Diary of a Teenaged Mimic

Dear Diary,

Some days you’re just doing your thing, rocking your enemies’ collective shit, collecting happy wife tokens to exchange for carnal bliss, harvesting useful, interesting, or amusing Mortals, and then all of a sudden life shits on you, sideways.

Sorry, I’m having a very Mor day today. Fucks with my head just an apocalyptic bit.

Anyway, yesterday after I confirmed the timing with Big Jarl Johnson, not to mention that yes, I would be fighting a Mage Duel in order to secure my spot in a two-band Battle of the Bands, I shook the Jarl’s hand, which was a weird experience in and of itself, what with his fingertips being roughly the size of mine, but the joints nearest his hands being the size of chubs of bologna. Left his whole hands looking like one of those industrial robot arms or some shit.

The man had some grace and graciousness though. After shaking my hand he gently nudged it around atop his, popped off a Loki-worthy fancy bow, then brought lips the size of baguettes down to brush my knuckles. ”Until tomorrow then, m’lady.”

”Normally I’d take somebody’s fingers off for doing shit like that,” he winced, but before he could open his mouth to apologize, I continued. ”But I think you get a pass. Just to be clear, way too big, hard pass, thanks for the offer. But you’ve got style, Johnson. I’m glad I’m not gonna play ’who can bleed on the floor longer’ with you tomorrow.”

”M’lady is too kind.”

”Nah. I’m an absolute bitch. You’re just a decent guy with some edgy fashion sense.” I paused. ”Wait, you don’t like guys, do you?”

He pulled back looking sorta horrified. ”No!”

I shrugged. He was either serious and honest, or eating Turkish Delight, and it really wasn’t my business to get into which. ”No offense intended. Just, y’know, if you wind up my lackey tomorrow, that’s just another reason I need to keep an eye out for folks who’d go gaga over being serenaded by Your Pneumatic Romance. See you tomorrow!”

With that I stepped back home to what passed for domestic tranquility. In this case Menace trying to get to her glider by hopping off of her bed, with Saffron sitting at her desk double facepalming and Marie playing goalie, blocking Isnomi mid-leap so she fell back onto her bed growling. ”OI! The fuck’s going on, Mini-Bitch!”

”FAI! WANNA FAI!”

”The fuck? It’s dark o clock.”

”Yeth.” She folded her arms and glared at me like I was being deliberately stupid. ”Wanna fai ad nide to thee gamma.”

Something struck me just then, and I put on my best Mom voice and said, ”Menace, open your mouth.”

She gave me a booger look, then threw open her maw the way kids do when they’re trying for ’I’mma disgust you by showing you my uvula’. Unfortunately for her, I’d upgraded my game to ’tonsils’ back in Camden. Unfortunately for me, the inside of my daughter’s mouth didn’t look so much like ’cranky toddler’ as ’Xenomorph, Lamprey, and Megalodon made a scary-mouthed baby’. ”AHHHHH!”

”Okay, Menace. You can shut it now.” At least now I knew why her speech impediment seemed to come and go with her moods. I was not thrilled that her mouth looked like a less pleasant alternative to an industrial recycling shredder, but fuck it, she was weaned, and if I could somehow snap a polaroid that in and of itself would put paid to any future suitors trying to force something into her mouth. Okay, any that did so after seeing what I just saw deserve exactly what they got. Or lost, really, which would probably include the vast majority of their pelvic region. Like nips to knees. Really glad she was weaned at this point.

I shook my head as her jaw levered itself back into cutie mode. ”It’s nighttime, Menace. Grandma would have enough trouble on the roof during the...” Something in her face changed, but as she opened her mouth, I held up one hand to let my train of thought slide to a stop, pick it up, and put it back on the rails. ”Grandma.”

”Yeth.”

I facepalmed. ”Menace, you may not fly at night until your brother has equipped your glider with lights. Powerful ones.” Saffron de-face-palmed, looking thoughtful. She hadn’t figured it out, which amazed me until I realized that this might be one of those occasions where more than one Blend might be working against her. I wasn’t about to tell her here and now in front of everybody, either. ”Really big powerful lights so no matter how high up you get or how far away you are, we can still see you.”

Isnomi looked annoyed, but said, ”ah-tay...”

”Also, your brother will be going over night flying with you as well. I don’t remember the details, but I know air moves different at night and shit. And for your first couple flights? You will stay close, just in case something goes wrong. Got it?”

