The Royal Military Academy's Impostor Owns a Dungeon [BL]

Tears.

There were tears everywhere.

Right in front of the Dungeon Guardians booth, a certain golden-eyed cadet stood frozen, completely unprepared for customers who looked like they were actively dying from extreme envy and emotional devastation.

Some people cried tears of joy.

They laughed and sobbed at the same time as they stumbled into the greenhouse tunnel with jelly legs, clutching their chests as if they had narrowly survived something life changing.

But somehow, the lamenting tears outside only increased.

Because once the question was asked, it spread like a virus.

”Is it true?”

”Is there really crop picking?”

”Would they really be allowed to pick for themselves?”

Surely that couldn’t be real.

Well.

Of course it was.

Luca nodded patiently and began to explain, his calm voice doing absolutely nothing to soothe the growing crowd.

He clarified that the complimentary crop or herb bundle was not just a freebie. It was part of the experience. Customers would be taught how to harvest crops the proper way.

The little chipmunk didn’t really explain why to the crowd but their guild thought it was critical knowledge that had to be passed around if the goal was to encourage everyone to farm in the long run.

So why not start it as early as now when there would be a legitimate excuse to bring people from different walks of life together?

”They get to pick what they want to harvest,” Luca said gently, ”and they can either eat them right away or take them home.”

”!!!”

The words caught them off-guard, even if deep inside they already expected something big.

People clutched each other.

Someone let out a sound that might have been a whimper.

Off to the side, a certain blonde brother stared at the scene in silence.

Ollie wondered where his good brother had learned torture like this. And more importantly, who had taught him to execute it so effectively.

At this rate, the mop was seriously considering the need to establish a satellite medical bay station right next to their booth.

Because it was obvious to him that people weren’t taking the devastation well.

At all.

The situation only worsened when the stream camera caught Jax calmly handing out small baskets.

That was when things truly spiraled.

The children were the worst affected.

Or perhaps the most blessed.

They bounced in place, barely containing themselves. Those already inside the greenhouse looked moments away from launching themselves forward purely out of excitement.

Because who wouldn’t be?

Jax smiled brightly and finally announced what everyone had been waiting for.

”The highlight of the tour,” he said cheerfully.

”Harvesting.”

The screaming began shortly after.

__

Jax clapped his hands once, instantly drawing everyone’s attention.

”Okay,” he said brightly, eyes practically sparkling, ”before we start harvesting, there are some very important rules you need to know.”

Every child straightened.

Several adults leaned forward.

Somewhere in the crowd, a soldier subconsciously assumed parade rest.

”When specific crops are well cared for,” Jax continued, ”they will eventually produce fruit or grow into something edible. But like anything else, there is a best time to harvest them as well as the best way to do it.”

He held up a finger.

”If you harvest too early, it might still be okay for some of the crops. Some of them can ripen even after they are picked.”

A few kids nodded as if committing this to memory forever.

”But most of the time, it would be better to harvest when it’s just right.”

He raised another finger.

”In most cases, too late is also bad. Crops that stay too long can lose flavor, texture, or even start to spoil.”

His tone grew earnest.

”This is very important. Harvesting is not just about taking. It is about timing and doing it right so the children aren’t harmed and they could produce more fruit for the next harvest.”

The human kids stared at him in awe.

The adults felt mildly judged.

Then, just as the tension peaked, Jax smiled again.

”Now,” he said cheerfully, ”today, you get to choose what you want to harvest.”

That did it.

A quiet wave of excitement rippled through the group.

”For those picking the small red fruits,” Jax said, gesturing toward one section, ”you can pick enough to fill the basket you were given.”

Several kids hugged their baskets protectively.

”For those choosing leafy greens, you can select one mature head of your choice.”

He paused.

Then his grin turned mischievous.

”But for the baby potatoes, we thought it would be fun to add a little twist.”

The children leaned forward.

”Since you can’t really see root crops being harvested like this,” he explained, ”you’ll be allowed to pick one plant.”

A collective inhale swept through the group.

”You will then take all the mature potatoes attached to that plant, even if there are more than what your basket can hold.”

Gasps erupted.

”But,” he added, raising a finger, ”if the plant you pick has fewer mature ones, then that is part of the risk.”

The children stared and followed Jax’s gaze and suddenly felt like it was a game.

It was thrilling.

It was terrifying.

It was perfect.

__

Jax moved along the rows, excitement pouring out of him as he began describing the crops.

”These leafy greens,” he said enthusiastically, ”are great for salads. You can mix them with other things, cook them, or even eat them on their own.”

He pointed to another row.

”And these darker leaves can be turned into chips.”

”Chips?” a child repeated faintly.

”Yes,” Jax said proudly. ”Crunchy ones.”

Several kids looked like they were seconds away from lunging at everything.

”And these small red fruits are sweet. You can eat them as they are, make drinks, or turn them into desserts.”

He tilted his head thoughtfully.

”Like one of the flavors for our mini doughnuts.”

He could’ve just launched a missile with that.

Eyes widened.

Mouths fell open.

Hands tightened around baskets because the memory was just too recent to ignore, especially for the fresh-faced kids who thought they just ate a piece of heaven.

Then Jax suddenly snapped his fingers.

”Oh,” he said. ”Right. The baby potatoes.”

Everyone froze.

”As you might have guessed,” Jax said casually, ”they are the main ingredient for the cheesy garlic potato balls our guild is giving out today.”

The gasp was loud enough to echo.

Sam blinked.

Marco turned slowly.

Several soldiers who received the invites and inevitably skipped the line exchanged looks of pure confusion until someone whispered that it was the freebie for the day.

Something unforgettable.

Reeve felt that deep in his soul.

He had been brought to his knees by those potato balls.

And then Jax mentioned something that nearly ended him.

”As the jackpot prize winner,” the redhead said kindly, looking at Reeve, ”you could actually learn the recipe and recreate it at home.”

The intern felt his toes curl.

”If you pick the baby potatoes here, then buy the herbs, spices, cooking oil, garlic, and cheese from the minimart using your allocation, you should be able to make it yourself.”

He smiled.

”You could even buy the ingredients for the dip.”

Reeve felt unsteady.

”But Lord Taylor,” he asked weakly, ”how could I possibly learn to prepare something so special?”

”Oh,” Jax said easily, grinning wide. ”You have access to the activity center, right?”

Reeve nodded numbly.

”Then you can definitely learn it if you take the cooking lessons.”

The words hit the greenhouse.

But more than just that enclosed space, the words actually echoed out of it.

They spread across the Empire like a curse.

Cooking lessons.