m asking him to leave.”

”I’m not.”

”You keep saying that while doing exactly that.”

Zac stepped farther into the room. ”Dylan, enough.”

Dylan looked at him, frustrated now. ”What? She asked what I meant.”

”And she answered you. She’s going alone.”

”That doesn’t change the fact that you were ready to go with her.”

Roxie stopped packing.

There it was again.

She turned toward him. ”Why does that sound like my problem?”

Dylan exhaled and rubbed the back of his neck. ”I’m saying he has to start thinking about what happens when he misses things here.”

”Then tell him.”

”I am telling him.”

”No, you’re looking at me.”

Dylan’s eyes shifted away for a moment before coming back to her. ”Because you’re the reason he wants to leave.”

Roxie laughed once, more out of disbelief than amusement. ”Karen disappearing is the reason I’m leaving. Zac deciding he needs to follow me is his own damn decision.”

”I know you didn’t tell him to come.”

”Then what exactly do you want from me?”

”I want him to realize he can’t keep doing this.”

Zac’s face hardened. ”Keep doing what?”

”Dropping everything.”

”For one fucking day?”

”You don’t know it’ll only be one day.”

”Neither do you.”

Dylan looked toward Roxie again. ”That’s my point.”

Roxie felt her temper finally snap.

”No. Your point keeps changing every time I answer you. First, it’s conditioning. Fine. I agree. Then it’s his spot. Fine, I agree with that too. Now apparently, I’m some fucking emergency that keeps pulling him away when I have literally been standing here telling him to stay.”

”I didn’t call you an emergency.”

”You didn’t have to.”

”Roxie.”

Zac’s voice was quieter this time, but she was already too irritated to stop.

She pointed toward Dylan. ”He has been here for ten minutes acting like you’re about to ruin your life because I called you. I didn’t even ask you to come. I told you the opposite.”

Dylan’s jaw tightened. ”And you think that changes the fact that he was ready to?”

Roxie stared at him.

For the first time, she understood that this was the part Dylan actually cared about. It was not really about what she had asked Zac to do. Dylan was angry about how quickly Zac had decided on his own.

Zac must have realized the same thing because his expression changed.

”Get out.”

Dylan looked at him. ”Seriously?”

”Yeah.”

”I’m trying to help.”

”I know what you’re trying to do. Go home.”

Dylan stood there another second before adjusting his bag on his shoulder. The anger disappeared from his face enough that he looked toward Roxie and said, ”I hope you find her and she’s okay. I mean that.”

Roxie still wanted to tell him to go fuck himself, but she believed that part.

”Yeah. Me too.”

Dylan left without saying anything else.

The apartment door closed, and Roxie immediately went back to her bag because she had already wasted enough time arguing about football while Karen was still missing.

Zac stayed in the bedroom doorway.

”He shouldn’t have said that.”

Roxie zipped the bag. ”He thinks I’m going to ruin football for you.”

”He gets like this about football.”

”Apparently.”

”He’s wrong.”

Roxie looked at him. ”Is he?”

”Yes.”

”You were ready to miss conditioning.”

”For you.”

”That doesn’t make it better.”

”To me it does.”

Roxie let out a frustrated breath and sat on the edge of the bed. She wanted Zac with her. That was the part she hated admitting because Dylan had somehow managed to make wanting her boyfriend beside her feel selfish. If Zac came, she would feel better. She would have somebody to drive if she got tired, somebody to sit beside her on the flight, somebody who remembered what River Road had done to her when her brain started imagining Karen in another car somewhere.

But Zac had a reason to be in Tennessee right now. Karen had parents searching for her, police involved and Roxie going back because she knew Karen well enough to help. Zac leaving conditioning would add one more person to the search while risking something he had worked years to get.

She looked up at him. ”I already booked one ticket.”

Zac frowned. ”You booked it before I got here?”

”Yeah.”

”You could’ve booked two.”

”I could’ve. I didn’t.”

”Roxie.”

”I need you to stay.”

He walked farther into the room. ”You want me to stay.”

”No. I need you to.”

”That makes no sense.”

”It does to me.”

Zac crouched in front of her, resting his hands on her knees. ”You’re scared.”

”I know.”

”And you’re going back there alone.”

”I’ll be on a plane with like a hundred people.”

”You know what I mean.”

Roxie looked down at him. ”If you come with me, I’m going to spend the whole trip thinking about what you’re missing here. I’ll already be thinking about Karen. I don’t need both.”