Now that the argument wasn’t ’fly versus no fly’, but ’rules you have to obey to fly’, she got a lot less mulish. ”Ah-tay.” She hopped off her bed and headed toward the armoire.

”Not tonight, Menace. It’s bedtime now, and if your brother is still up that’s on him, because he’s an adult.” She started to visibly swell upward and I cut her off. ”None of that, Isnomi Aetos-Diaz. You still need your sleep to grow, you know.”

She re-folded her arms and plopped back onto her bed with a huff. ”How I fai ad nide if I seep ad nide?”

”You’ll take a nap in the afternoon the day before.” I turned to Saffron. ”Does all that make sense?”

She sighed, stood, and came over to snuggle under my arm. ”I’m a little too terrified to be certain, but you seem rational enough at the moment, and I trust you. I don’t see any points of contention that don’t boil down to,” she paused, then shrieked, ”MY BABY IS GOING TO GET LOST IN THE DARK!” Then she slumped against me. ”Sorry, everyone.”

Marie just chuckle purred and said, ”de nada.”

”Yeah, it’s okay, Kitten. But our little Menace is a precocious tyke. Chaining her down will only do to her what poor nutrition did to your height.” When she looked up at me with something cranky already leaking out of her mouth, I leaned down and silenced her. Angry kisses aren’t normally my thing, but even if she got more than the normal amount bitey, it was definitely one of the spicier lip only kisses she’d given me, and I’m including ones involving entirely different lips in that. Angry Kitten Kisses Good. When I pulled up for air I said, ”Don’t get me wrong, I love you fun sized, but my point, that tying her down will just keep her from growing up to be all she can be?”

She deflated. ”Yes. I know. You’re right.” This is still going on the Ledger. For doing so much Momming above and beyond when I can’t properly reward you if nothing else.

Fair. ”Wow. Kinda freaky hearing you say that to me. Gonna make my head swell. But,” I looked at Isnomi. ”There will be rules, because just like chaining you down will keep you from growing, so will you getting hurt, or even hurting someone else you care about. Understand?”

”Yeth.” She’d wound down to vaguely pouty and tired.

”For now? Get your little ass in bed and to sleep, scamp.” She grinned, flopped over sideways onto her bed, and started fake-snoring. We all had a little laugh at that, then helped each other get ready for bed, which tonight meant Marie’s floor bed. Because none of us were unaware of exactly how possible it would be for Menace to sneak into her brother’s room while we all slept in our bed.

Dommy Mommy had hit that place beyond pissed where abusive parents got all sweetness, calling for their kids to just come out, everything would be fine. I no longer mocked Mimic in any way for hiding under her own fat ass. I swear if this bitch had parents they’d be Ragyou Kiryuin and Isaac’s Mom.

Woke up to pressure on my chest. Opened my eyes to see Menace sitting atop me tailor fashion, staring at me. I sighed, rolled my joints to stretch them, then said, ”okay, you can go ask, but only after I’ve spoken with him, so he knows what I want him to add. Got it?” When she nodded, her squee so high pitched the wax in my ears melted, I added, ”also? I’d really appreciate it if you wait until a night when I don’t have a fight the day before or after. Mama wants to be there to see you, because I’m so proud of how fearless you are, my little Menace.”

She just grinned wider. I think she squeed louder, but I can’t be sure, because she climbed straight off my upper register. I set her on the bed and went to talk to Conrad.

I stuck my head into his workshop and called out, ”Son?”

He popped up from beside me, ”Yes, mother?”

”I need to have a quick talk with you. Do you mind if I shut the door behind us?”

He frowned. ”Of course not, mother. Have I displeased you?”

I smiled, shook my head, and pulled him into a hug as the door slid shut. ”No, son. Not at all. But I need something from you.”

”Name it.”

”It’s for your sister.”

He rolled his eyes. ”of course it is.” Then sighed. ”Fine. What does she need.”

I took a deep breath. ”I need you to arm her glider.” Before he could speak, I said, ”specifically, she wants to fly at night.”

He said, ”there are a variety of lights I could add for identification and navigation, but... weaponry?” He dropped his voice and muttered, ”I pity the owl that tries to eat her. Or Wyvern. Or Dragon.” Then he smiled. ”That might be entertaining to watch, really.”

