Chaos Devourer System: My Classless Ascension

Chapter 465: Chapter 463:Long Chen...

”I’m telling you, Dante, I don’t know how, but I’m sure you’ve got a way to do it.” Malachi’s strained and exhausted voice barely reached my ears as I myself was too busy trying to compose myself.

We had done the only thing we felt possible at the last moment, and that was to take this little man out and try to tire him out.

Only to find out that trying to tire out a toddler with an agenda was a far more stressful activity than facing an Apostle of Fear.

Luckily, the little guy had finally run out of juice and was now sleeping peacefully within Nyssara’s arms.

”Haaa... I’m not doing it, Malachi. What if something goes wrong?” I shook my head exhaustedly as I looked at the sleeping kid in echoing dread.

”It’s the only way. That kid might still remember shit when he wakes up, and we don’t want that happening, now do we?”

The monkey was adamant.

For the last 30 minutes, we had been trying to figure out how we were going to ensure the little man forgot all those words, and Malachi had suggested wiping them from his mind.

I had been against it, but now, it was looking like the only way out.

”Don’t tell me you bastards are actually considering erasing a child’s memory?” Sana’s dumbfoundment was plain to hear.

”It’s the only choice. For the greater good.”

”Greater good, my ass. I dare you guys. Touch that kid and watch me wake the girls up prematurely.”

”You wouldn’t dare.”

I wasn’t even done speaking when a flash of green light bathed the whole room and Terra appeared, disappointment painted on her face.

She took the sleeping kid from Nyssara, turned toward me, ”Humph! I’m disappointed in you, husband.” Then left like nothing happened.

”Haaa... now look what you bastards caused. My women are upset with me.”

”Oh, them being upset is the least of our problems, I’ll tell you that.” Salazar had collapsed like a dead fish long before we even entered the room, and his first words up weren’t even anything good.

”Just... forget it. The kid might not even remember, not after all that excitement and sugar going down his system.” I tried to remain optimistic.

”Alright! No more sad topics. Let’s get down to business.” I slapped my cheeks as I composed myself.

”You aren’t really serious about this integration and infiltration nonsense, right?” Malachi grumbled.

”You bet your monkey ass I am. Now stop complaining and sit up,” I ordered swiftly.

During our time out, we had also tried to understand what was happening, and indeed, it was as I’d heard.

There was a grand trial being held for some prestigious and grand sect—what sect that was, I really had no idea.

All I knew was that the sect was powerful and had its true roots in the Martial Spirit World itself, which was our target in the first place, so why not use it as the perfect excuse?

”Alright, you bastards. Here’s how we’re going to go about this,” a strange sense of excitement began swelling up from within me as the thought of what I was about to do settled within me.

I was actually about to have my own young master cultivation segment.

”First of all, you guys are going to need name changes.”

”Name changes?” Paku.

”Why would we want to change our names?” Salazar.

”Because names like Paku and Salazar are weird-sounding in a world such as this one.”

”And how would you know something like that, Dante?” Leo asked skeptically.

”I’ve done plenty of research on things like this.”

”Bullshit! You hate studying just as much as the rest of us,” Malachi countered.

”Not all research requires studying shit, you bastard! Now shut up and receive your new names.”

”For someone who was complaining just a while ago about the cringe, you’re strangely becoming quite invested, aren’t you?” Shaia.

”The bastard gets to live out some boyish childhood, it isn’t strange. Men are weird creatures,” Sana.

”I think husband is cute when he’s like this and not trying to mess with a child’s head,” Terra added from the side.

She was never letting what happened earlier go, was she?

I shook my head, tuning out the women as I focused on the group before me.

”Alright then, for your new names...”

”Bitch! You aren’t changing my fucking name!” Malachi.

”The monkey will be going by Yang Kai. It has Kai in it already, so you’re good.”

”Bastard!! Don’t you dare ignore me!!”

That’s exactly what I did as I turned toward Leo.

”As for you, I don’t know, I’ll just call you Huang Xiaolong. You don’t have any draconic traits, but it’ll do.”

”So, how exactly do you even know these names?” The chicken-cat asked.

”Once again, research.” I waved away his question, turning toward the tiny furball. ”As for Paku, I’ll just call you Duan Ling Tian. It should do nicely.”

”Duan... Duan Li... Li.. motherfucker! I can’t even say that shit out loud!!”

Once again, ignored.

”And Salazar, you look like a ’Chu’... I’ll just call you Chu Feng then. No need for calling anyone that generic ’Lin’ nonsense to avoid unnecessary attraction.” I nodded, satisfied with my successful name assignments.

”Dante, you bastard—”

”No. No. I’m not Dante. Not while we’re here. For as long as we’re here, you can call me....”

....

....

”Long Chen... the name is Long Chen,” I replied to the white-robed man taking names for the trials about to commence in a few days.

We had finally arrived at where we were to register our names, ranks, and have our martial spirits—if we had any—tested.

”Long Chen... alright.”

”Martial spirit type?” The man asked.

”I don’t have one.” I hadn’t bothered making one, not like it was needed. After all, despite being a cultivation-type world, they were still an intergalactic civilization, so surely there were those not martial spirit-focused.

The look on the man’s face changed as contempt painted his entire expression.

”Oh, so you’re an outsider. You can move along.” The switch was so abrupt I was taken aback for a few seconds before I shrugged it off and moved ahead, Malachi trailing right behind me.

