The Overlord of Puluo

The Gramophone raised the longsword. ”You wretched bitch. Do you really think I will not cut you down?”

Hong Ying extended her spearhead toward the Gramophone. ”Then do it. Make it quick.”

The Gramophone was enraged. ”You feel no remorse at all?”

Hong Ying laughed. ”I have nothing to regret. Even if I had to choose again, I would still kill you.”

”You wretched bitch!” The Gramophone smashed the sword hilt into her, sending her staggering.

Hong Ying regained her balance and spoke slowly. ”I am no wretched bitch. The most wretched thing I ever did in this life was trust you. From the day we met, I listened to you in everything. Even when I was thrown onto death row and passed through the gates of hell, I still went back to the battlefield and listened to you.

”Then you commanded the entire army to march to Wildgoose Sandplain. That was when I knew I could no longer obey you. The seller of sundries and that lunatic craftsman were both there. You were leading us straight to our deaths.”

”I told you I could win the battle!”

Hong Ying laughed out loud. ”So what if you won? Cong Shixiang had an imperial edict in his hands, with the orders written plainly in black and white. If you lost, he would make every one of us die on the battlefield. If you won, he would read out the edict at once, drag the two of us back to the capital, throw us onto death row, and leave us there waiting for the executioner’s blade!”

”Who told you that?”

”It was Prince Chun who delivered the news to me. He told me he saw the edict with his own eyes. No matter what, we were bound to be dead. Do you understand now? If you had asked me to die for you, I would not have blinked. But die for them? I could not do it. I am not that wretched.

”Zhao Xiaowan, I am no wretched bitch. The real wretched bitch is you! You walked out of death row and still learned nothing. I fought with everything I had to try and convince you, but you would not turn back. A wretch like you deserved to be killed!”

The Gramophone’s anger eased a little. ”What were you planning to do back then? Did you think that you wouldn’t have to die after you killed me?”

Hong Ying dipped her spearhead in a nod. ”Yes. Once I had killed you, I meant to go straight to the seller of sundries and surrender. I would not have to die, and the soldiers would not have to throw their lives away. Unfortunately, you were so damned hard to kill. I paid with my own life to bring you down, and even then, I could not save them.”

The Gramophone let out a scornful laugh. ”And you call yourself clever? I came from the opera stage. For someone like me, death would have settled everything. You could have killed me and surrendered, but your whole family, young and old, were still in the capital. What did you plan to do about them?”

”Do you have any idea how desperate things had become by then? You think I could still spare a thought for them?”

The Gramophone asked again, ”Fine. You did not care about your own family. What about the families of all those soldiers?”

Hong Ying answered, ”I couldn’t be bothered with them anymore. That was the extent of my capability.”

”You had no ability to carry it through, yet a wretch like you still insisted on making such grand plans!” The Gramophone shouted. She swung the longsword and drove the hilt into Hong Ying, causing her to stagger again.

She continued shouting, ”I commanded the troops to march toward Wildgoose Sandplain because I had already gotten news that the Peddler would lead his troops through Iron Wasteland Valley. As long as we reached the Wildgoose Sandplain, we would never have encountered the enemy!”

Hong Ying froze. ”That is impossible. The Peddler had already decided to fight you at Wildgoose Sandplain. That was the intelligence our spy sent back.”

The Gramophone replied, ”That was fake news that the Peddler sent out. His target was the capital. He had no intention of wasting his strength fighting us at Wildgoost Plain. It would be a treacherous journey to travel from Iron Wasteland Valley, but it was a shortcut. The Peddler had long planned to take that route, but he was just worried that we might intercept him in the valley. And so, he sent out fake news and your spy fell for it. I knew it was fake news because I had my own eyes and ears planted among his men. By the time you killed me, he had already set out for Iron Wasteland Valley.