I didn’t want to say anything plainly, because even in his Workshop, with my Blend up, I didn’t want her hearing. ”She does need lights. And there’s a reason I said she needs them to be weapons.”

It didn’t take him long. I’d put money on Saffron being smarter than him, but not by too fuckin’ much, and he had a multi-century head start. ”You’d have me craft a weapon to kill her?”

I shook my head the tiniest bit. ”Not that she doesn’t deserve it, but Menace is looking for Grandma. So no. Not kill her.” At that moment inspiration hit. Understanding. I realized just how right I was when Conrad winced like I’d just gut punched him over ninety percent of his body. I pulled him to me, murmuring like I’d do to Isnomi or Saffron when one of them was hurt or scared. ”It’s okay, son. It wasn’t on purpose. Just kinda popped into my head. But I think I can make it up to you.”

He looked up at me, surprised and offended by finding himself comforted in my arms. ”What could make that up to me.”

I shot him my cruelest grin and said, ”I want you to craft a weapon to terrify her.” His face lit up like a kid on Christmas morning, only slowly, like it couldn’t encompass all that joy at one time and had to implement it in stages. He stood there practically vibrating with the need to get to work. ”Go on, son. I’ve got to get to work, but I can’t wait to see your finished work.”

He paused, ”Even if it terrifies you too?”

”No. Especially then, son.”

I left his Workshop and slid the door shut on the sounds of boilers boiling, triphammers hammering, and furnaces roaring.

”Okay, Menace. I think he’s okay with rigging your glider for night flying, but you still need to ask him for that and night flying lessons. Got it?”

”Goddid.”

”Good.”

After that, the two of us played quiet toddler games, which this morning included a four way conversation between Menace, me, Vulcan, and Mister Kraken. When Marie and Saffron woke up, we went down and got breakfast, which still featured corncakes and tortillas, although the tortillas had a lot more spring vegetables in them, and we’d gotten some kind of fish cakes on the side as well. I had fun feeding Saffron, and for once she didn’t seem embarrassed. She practically hammed up her enjoyment of the syrup saturated corncake, and I loved every moment of it.

”You’re in rare form this morning.”

She Grinned at me. ”I’m not sure why it took so long, but somehow it just clicked. You’re not ashamed of me being weak like this, nor afraid of the consequences.”

”It’s not weak...”

She interrupted me. ”It absolutely is from my perspective, and I realized something more important.”

”Which is?”

She stopped, licked her lips and mine, not to mention my fingers and even up to my wrists. I hadn’t really been being careful with my Kitten feeding, because I really liked the way she habitually cleaned me up. ”For the first time in my life? Around you? With this? I feel completely safe being weak. No, that’s not it, not enough. I feel completely safe reveling in my weakness.”

I Grinned right back at her. ”If this is you ’reveling in weakness’? I’m more than ’not ashamed’. I think it’s fuckin’ awesome, and until and unless both of us are down to do it on the Lectern while the Council is in session, this qualifies as the most fun we can have in public.”

She leaned over, crawling on the table until we were forehead to forehead, nose to nose, and sang out, ”that makes it even better!” Then she giggled, leaned next to my ear, and whispered, ”not unlike reacting to you, and you alone, feeding me while I’m having to keep a straight face eating Driver’s crepes at the Grand Council breakfast...”

”Isnomi comes by her scamp honestly, I see...”

”...and more crepes in Driver’s kitchen.”

”Really?”

”...and waffles with the Lancasters, since I need to conference with them about moving the military through Lancaster today.”

”Oh fuck, Kitten...” I’d started laughing with my ’really’, and now it wouldn’t stop.

”...and maybe more waffles in the Lancaster House kitchen.”

I could barely get the words out, ”you done yet?”

Putting one finger to her lips in an adorable blend of ’did I forget anything’ and ’I done a bad thing, mommy’, she said, ”maybe one last me in the larder downstairs who stole another bottle of syrup when you started feeding me.”

I stared at her perfect little face, into her wide eyes with her perfect fake innocent expression until I couldn’t take it any more, pulled her to me with both hands and kissed her.

How often do you do this, Kitten?

This, like this? This is the first time, and from now on? Only when you’re feeding me. Because I know you, my wife, and I know that if you are consistent about anything, it is how you love to ’turn things up to eleven’. So for you, even my thrilled, shameful, exultant open revelry with sweets will be turned up to eleven.

