Data-Driven Daoist

Yu Han picked up the stick and threw it. The crab scurried after the stick, caught it, then brought it to Yu Han’s feet again.

Yu Han threw it again.

It fetched it.

After a few rounds, Yu Han picked the crab up and shouted, “You remember!”

It remembers how to play fetch! Buddy, I think I just solved your problem.

The crab wiggled its legs mid-air, its eyes rotating like a windmill.

“Can I play too?” Huang Niuniu asked, fiddling with her fingers and peeking up at them.

Yu Han set the crab down and handed over the stick. She threw it with all her might and it flew far outside the fence, down the ledge, and into a bush. The crab stared at her, clicking its pincers. To Yu Han, it sounded either annoyed or excited—or both.

Huang Niuniu blushed.

The crab raced away. It was small enough now to duck under the fence. “I thought you said it forgot how to play this game,” Huang Niuniu said.

“Something happened yesterday. I went into the crabscape.”

“Crab-what?”

“The other side of the hole it punches into my dream—Ouch, don’t pinch me! I didn’t go in at first. It tricked me—ow! Why’re you still pinching me?”

“Don’t let a crab trick you.” Huang Niuniu pressed her lips. “You’re the idea-man. You can’t be tricked.”

“I think you overestimate my intelligence,” Yu Han said. He glanced at his stats. Intelligence was still 14. “If your expectations are too high, that’s too much pressure.”

She let go of his hand and crossed her arms. “So what happened?”

“There was a pond and—huh?” Yu Han asked.

The crab returned. The stick was missing. Instead, it had fetched Li Yao and Fang Zhao.

The crustacean limped to Huang Niuniu’s feet, then rolled over. Its legs jerked towards the sky as though zapped by electricity.

“Oh, you poor thing.” She picked it up.

But the crab struggled, then jumped out of her arms. It scuttled to the hole in the yard, grew in size, and nestled itself in like a rock. A few seconds later, it was a boulder again.

“You made it sad,” Yu Han said accusatorily.

Huang Niuniu’s eyes welled up with tears. “I-I’ll go make the Spite. Explain the story later.” She ran off past a surprised Fang Zhao and Li Yao, dashing towards her hut.

“What’s with the crab?” Li Yao asked. “Tubs, is it for dinner?”

“Not this one.”

Fang Zhao bowed. Then the still-injured boy fell to his knees, finally kowtowing.

“Oi!” Yu Han took a step back.

What followed was the most snivelling expression of gratitude he had ever seen in this life. He and Li Yao had to threaten Fang Zhao at blade-point; the endless words of thanks wouldn’t stop coming out, and it creeped out the Johan part of Yu Han in ways he didn’t know were possible.

The guy was resolute even then, and only the threat of silent treatment finally made him shut up.

They headed to Huang Niuniu’s afterwards. Before opening the door, Yu Han gave both boys a stern glare. The two were already tearing up from the smell.

“What you’re about to see stays between us. Break this trust, and that’s it,” Yu Han said. “Not even to Li Weidong’s group.”

“Wow, tubs, what kinda treasure you got in there, other than your wife?” Li Yao joked. “The smell is as fragrant as dead dogs.”

But his eyes were serious when he gave a firm agreement.

“May the heavens smite me otherwise,” Fang Zhao said with a nod.

Yu Han opened the door to find Huang Niuniu ultra-depressed as she brewed the Spite. A few minutes later, they sat on the mat with a bowl of the concoction.

“Tubs…” Li Yao stared at the thing, sweat gathering on his forehead.

“Thank me later.” Yu Han gulped it down. Fang Zhao and Huang Niuniu followed, the latter even licking her lips.

Li Yao sighed and followed suit.

Yu Han didn’t tell them where they got the recipe. He grabbed his second serving and finished it too. The taste somehow got better every time he had it. Even the stink that rose up from his stomach and into his nose felt homely.

“We’re out of spirit stones for real now,” Huang Niuniu said. “We’ll have to sell the cores.”

“It doesn’t make sense to hold onto them at this point.” They’d already given the core of the ghoul boss away.