”That sounds like something Dylan put in your head.”

”He pissed me off. He didn’t invent your schedule.”

Zac looked away.

Roxie reached down and touched his face. ”You wanted this.”

”I still want it.”

”Then stay here and do it.”

”And what if you need me?”

”I’ll call you.”

”That’s not the same.”

”I know.”

He stayed quiet long enough that Roxie could see he still hated every part of it. She did too. A selfish part of her wanted him to ignore everything she was saying, throw clothes into a bag and come anyway. That was exactly why she needed him to stay.

Zac had spent months choosing her automatically, even when the choice cost him something, and Roxie had no intention of letting his first weeks in Tennessee become another thing he bent around her life.

”My flight leaves in a few hours,” she said. ”You can take me to the airport.”

”That’s all I get?”

Roxie almost smiled. ”You can carry my bag too.”

”Wow.”

”I know. Lucky.”

His mouth moved slightly, although he still looked unhappy.

”Fine.”

”Fine?”

”I’m taking you to the airport. I’m staying here. I hate it.”

”You’re allowed.”

”And you’re calling me when you land.”

”Yes.”

”When you find Karen.”

”Yes.”

”If you change locations.”

”Zac.”

”I’m serious.”

”I know.”

He stood and pulled her up with him, wrapping his arms around her before she could reach for the bag. Roxie held him tightly and closed her eyes against his chest.

For a moment, the whole argument with Dylan disappeared.

She could hear Zac breathing above her, feel the dampness still clinging to the back of his training shirt and smell the soap from whatever locker room shower he had probably taken too quickly. He had rushed home because she called.

That thought made her chest hurt for an entirely different reason.

”I’m going to find her,” she murmured.

”I know.”

”She’s probably just pissed somewhere.”

”Probably.”

”She better be.”

Zac rubbed her back. ”You can yell at her when you find her.”

”Angela already told me I’m allowed to kill her after I make sure, she’s alive.”

”That sounds like Angela.”

Roxie finally laughed, although it came out weak.

They left the apartment less than half an hour later.

Zac drove because Roxie kept checking her phone every few minutes. Mrs. Bianchi had sent another message saying Karen still had not turned her phone on. Her father had checked the house, two friends and one of the places she used to go before she started drinking heavily. Police had her description and were checking her car information.

Nothing.

Roxie stared at the screen until Zac reached across the center console and took her hand.

”She’ll turn up.”

”You don’t know that.”

”No.”

At least he did not pretend.

Roxie squeezed his hand and looked out the window.

The closer they got to the airport, the quieter she became. She had only been in Tennessee a little over a week and already hated the thought of leaving their apartment behind, even temporarily. That surprised her. Briarwick had been home for most of her life, yet Tennessee had started settling around her faster than she expected.

Now she was going back because Karen had disappeared.

The airport was busy enough that Zac had to circle before finding somewhere to stop. Roxie unfastened her seat belt while he got out and pulled her bag from the back.

He handed it to her but kept one hand on the handle.

”Call me.”

”I will.”

”You keep saying that like I’m annoying you.”

”You are annoying me.”

”Good.”

Roxie looked at him for a moment before stepping closer and wrapping her arms around his neck.

Zac hugged her immediately.

”I love you,” he said against her hair.

”I love you too.”

”Find her.”

”I will.”

He kissed her before finally letting go.

Roxie took the bag and walked toward the entrance. She made it several steps before looking back.

Zac was still standing beside the car watching her.

She lifted her hand.

He did the same.

Then Roxie went inside.

Her phone stayed in her hand through security, while she found the gate and even after she sat down. Karen’s messages remained unanswered. Angela had sent three updates asking whether she had heard anything. Mrs. Bianchi still had nothing.

Roxie rested the back of her head against the seat and looked through the wide airport windows.

Hours ago she had been sitting at their dining table choosing college courses.

Now she was flying back to Briarwick because nobody knew where Karen was.

Her phone buzzed.

For one stupid second her heart jumped because she thought it might be Karen.

It was Zac.

At least tell me when you board.

Roxie smiled despite herself.

Boarding soon. Go rest.

His reply came quickly.

Can’t.

She knew exactly what he meant.

Roxie looked back at Karen’s silent conversation and tightened her grip on the phone.

Wherever Karen had gone, Roxie was going to find her.

And when she did, Karen was going to have a lot of explaining to do.