”Name...”

...

...

”Name?”

The monkey was still sulking about the name change, unwilling to use his new one, but one threatening look from my side and,

”Yang... Yang Kai..” The bastard was forced to speak up.

”Martial spirit?”

”I don’t have any...”

”Oh... move along then.” The man dismissed him with the same enthusiasm he had when he addressed me.

”Dante... I swear on all that’s hairy, I will get you back for this one day,” the monkey growled the moment he got close to me.

”I’m not Dante. I’m Young Master Long Chen, 2nd Young Master of the Grand Long Manor from the East.”

”Bitch! What the hell are you even talking about?”

”Quiet. You’re attracting attention. Duan Ling Tian (Paku) is up next.” I shut the monkey up, attention locked onto the now 7-foot upright Paku.

Admittedly, it would’ve been counterproductive if the furball had tried registering with his usual look.

”Name...” the man asked.

”Duan Liui... Duan Lihk... Duan lo.. fuck!!” Poor guy really was having a hard time pronouncing such a simple name.

”Absolute! You bastard!! How the fuck do you pronounce this fucking name!?” The furball raged.

”It’s Duan Ling Tian, you fucking shithead! Better stay in character. Don’t you dare ruin this for me!!”

”FUCK!!!”

”Uhh... sir... name?”

”Bitch!! Didn’t you hear what he just said? That’s my fucking name!”

”Umm... sir, I’ll need you to say it again, since I didn’t catch it the first time.”

”Motherfucker!!!” Paku roared.

”Sir... please calm down. I don’t want to have to use force...” The man tried to be diplomatic, but—

”Force? FORCE!? Bitch!!! Don’t you fucking test me!! I’m already stressed out as is. So don’t fucking push me!!”

”Sir.. I think you should take your—”

ROOOOOARRRRRRRRRRR!!!!!! The 7-foot frame of Paku exploded out in a raging crimson aura as the furball finally lost his shit.

”Take a leave, your bitch ass...”

BOOOOOOOMMMMMMMMMMMM!!!!!

His figure ballooned in size, becoming a towering figure whose size was so massive he was overlooking the entirety of Canglan.

”You bitches wanna play? Then try this on for size.” Paku’s frame had grown so massive it could be viewed even from the distance of space, the world of Canglan having already become nothing but a marble in his gaze.

”HEAVENLY CATASTROPHIC REDDISH BEAMING LASER DOWN YOUR FUCKING THROATS!!!” His horns touched together as a devastating crimson gathered at the touching points, and then—

WENG!!!

He let it go.

The beam blasted through not just the world of Canglan, but the myriad worlds around and behind it.

Wherever it passed, nothing but an empty void of space remained as half a galaxy was wiped out in an instant.

”Haaa.... Refreshing!!!” The massive kaiju sighed in satisfaction as he watched the aftermath of his actions.

”Satisfied?” I appeared before the massive eyeball of the furball, arms folded.

”Very. Ahahahahaha!!! Let’s see them try to annoy me now.”

”Alright. I’m glad you finally got that out of your system, so how about we try this again? And this time, don’t go erasing half a galaxy out of frustration. It’s not their fault our lives are being held hostage by a toddler.” I shook my head, clearly aware of what was frustrating the furball.

So, ignoring the multiple powerful auras that had exploded out of the surrounding regions of space, appearing before the gigantic creature floating in space like he owned it, I raised my hand, and then—

SNAP!

The world glitched once, and then—

”Name?” We were right back where we had left off, with the white-robed man asking Paku for his name.

”Duan Ling Tian.” My voice drifted into the mind of the clueless furball as he answered as calmly as expected from the manifestation of Wrath.

”Alright then, you can go ahead.” The man let him pass without asking anything else, something that didn’t sit quite right with—

”Oi!! Bastard! Why didn’t you ask him for a martial spirit?” Malachi raged from the side.

”Ehh? But he’s clearly a beast; I don’t expect him to have one,” the man replied, confused.

”But I’m a fucking monkey and you still asked me for one!!”

”You are? I thought you were just a really hairy, handsome human.”

The moment Malachi heard ”handsome,” he folded.

”Oh. Oh... hahaha.. then I guess it’s no issue.” The monkey laughed, blushing.

”Oii!! Oii!! Oii!! What the fuck is that supposed to mean?” Paku, already cleared, stopped in fury at the conversation. ”What do you mean you thought he was a handsome hairy man? What about me?”

”Eyy? This... I’m.. I’m sure sir is quite attractive to other beast women.”

”Ahh... fuck.” I had barely finished shaking my head when—

”MOTHERFUCKER!!!!”

ROOOOOOOAARRRRRRRRRRR!!!!

The furball exploded out in rage, his body ballooning to that massive size once more.

”DARE TO CALL ME UGLY!!? I’LL SHOW YOUR BITCH ASS WHAT UGLY LOOKS LIKE...”

”BASTARDLY DISINTEGRATING FOOLISHNESS BEAM RIGHT DOWN YOUR FUCKING ASS, YOU BITCH!!!”

The red light from his horns washed over the entire region of space as this time, an entire fucking galaxy from the High Planar Galaxies was wiped out from existence.

I could only sigh and shake my head as, once again, this promised to be a very stressful day.

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A/N: Uhhh? Paku... huh!?

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Thanks for reading...