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“But the Alchemy formulas… Maybe I can ask for a relevant one from Senior Feral Spot?”

“Don’t!” Yu Han said. “You need a proper Martial Art.”

“Are you calling my flower dance ugly?”

“It’s very pretty,” Yu Han said. “But the ghouls don’t appreciate it enough.”

Fang Zhao interrupted them with a cough. He placed a pouch on the floor with his good hand.

“Please take this.” It was the same pouch containing the thousand spirit stones token. “Sister Huang was kind to give it back before, but with all the help I’ve received, I won’t be able to sleep well if I don’t contribute—”

Huang Niuniu snatched the pouch up so fast Fang Zhao was left staring, round-eyed, at his empty hands.

“Thanks,” the girl said as she hid it in her bosom. “This’ll last a long time, even with us four.”

“I can’t take it for free either,” Li Yao said, slapping his thigh. “Tubs will pay my share!”

“Fuck off.”

Li Yao tossed a pouch over to Huang Niuniu. “I’ll give more. Just ask. I’m Level 2 now, I can earn more money.” He laughed.

Yu Han’s face fell.

“You jealous?” Li Yao grinned.

“I’m not.” Yu Han had been happy that he’d discovered a gimmick with Deep Sleep and Calm Before the Storm Breathing Technique, but the joy felt less colourful now.

They’d be receiving the second Pure Qi Assimilating Elixir tonight. He’d wipe that smug look off Li Yao’s face in no time.

Ignore it. You lose if you react.

“You were injured quite badly yesterday,” Yu Han said to Fang Zhao. The teen was still injured, but nowhere near as grievously as yesterday. “Did you take an elixir or something?”

“It’s my Bloodline Art.”

“Cyclic Lifeblood Conversion? I thought it only helped you convert blood into True Qi?”

“And also Lifeforce. Lifeforce is a type of Qi too, after all,” Fang Zhao said. His eyes looked redder as his fingers twitched, a nail scratching the golden ring as if to harm it.

“Would it work even though you’re Level 0? I only unlocked Lifeforce at Level 1,” Yu Han said.

“All beings have Lifeforce, just as they have Qi. At the Body Tempering Realm, one can merely use it more consciously.”

That makes sense. I had Qi Depletion because of Echoing Dreamscape, even though a relevant bar doesn’t appear in my status.

“This Deep Sea’s Vitality Spite, too,” Fang Zhao said. “Although I can’t actively convert it like blood, I’m sensitive to things that affect Lifeforce. This is a fantastic brew, Sister Huang. Perhaps at the Profound Grade, if I may guess.”

Yu Han tried his best not to look shocked. If he ever went back to the White Lotus Kingdom, he would have to find out how his ancestors got their hands on this thing.

And my clam necklace, that bastard took it! He’d go back and find the hooded man who killed his family. Johan never left a score unsettled.

“What’s with the crab?” Li Yao asked. “That’s a Spirit Beast, right? Are you planning on taming it?”

“Brother Li, we don’t do taming in the Stormy Reef Sect,” Fang Zhao said. “The Heavenly Friendship Palace Master would have a word to say if you even attempted it.”

“How do you know?”

“I thought of contracting a Spirit Beast to act as my aid in the Hidden Realm. With my resources, though…” He slumped his shoulders. “This token is the last of my funds. If it was another sect, I could probably trade a good Spirit Beast for a thousand mortal-grade spirit stones. But here, it needs to be willing from both sides.”

“Makes sense in hindsight,” Li Yao said. “That Elder Chang treated the worm like it was a person.”

“It is,” Huang Niuniu said.

“I guess it is.” Li Yao shrugged. “So, tubs, are you planning on contracting it?”

“No idea. Wen Liujie said it had contracted many disciples before, but none lasted. It’s a famous Spirit around here.”

“Whoa. Lucky, then? Why’d the contracts fail?”

Yu Han explained the situation without delving too deep into his abilities. He hadn’t even shared the full details with Huang Niuniu either, like how his Echoing Dreamscape and Deep Sleep worked. She only knew that his dreams were more lucid, and he could remember them better.