I love you.

And I you, my Goddess, my Goof, my love, my wife.

When we finally broke liplock, I booped her on the nose and thought, still not telling you where I stashed Hilde.

Her jaw dropped. ”You think I did this to bribe you about that?”

I shook my head. ”No, I think you trusting me enough to do something you didn’t trust yourself with let you realize how much you could trust and let yourself go like this, with this.”

Any congealing hurt evaporated, as she pondered that. ”You may be right...”

Besides, someone may have whispered in her ear that once she’s removed the problems of ’too young’ and ’too desperate’, if she’s still interested she’s welcome to come surprise you. Those last couple words might be in the wrong order though.

She just blinked at me. ”You...”

”So, if you’re patient, and control yourself, and maybe get the slightest bit lucky, there will definitely be sweet treats in your future, Kitten.”

She teetered between laughing and outrage for a bit before tumbling off the table into my arms. ”You are awful and terrible and I love you with every bit of my tyrannical heart, Goof.”

”And you are adorkably beautiful, and I love you more than life itself, Kitten.”

”Why do I bother trying to tell you two to get a room?”

”Oh, stuff a sock in it, Raven. They’re adorable.” Good to know Angel was fully back to having our back without hesitation.

”My point exactly.”

After a morning spent Saffron watching, because I needed to keep myself focused, right after lunch I stepped onto Big Jarl Johnson’s Green. I hardly recognized the place; I mean, the Green had been flatter than most, but the grass had been trimmed down to a near level surface. Bleachers ringed the Green, the only gap being at the river next to the bridge, and people ranging from babes-in-arms to little old ladies filled them. They chatted with each other, passing bags of steaming stuff back and forth, some of them reaching in for snacks. When I showed up, the first who noticed pointed and called out something my brain translated as ”she’s here!” The cry ran along the bleachers. Some people shook their fists. Some waved. Most shouted.

I turned at motion from the end of the bridge. Big Jarl Johnson stood there with a dude he dwarfed by comparison, a dude in long, fancy, gilt robes. They both strode toward me until mage dude stood in easy conversational distance, Johnson hovering behind him. ”Jarl Diaz? This is Anundr the Mage, Duelist and Hero of Norfolk. Anundr? This is Jarl Diaz, who is dueling you to secure her right to challenge me. You will be dueling within the Green, and will begin when I call begin. Do you both understand?”

”Yep.”

”As we discussed, I do, Jarl Johnson.”

Johnson nodded. ”Good. Any other stipulations?”

Anundr glared at me. ”Will you accept a Summoning Duel, with our Summons limited to the Dueling field?”

”Uh... sure.” I paused. ”What’s a summoning duel? Do I need to go catch a field mouse and shove lightning bolt up its ass?”

He shook his head. ”We do not attack each other directly. We use Spells to summon up creatures, who then attack our opponent, who may summon creatures to defend themselves or to attack in turn.”

”Oh. Shit. I don’t know how to do that.”

A sleazy smile leaked across his face. ”You shouldn’t have agreed to it then.”

”I didn... fuck. I did, didn’t I. Shit. Wait, can you not summon anything cute and fuzzy? My daughter might be watching, and I don’t want her watching me off a bunch of kittens or some shit.”

”I do not agree to that. Thank you for the information, however.”

”You’re a fuckin’ piece of work, aren’t you?”

He shrugged. ”I kill people for money in front of spectators, and your problem is that I intend to use ’cute, fuzzy’ things to do so?”

”When I figure out a way to kill the fuck out of you without doing it myself, I’m gonna fap thinking about how hard I made you die.”

Fucker just laughed at me, so I stepped to the far side of the field, amplified my voice and called out, ”I’m ready.”

While Big Jarl Johnson did a whole announcement and buildup, which everybody in the stands cheered for, I thought, Boss?

Yes, Tabitha?

I can’t just Co-Locate one of me, call it a summon, and kill the fuck out of him, can I?

Of course you could. You’d just be accused of cheating by anyone who doesn’t understand how similar Summons and Co-Location are.

I sighed. Any people around who understand that?

You do, now.

I facepalmed. Anyone else?

I do. I suspect your wife would should she spend more than a moment thinking on it.

Anyone I can bring in to tell them I didn’t cheat?

Since I’ve declared myself your father and am therefore clearly biased? No.

