I, the Villain, Become Invincible the More Descendants I Have

Chapter 34 Proclamation Against Cao CaoEmperor Cao Xukun was lying on a rocking chair in the courtyard, holding Crown Prince Cao Hao in his left arm and Cao Xuan in his right. Consort Su Qingyue was peeling grapes for him, Su Qingying was fanning him, and Empress Liu Ruyan and Lin Yueer were brewing tea nearby. His life was more comfortable than an immortal’s.

”I say, you two, don’t just fan me, massage my shoulders too.” Emperor Cao Xukun squinted his eyes, looking thoroughly satisfied. ”I arm-wrestled Li Tieniu yesterday and strained my arm; it’s still sore now.”

”Young Clan Leader, you really are something.” Su Qingying rolled her eyes, though her hands didn’t stop. ”Arm-wrestling someone at the Foundation Establishment Stage and still straining your arm? Who would believe that if it got out?”

”What do you know? I was letting him win on purpose to give him some face.” Emperor Cao Xukun spouted nonsense with a straight face. ”Otherwise, if he lost too miserably, he wouldn’t have the face to lead troops in the future.”

As soon as he finished speaking, hurried footsteps came from outside. Li Tieniu came rushing in, stumbling and crawling, clutching a crumpled piece of paper in his hand, his face green with anger. ”Young Clan Leader! It’s bad! Something big has happened! Those bastards from the Heavenly Dao Alliance are causing trouble!”

”What are you panicking about? If the sky falls, I’ll hold it up.” Emperor Cao Xukun didn’t even open his eyes. ”Did the Alliance Leader of the Heavenly Dao Alliance die? If he’s dead, just send a condolence gift—two steamed buns will do; any more is a waste.”

”No! He’s not dead! He has united with the three major sects of the Western Regions and issued some ’Manifesto Against Cao,’ cursing you to no end! They’ve also assembled an army of 100,000 and have already reached Hulao Pass on the border of the Central Plains!” Li Tieniu was trembling with rage and handed over the paper.

Emperor Cao Xukun finally opened his eyes slowly, took the manifesto, and glanced at it, nearly laughing out loud.

It read: ”The traitor Cao Xukun is a wolf by nature, wreaking havoc on the righteous path and poisoning the living. He forcibly abducts innocent women, occupies sects, murders elders, and commits treason. Even if all the bamboo in the Southern Mountains were used to write his crimes, it wouldn’t be enough; even if the waves of the Eastern Sea were drained, his evil could not be fully recounted. Now, we, the Heavenly Dao Alliance, have united with the righteous warriors of the Western Regions to raise 100,000 heavenly soldiers to crusade against the traitor Cao. We swear to trample the Cao family, purge the court, execute the treacherous sycophants, and return the Central Plains to a bright and clear world!”

Below that was a list of charges, such as ”stealing from the ancestral graves of the Qingyun Sect,” ”snatching candied haws from a three-year-old child,” and ”knocking on a widow’s door in the middle of the night.” It was fabricated so vividly that it was even more absurd than a storybook.

”What the hell! What kind of garbage is this?” Emperor Cao Xukun laughed so hard he slapped his thigh and threw the manifesto on the ground. ”This writing isn’t even as good as the picture descriptions my son Crown Prince Cao Hao writes! Stealing from ancestral graves? Do I look like I have that much free time? Snatching candied haws? Do I look like the kind of person who lacks three or five bucks?”

Consort Su Qingyue picked up the manifesto and looked at it, unable to help but laugh. ”They really can make things up. ’100,000 heavenly soldiers’? I think 100,000 rabble is more like it.”

”Exactly!” Su Qingying curled her lip. ”The Alliance Leader of the Heavenly Dao Alliance is just a keyboard warrior. He used to be beaten like a grandson by Young Master Xiao Chen, and now that Young Master Xiao Chen is crippled, he’s jumping out to act like a big shot.”

Li Tieniu was still furious. ”Young Clan Leader! They’ve already reached our doorstep! How can you still laugh? Hurry and give the order! I’ll lead 50,000 troops and guarantee I’ll wipe them all out within three days!”