After giving a cursory overview of the crabscape, blue pearls, and the pond, leaving out how the pearls gave him points in Memory, Yu Han asked for their opinions.

“Dunno.” Li Yao scratched his ears. “I’ll ask around if I find anything.”

Fang Zhao spoke up. “I’ve heard about similar incidents before.”

“Of crabs losing memory?” Yu Han asked.

“Of Spirit Beasts leaving esoteric objects to others,” Fang Zhao said. “Not exactly of crabs, though. Non-Thinker Crab. Do you know if that is its species’ name, or a title specifically for that crab?”

“Title? Oh, right. Like Worm Daoist Feral Spot, and the Gorge-Crawling Earthworms.” Yu Han shook his head. “No idea.”

“That makes it difficult to know if this is a trait of the species, or unique to this crab,” Fang Zhao said. “As for the pearls, it could be a trade, or a gift. Or it could just be losing them without knowing.”

“A trade?”

“There’s a bird that leaves jewelled feathers for seed. A white-eyed carp that may leave a scale for wine. Usually, the Spirit Beasts take something in return.”

Yu Han shuddered. Was the crab taking something from him?

“It’s never theft, though. It would be a Demonic Beast in such a case. For Spirit Beasts and Gods, you would have to know about and agree to the exchange. They rarely gift with nothing in return, and only do so if you’ve helped them out selflessly. Unless, of course, it’s losing the pearls.”

Yu Han let out a relieved sigh.

“I don’t think it’s losing them without being aware,” Huang Niuniu said. “It always sees the pearls popping up in the dream, doesn’t it? It could just take them back.” She glared at Yu Han. “You aren’t tricking it somehow, are you?”

“Wouldn’t dare,” Yu Han said defensively. He had thought about doing it, but still hadn’t. Maybe in the future? The crab did trick Yu Han into the crabscape. Tit for tat?

“If it isn’t losing it, then it really could be a gift. But why would it gift so many pearls willy-nilly? It’s not like it can gift without a cost, either.”

“Maybe as thanks after it asks what the parchment is?” Huang Niuniu said. “And the memory is the cost?”

“I don’t agree,” Fang Zhao replied. “If it was a gift, the cost would be the creation of it. The memory loss comes afterwards, right? If it was a gift, it would lose ownership of the pearls. In which case, the pearls would not turn blue with its memories. A gift, once given, severs the karmic bond. But the memories somehow flow to the pearls still, so it’s not a gift. I’ve never heard of a gift that disadvantages the gift-giver so much either. The heavens can’t be that fickle.”

“You’re quite knowledgeable,” Yu Han said. “What the hell is a karmic bond?”

“I might not look like it, but remember, I’m from a great clan. As for the karmic bond, it’s a mysterious thing. I can’t explain it properly myself.”

Yu Han didn’t press. “The crab is clearly losing its memory. So this karmic bond or whatever isn’t severed.”

“If the karmic bond is still there, it’s not a gift. That’s what I heard from my clan elders in the past. And if it’s not a gift, then the crab still owns the pearls. It has power over it. And this… continued ownership is somehow disadvantageous to it?” Fang Zhao said. “It might think it’s a trade, but it isn’t. Maybe it just doesn’t know better because it forgets? Even if the trade or gift is fair in the moment, the crab later loses memory of it, thus somehow reconnecting the karmic bond? Could the whole pearl-giving then turn into an unfair trade for the crab as a penalty?”

I got a point in Memory. It loses Memory. That’s definitely unfair.

“You could tell it not to give the pearls away, gift or not,” Huang Niuniu said.

“It would just forget, no?” Fang Zhao replied.

“It remembers how to play fetch,” Huang Niuniu countered. “Just tell it firmly, and then return all the subsequent blue pearls to its own dreamscape. It will remember.”

Yu Han had shared his hypothesis that the blue pearls kept the crab’s memories. That if they returned the blue pearls to the crabscape, or perhaps the pond within it, then the crab would keep its memories.

“There’s another problem with that, though,” Fang Zhao said. “Brother Yu should know what I’m talking about.”

“Third parties,” Yu Han said.