Fuck.

Indeed.

After a second I thought, Can you teach me to Summon?

Only after I find someone to teach me.

Double fuck.

I wouldn’t know about that. I have no concubines.

I shook my head as Johnson started a countdown from ten. Thanks, Boss. You tried. You’re still the best.

I’m sorry.

”GO!”

I stood there as Anundr Shaped. A moment later an entire pack of wolves, dozens strong, appeared through a twist in space. Big fuckers. They charged toward me, howling enough to overwhelm the screams of excitement from the crowd. I shook my head, pulled my swordstave, and threw up an Air Shield behind me. I figured maybe I could bounce through them and go to town with the flats of the blades, maybe scare them off or beat them up instead of outright murdering a bunch of poor wolves.

Maybe fifty feet from me, as I braced myself to leap forward, the howling cut off like a switch, and the whole damn pack slid to a stop like ten feet away from me.

”Oh, shit. Really?” I stepped forward, one empty hand raised, palm up, below waist height. ”Wolfie? That you?” Once I got a closer look at him, I saw his fur had pale streaks, like scars covering him where a wyvern might have mauled him. ”My little Menace’s Wolf?”

He stepped up, sniffed my hand, tail wagging, and I ruffled the fur around his neck. Holding back laughter, I asked, ”hey, you see that guy in the robes over there?” He turned and looked. ”Yeah, he’s the one that summoned you here. Be careful, he’s a mage and shit, but can you guys maybe go kill him a bunch?”

He looked back at me, looked around at his pack, then growled a little. The rest of them turned, and they took off toward Anundr with a way more coordinated howl than what they’d done before. Johnson kept up his announcer schtick, saying, ”It looks like Jarl Diaz has coopted Mage Anundr’s Wolves! It’s a bold strategy, let’s see if it pays off for her!”

Fates smokin’ crack rock, I tell you.

In the time it took the wolves to cross half the Green, Anundr Shaped again, and half a dozen chunky big black bears dropped to the ground facing the incoming wolfpack. Before I could decide whether to go help or not, Anundr Summoned again. This time the things he Summoned didn’t drop. A pair of wyverns caught themselves in the air, then split up as they approached me. One went up, obviously prepping for a dive bomb. The other flew along the outside of the Green, angling to come at me from the side. I waited, watching, timing their approach. As they began their final charge, I powered up the Mana Blades on my swordstave, popping out big thin fuckers long enough to spit roast a fuckin wyvern. The Blades might not go through their hide, even if I focused all the force on one point, but so long as they had eyes, mouths, nostrils, and all purpose exit holes, I had targets. Besides, I still had the actual sword blades if I couldn’t keep them out of reach.

Of course, the moment I popped those big fucking Mana Blades? Both wyverns did absolute ’fuck this shit I’m out’ maneuvers. I winced as the one coming in from the side tumbled in a way that would carry them into the bleachers, but the moment before it hit, it winked out of existence. The one coming in from the top managed to pull up just in time to disappear before he turned himself into street pizza as well.

Boss? I didn’t think any wyverns survived that battle.

It was dusk, wyverns do prefer ambush tactics, and a Dragon had just arrived; likely any survivors scattered and hid.

Huh. Good to... fuck, can you tell the Norns to lay off the crack rock for just a little bit.

At the other end of the field, all but a few bears bunched in front of Anundr lay dead, the pack surrounding them. But a few pack members had already taken the same path of valorous discretion the wyverns had, because right in the middle of the Green an even bigger goddamned Dragon than the one we’d taken down hovered, screaming with rage.

Okay, Boss, how the fuck did he teleport a fucking Dragon here? Aren’t those fuckers Mana Resistant and shit? Fuck, aren’t the wyverns?

I’m impressed by his Mana capacity, really.

Not the time to be geeking out about the enemy’s big Mana dick, boss.

Of course, Champion. Summoning is quite like Co-Location, but it is not the same. If I remember the theory...

Incoming Dragon, Boss!

Right. Copies created with Mana, imbued with the mind of the Summoned entity.

I threw up a pair of Wards, one the strongest Mana Ward I could, the other a Ward against Fire as the Dragon landed right in front of me and brought its front claws down on top of me. My fuckin’ Mana Ward crunched, but held. The Dragon pulled its paw back, snarling and shaking it, then drew in a deep breath. At the very last moment I remembered, and threw up another Ward against Acid. A fucking avalanche of tiny melting, flaming bits of solidified acid washed over me. I glanced behind me, suddenly relieved at how the wyverns and wolves blinked away when they hit the edge of the Green.