”What’s the rush?” Emperor Cao Xukun waved his hand and sat up straight. ”It’s only 100,000 troops; it’s a small matter. It just so happens that our Cao Army hasn’t fought in a long time, so we can use them for practice and grab some military funds along the way. I heard the three major sects of the Western Regions are quite wealthy; this will be the perfect opportunity to empty their treasuries.”

He paused, then smiled and said, ”Besides, this manifesto is written so poorly, shouldn’t I go over personally and give them a writing lesson? Let them know what a real manifesto is.”

Meanwhile, at Hulao Pass, the Heavenly Dao Alliance camp was buzzing with activity.

Alliance Leader Wang Teng sat in the main seat, holding a wine glass in his hand, boasting spiritedly to the people below. ”Everyone! That brat Emperor Cao Xukun just had a stroke of luck and happened to win against Young Master Xiao Chen! He is just a playboy waste with no real ability!”

”This time, we have assembled 100,000 troops and have the support of the three major sects of the Western Regions. Trampling the Cao family will be as easy as turning over one’s hand! Once we break through Luoyang, Emperor Cao Xukun’s gold and silver jewelry, along with all his beautiful wives, will all be ours!”

”The Alliance Leader is wise!” The people below scrambled to flatter him.

The Sect Leader of the Western Regions’ Vajra Sect stood up, patted his chest, and said, ”Alliance Leader, rest assured! My Vajra Sect disciples all have skin of bronze and bones of iron, and they are invincible in charging and breaching lines! I guarantee we will be the first to break into Luoyang and twist off Emperor Cao Xukun’s head to use as a chamber pot!”

”Good!” Alliance Leader Wang Teng was overjoyed and raised his wine glass. ”Everyone! Finish this cup of wine! Tomorrow morning, the army sets out! Within three days, we will definitely break Luoyang!”

”Cheers!”

Everyone raised their glasses and drank them down in one gulp, each rubbing their hands together, as if they already had victory in their grasp.

Only a small disciple in the corner was shivering and muttering, ”But... I heard that Emperor Cao Xukun is already at the Late Nascent Soul Stage and crippled a Qingyun Sect elder with a single slash... Can we really win?”

”What are you afraid of!” The elder next to him glared at him. ”We have 100,000 people. Even if he is powerful, can he fight 100,000 people alone? Besides, Emperor Cao Xukun is just a lecher. When the time comes, we’ll send a few beauties over, and I guarantee his legs will turn to jelly!”

The small disciple wanted to say something else, but was kicked out by the elder. ”If you dare to shake the army’s morale again, I’ll kill you!”

When the news returned to Luoyang, the entire Cao family was in an uproar.

The disciples were all eager for battle, requesting to fight one after another. ”Young Clan Leader! Give the order! We have long wanted to have a fight with those bastards from the Heavenly Dao Alliance!”

”Exactly! They dare to steal our territory and curse our Young Clan Leader; we must show them what we’re made of!”

”Trample the Heavenly Dao Alliance! Capture Alliance Leader Wang Teng alive!”

Looking at the emotionally charged disciples, Emperor Cao Xukun nodded with satisfaction, stood up, and waved his hand. ”Good! Since everyone is so motivated, we will give them a surprise!”

”Li Tieniu!” ”Here!” ”I appoint you as the vanguard general. Lead 30,000 iron cavalry and rush to Hulao Pass overnight to give them a taste of our power first!” ”Understood!”

”Consort Su Qingyue, Su Qingying!” ”Here!” ”I order you to lead the Twin Squad, circle to the rear of the enemy army, and cut off their food and supplies!” ”Understood!”

”Empress Liu Ruyan, Lin Yueer!” ”Here!” ”I order you to stay behind in Luoyang to protect Crown Prince Cao Hao and Cao Xuan well and watch over the house!” ”Understood!”

Emperor Cao Xukun picked up the war god spear placed to his side, the tip pointing straight to the west, his eyes icy. ”Alliance Leader Wang Teng, is it? You dare to curse me? You dare to attack my territory?”

”Rest assured, I won’t let you die too painlessly.”

”I will let you know what it means to invite disaster through speech and what it means to regret too late.”

”Tomorrow morning, the army sets out! Trample the Heavenly Dao Alliance and sweep across the Western Regions!”