”If you had not killed me, I would have led all of you to Wildgoose Sandplain, where we would have found no enemy waiting for us. That would have been considered an error in my command, so I could have kept the army stationed there. No matter how many imperial edicts came down, I would have had an excuse to hold the troops in place. If Cong Shixiang had dared to make a move against me, I would have killed him on the spot.”

Hong Ying stared at her in shock. ”You knew Cong Shixiang was planning to move against you?”

The Gramophone sneered. ”Did you think I could not tell what kind of vermin he was? Did you think I did not know that he was the one egging Yao Xin on? I had really hoped that once we reached Wildgoose Sandplain, our part in the war would be as good as over. The Peddler would pass through Iron Wasteland Valley and strike directly at the capital. Whether he won would depend on his own ability. If he succeeded, it would not have been too late for all of you to surrender then. If he failed, the blame would have fallen entirely on me. When the imperial court came looking for someone to blame, I could simply have fled for my life. At the very least, that would have kept the rest of you safe. Yet you wretched bitch, you conspired with the other officers and struck at me first. You failed to save even your own life, then handed the entire army over to Cong Shixiang. You are to blame for this entire debt of blood. Tell me, does that not make you a wretched bitch?”

Hong Ying fell silent for a long while. She shook her head again and again, muttering, ”You are lying to me. You never told me any of this before.”

”Cong Shixiang had eyes and ears throughout the entire army, from the highest ranked officers to the lowest ranked soldiers. Every move you made was under his watch. How could I possibly have told you? If word had leaked out beforehand, do you think the plan could still have succeeded?”

Hong Ying’s voice trembled. ”I... I don’t believe you...”

The Gramophone flew into a rage. ”It does not matter whether you believe me! You have spent all these years deaf and blind to everything around you. There are still plenty of people who lived through it. Go and ask them which route the Peddler ultimately took.”

Hong Ying began trembling all over. ”I... I cannot go outside. I cannot ask anyone...”

”You do not need to leave. Ask our house which route the Peddler took back then.”

Silence settled over the Pocket Dwelling.

They waited for a long time until this old-sounding voice rang out. ”I remember this. He went through Iron Wasteland Valley.

Hong Ying collapsed to the floor with a thud. She wanted to get up, but it didn’t work. Every joint in her spearbody was trembling.

She extended her spearhead toward the Gramophone. ”Kill me. Take pity on me and kill me.”

The Gramophone snorted coldly. ”You think cutting off a spearhead counts as killing you?”

Hong Ying reached blindly for the Gramophone. ”You can devour souls, can’t you? Then devour mine. Consume me. Do it now.”

The Gramophone laughed coldly. ”You cannot bear to go on living, so you think you should be allowed to die? You think I will let you off that easily? Hold out your hand.”

Hong Ying did not know what the Gramophone intended, but she held out her hand anyway. In the end, it would only mean true death. She no longer cared how she was erased from existence.

The Gramophone pierced Hong Ying’s palm with her needle, drew a little blood, and dripped it onto one of the seeds Li Banfeng had just brought back.

***

In the middle of the desert, Li Banfeng grinned at a lizard covered in wounds. ”Ready to work for me now?”

The lizard spent a long time gasping for breath before answering. ”Hero, at least tell me what you want me to do first. Please stop beating me.”

Li Banfeng pulled out a contract. ”Do you know the person named here?”

”I do. That is Old Able-Dangler. He’s a monkey. I know where he lives. I will take you to him.”

The lizard led Li Banfeng to a pond. An old white-haired monkey lived beside the water

Li Banfeng approached him. ”You are Old Able-Dangler, right? Do you recognize this?”

He waved the contract in front of the old monkey. It was the contract Old Able-Dangler had signed with the land deity, so there was no chance he would fail to recognize it.

”How did that end up in your hands?”

”Bei Wushuang sold you to Meng Yuchun. You will have to move somewhere else now.”

Old Able-Dangler nodded. ”All right.”

That was it? He agreed just like that? He’s not even going to resist? Li Banfeng was taken aback and said, ”You did understand what I said, did you not? The land deity sold you. You will have to sign a new contract and serve a different master.”