Then the avalanche rolled over the edge of the green into the stands. Over the guys on their feet in front, caught still cheering, making the same wrong assumption I had. Over the teens behind them cowering, eyes wide. Over the woman who’d spun around, curling herself around the tiny figure in her arms.

Blind unthinking rage threw everything else from my head. ”No.”

I reached out toward the motionless woman through the still wireframe darkness. The next moment I lay on flat grass, the breath knocked out of me. Here, in the frozen moment between moments, nothing moved. Nothing could move.

Nothing looked down on me and screamed, ”WHAT HAVE YOU DONE WITH MY SON!”

The nothing in front of my eyes didn’t matter. Nothing mattered but a tiny body about to be scoured to slurry by sharpened crystals of burning acid. Nothing picked me up, slammed me back into the ground. ”MY SON! MY SENGANN! YOU REEK OF HIM! WHAT HAVE YOU DONE WITH HIM!”

I closed my eyes, rage buoying me, filling me, flowing into me like a tidal bore, more than I’d ever felt before. Nothing lifted me, shoved me toward the ground.

And the air went out of me as I stopped, hanging there in midair, grabbing at Nothing. ”Domnu.”

Everything that wasn’t slid toward me, focusing on me. My body vibrated with the power she poured into me, trying to force me down. ”WHERE! IS! MY! SON!”

Some tiny spark inside the rage ignited, like a pinch of copper salt throw into a bonfire. A handful. A bucketful. ”I dunno, Dommy. Maybe I smell so much like him because your son calls me Mommy too.”

Darkness poured down, condensing above me into a towering female figure, each finger of her hand big enough to squish Big Johnson like a bug. I felt the flow as she drew herself here, concentrated her power to squash the insolent insect mocking her loss. I remembered that flow, what Sengann had done when he pulled all the parts of himself together to face me. Before he knew who I was. I remembered threading my Mana Blade up through Odin’s thigh. Pushing my Blend up around everything but my body, I threaded myself through her. ”YOU DARE!” The weight of her anger, her power, bore down on me, crushing me.

Trying to, anyway. Dumb bitch. The depths, where everything crushed everything into something new? The ocean depths she thought of as hers? The depths of stars where she dare not tread? The depth of fallen stars? Mine. All mine. ”Wait, I remember last time I saw him! What did he say to me?” I paused as if in thought. Before she could scream in my face again, I called out, ”oh, yeah, I think it was something like, ’ooh, Mommy, so rough, you hurt me so good Mommy, you’re better than Domnu, don’t stop, Mommy, don’t stop, don’t stop, I think I’m gonna, I’m gonna,’ then I got bored with his selfish quickie having ass and burned him to death. Didn’t even get off on that; he was a completely useless bastard to his excruciatingly painful end.”

”I WILL...”

”Die horribly, screaming in cowardly terror and pain just like your fucking useless fucking son?”

She lifted me to hover in front of the blank dark oval of her face, snarling laughter echoing. I let her. ”Who are you to think you can end me? ME? I am Darkness incarnate, you insignificant insect. I am night. How can you end night itself?”

I remembered Saffron Shaping the illusion of emptiness above Bonnie and Larry’s wedding altar. I poured Mana into a memory. ”Look on my works, ye mighty, and despair. Bitch.” The globe floated between us. Night broken, shattered, scattered into a billion pockets of dim shadow by the unending glow of a hundred billion lights.

She gasped, and with every one of those tiny threads through her being, I pulled. Pulled every bit of her closer, denser, capturing her from the inside even more thoroughly than I’d cupped Sengann in my hands. She struggled, but I pulled Mana from inside her and crushed her down, crushed her with the weight of the sea, crushed her with the weight of fallen stars, crushed her until she floated in front of me, arm outstretched, hand squeezing my throat futilely. I gave her my best eyelids fluttering closed impending O face and said, ”ooh, Dommy Mommy kinky.” My eyelashes fluttered as she poured every bit of her strength into trying to crush the uncrushable, I moaned out, ”harder, Mommy, harder!”