”Where is the new contract? I will put my thumbprint on it right now.” Old Able-Dangler raised a hand, ready to cut open his palm.

Why is this going so smoothly? Li Banfeng thought. He had expected a fight.

He took out a contract he had written himself and handed it over. The contract did not even have the land deity’s name, so he expected the old monkey to ask at least a few questions. However, Old Able-Dangler said nothing and pressed his bloody thumbprint onto it at once.

Li Banfeng took out another contract left behind by Bei Wushuang. ”Do you know this person?”

Old Able-Dangler nodded. ”I do. I will take you to him.”

”Will he agree to serve a new master?”

”Probably? I will help you persuade him.”

”Is he a good fighter? If he refuses, I might have to fight him.”

”He is not much of a fighter. I will help you beat him.”

This old monkey is being a bit too helpful... Does he have some other intentions?

Old Able-Dangler had no other intentions. With his help, Li Banfeng brought more than thirty aberrant creatures over to his own territory, one after another.

He could not bring too many over at once. Otherwise, it would be difficult to explain why Bei Wushuang had supposedly sold every aberrant creature under his command.

Fortunately, clever people did not need everything spelled out for them, and Old Able-Dangler was clever. After observing him for a day, Li Banfeng found that the old monkey was not only pragmatic but also highly capable.

Li Banfeng took out two Mystic Blazing Pills and handed them to him. ”I still have quite a few contracts here. Bei Wushuang sold all these contracts to Miss Meng. I don’t feel like doing this errand anymore, so I am leaving it to you. Can you manage it?”

”Rest assured. Leave everything to me.”

”Do a good job, and you will earn more rewards!” Li Banfeng handed him a hundred deed contracts, intending to see how efficiently this old monkey could complete the task.

Old Able-Dangler took the contracts and followed Li Banfeng’s instructions. Each day, he sent twenty to thirty aberrant creatures from Bei Wushuang’s territory over to Li Banfeng’s territory.

With the matter properly settled, Li Banfeng prepared to go back to Qiu Luoye’s territory and begin building the train station.

He first went back home to tell his wifey about his plans so that she could prepare everything they would need. His wifey held out a seed. ”Husband dear, plant this first. There is no need to rush off. Wait until it bears fruit.”

Hong Ying was sitting before the mirror, combing her hair. When she heard the Gramophone, her comb slipped from her hand and fell to the floor.

Li Banfeng examined the seed. ”Wifey, what is so special about this?”

The Gramophone laughed. ”You will find out once it grows. It will grow into someone useful.”

Li Banfeng raised his eyebrows, picked up a trowel, and went outside to plant it.

Hong Ying turned toward the Gramophone. ”Xiaowan, are you trying to...”

The Gramophone snorted coldly. ”I am only testing the seed. Don’t overthink this.”

***

Li Banfeng planted the seed, poured several potions over it, and gave it a good watering. Before long, a little green shoot poked its head through the soil. Then came the branches, followed by the leaves.

It grew much more slowly than the cabbage had. Zhang Wanlong had hidden the seed inside a hard outer shell, making it look like a small black bean. Li Banfeng had no idea what sort of fruit might come out of such a thing.

Two whole hours passed before the fruit finally ripened. It was a muskmelon, pale white with the faintest touch of green. And what a smell it had!

The sweet fragrance curled through the air and made Li Banfeng want to rush over and take a great big bite. The muskmelon grew whiter and whiter until, at last, it ripened and burst open. Out stepped a woman dressed all in white.

The Tang Saber slid partway from its sheath and peered at her from Li Banfeng’s waist. The Film Projector popped out from his chest and adjusted its focus.

The Glove wriggled out of Li Banfeng’s pocket, all five fingers waggling at once. ”Boss, she is absolutely gorgeous.”

Author’s Note:

PS: Although Hong Ying isn’t as beautiful as the Gramophone, she is a top-tier beauty.