She screamed, her face forming into something with a mouth that could scream, nostrils that could flare, eyes that could glare, and threw her other hand around my neck, squeezing with all her might. I tried to fake it, I really did, but the tiniest of chuckles escaped me, and that broke a damn dam. Laughter flooded out of me, shaking the wireframes of the world. Shaking the gaps between them. Vibrating the threads of me through her. I felt the first tiny chink in her rage, reached out, cupped her face in my hands, looking up with all the adoration of a lover or child. I pulled her to me, bending her arms while her hands still tried to crush my throat. I kissed her gently on the forehead, let her push me away just far enough to look her in the eye, and whispered quietly, breathily, intimately, ”you want to know who I am?”

I dropped my Blend.

”Hi, Mom.”

She shrieked. Writhed. Tried to run. Tried to disperse. Tried to move. I watched her, impassive, as her fear conquered her completely and she shuddered, screaming, trying to get way.

”So fuckin’ rude. No wonder you interrupted something important, really. I’ll be back in a sec... wait, no seconds here.” I did my best Austrian accent and said, ”I’ll be back.” I floated to the ground, then floated back up and backhanded her. ”SHUT THE FUCK UP!” She went silent and I floated back to the wireframe of the Dragon. ”Bitchy shrieking getting on my nerves.”

I looked up at the Dragon. ”Begone.” It shuddered, but remained. Rage overcame me again. Black fuzziness wrapped around the Dragon, squeezed, crushed it like a cheap beer can. Fluids leaked out everywhere, frozen in the act of being expelled. ”I SAID FUCKIN BEGONE, YOU DUMB DRACONIC FUCK!” I yeeted it into the sun. Okay, ’sunward’. I looked at the clouds of acid, crystallized and not. ”Go.” All of it disappeared, sucked back into a Draconic cloaca. I stepped over to the cowering Thralls, frozen as they dissolved. ”Be whole.” The front of the men, the arms of the cowering teens, the back of the crouched mother, all of it reformed in the wireframe.

I stepped back over to hover in front of Domnu. ”Do you know why you’re alive?”

”Vengeance,” she whispered.

I shrugged. ”Eh. I thought about it. Maybe, if you hurt somebody I cared about? But you haven’t done that. Yet. And if I kill you? That’s not vengeance. Y’know what vengeance would be?” She hung there, silent. ”A box.”

She whimpered. I reached out, lay my hands on her shoulders. ”But that’s not who I want to be, y’see. Unless you push shit in ways I can’t ignore? You get to live. You know why?”

”Mercy?”

I shrugged again. ”I guess this is merciful? Maybe? But honestly? I don’t give enough of a shit about you any more to even claim mercy.” She just whimpered at me. ”Do you know who does care about you?” She just whimpered more. ”HEY! DOMNU! YOU IN THERE STILL! Don’t go fuckin’ catatonic on me now.”

”Who cares, if not the daughter I imprisoned, abandoned, and killed?”

”Your granddaughter.”

”My...”

”Yeah. I got kids now, Mom. If you’re real obedient and convince me I can trust you near her? You’ll get to meet them, pretend to be something approaching a decent entity who cares about her kids, her grandkids.” She blinked, and I said, ”I know you can do it. Fake it, at least. You did it for Sengann.”

”And if I cannot?”

I reached through the fibers of me threaded through her and Mimicked her. Then I took control of her mouth and, in harmony with her said, ”I’ll do my best to make sure she never knows.”

She shuddered, then slumped. ”What must I do?”

I turned back to myself, lowered both of us to the ground, stepped us over to a couple dozen feet away from Anundr. ”Just do what I tell you.”

I pushed my Blend back up to normal, then spoke to Time itself. ”Go.”

Color bled back into the world. The Dragon shrieked as its corpse flew toward the sun. Which surprised me by looking like it fuckin’ dipped down to catch the fuckin’ thing in an absolutely unsurvivable embrace. In a voice amplified to carry over the whole fuckin’ stadium, I hollered, ”DOMNU! I choose you!” She stepped where I pointed in front of me, a woman shape formed out of an absence of light. The screaming from the stadiums cut off like I’d thrown a switch, replaced by a terrified stillness.

Anundr opened his mouth. Before he could say anything, I said, still amplified, ”that bystander-killing fuck stick pissed me off. End him. Painfully.”

Gotta say, though she is absolutely the actual True OG Bitch, Mom follows instructions really well.