Massage Parlor for Unsatisfied Wives in Another World

”Oh, honey, you know what just occurred to me?”

”눈_눈, I hope it’s not something dangerous.”

”It’s not. I just thought that now you and I are in a fantasy world and all that, right?”

”...I guess you could look at it that way.”

I wonder where she’s going with this now.

”Well, what if we’re something like a story? Maybe we’re a novel, or a manga, or maybe an anime.”

”Haaah~ Obviously that line of thinking is wrong from the get-go. I’ve told you many times that you need to learn to separate reality from fiction.”

It seems like it wasn’t really anything important—just another one of her nonsensical ideas.

”Oh, but what if it really is like that? And the author is watching us. Oh! Hi, author! Could you send us a new MILF today?”

”Hey, cut out that nonsense and stop talking to thin air. You could end up developing some kind of mental disorder... something more serious or something like that, and there’s nothing watching us.”

I really can’t understand how she can even think that seriously, but, setting aside the disorder thing, I really want her to stop.

From what I understand, one of the initial symptoms of this world’s corruption is talking to yourself or hearing voices.

Obviously, this seems more like one of her bizarre ideas, but it’s better to stop thinking that something is watching us.

”Oh, you’re wrong, honey. The system is watching us... and maybe the it who controls it is, too.”

”...”

Well, that’s not a certainty, but at least as far as the system goes, she has a point.

”Oh! What if ’it’s the author? Oh! Come to think of it, aren’t we in some world from a novel, anime, or manga we’ve read? Ugh, we’ve read so many that I can’t remember.”

”No! (ㆆ_ㆆ), I remember every single one, and none of them match... No, more importantly, drop all that nonsense about the author and us being in a fictional world. Thinking like that is harmful in the long run. If you don’t stop, I’ll get mad and give you a lecture.”

I have to put that idea to rest or she might develop some kind of disorder and start talking to things that don’t exist.

”Honey, you’re getting in the way of my open-mindedness, which will lead me to see the fourth dimension. I’m about to see the truth of the world; I’ll look into the abyss and the abyss will look back at me, and I’ll ascend to a higher form of existence.”

”눈_눈, the only abyss you’ll see is the abyss of my lecture.”

”(￣)3￣) Honey, you lack creativity. Well, it wasn’t really that important anyway. The important thing is that we can go out today, right? We didn’t go out yesterday because you raised that flag.”

Well, luckily she easily put that absurd topic aside.

Like she said, we could go out every day for two hours, but we didn’t yesterday.

The reason was her—she told me that since I’d raised a flag, it was bound to be a hectic day and lots of unsatisfied MILFs would show up.

But that didn’t happen, and no one came by until the end of yesterday.

”Hmm, keep in mind that you have to rule out Amy’s kingdom. We can’t go back there—it’s dangerous.”

”Ah! Right. Hmm, I think the one at the academy. I want to see what it’s like. Hehe, I wonder if they have uniforms and if we can buy some. Hehe, we can use them for the occasional role-playing game.”

”...”

Hmm, I’m not going to say anything about that. If she wants to buy it and wear it, that’s her business.

Although I don’t think there’s such a thing.

Come to think of it, neither Bianca nor the triplets who come from the academy had a school uniform.

They all came in casual clothes. But then again, maybe it was just a coincidence that none of them wore one, or maybe they’re not allowed to wear uniforms outside of school.

Hmm, I think it’ll be hard to find one. Hmm, although the system sometimes seems to bring out things that weren’t there before, and maybe... no, it’s unnecessary to spend money on pointless nonsense like that.

”Well, honey, let’s go have fun on another date! Let’s reminisce about our school days.”

”I already told you this morning that Azalea’s probably coming today, But if you want to go out, we can synchronize and...”

”Nah! Forget it, honey! The date can wait until later. Azalea’s more important! Once she gets here, we’ll team up and buheuehueh.”

”Stop it. We still have to see if she’s had a change of heart or something in the last few days.”

Honestly, with Azalea’s arrival, I’m thinking of figuring out a lot of things. I also want to start making sure things between her and me don’t go in a direction that causes long-term problems.

Haah! Seriously, this kind of thing isn’t for me.

Yeah, I’ll think it over more thoroughly when she gets here and see how everything plays out.

For now, I’d better keep learning the runes and the mechanics behind the spells of...

”Honey!Explain it to me! Why isn’t it 100? Why?”

”Huh? Why are you yelling at me? Hey!.Stop shaking me !. What’s the problem now?”

Again, I don’t know what happened, but suddenly Iris raised her voice and started shaking me by the shoulders.

”Honey, I’m talking about your percentages toward me. Why aren’t they a perfect 100?”

”Huh?... Oh! You looked at my percentages?”

”Yes! Ah! You knew! Well, that’s not the point—the important thing is for you to tell me why ’Emotional’ is at 99, ’Carnal’ at 95, and ’Rational’ at 93. I asked the system, and it says you can go up to 100!”

”Ugh! Stop shaking me like that. Let me clear a few things up first.”

It seemed like I wasn’t going to get out of this topic, although I have to say it took her longer than I thought to figure it out.

Honestly, from the very first day I’d been trying to understand the percentages and functions of the stigma and everything else, I realized that, logically, we should be able to see each other’s stats.

I’d already seen her percentages for me.

___________________________

Emotional: 99%

Carnal: 98%

Rational: 96%

___________________________

And they hadn’t changed at all since the first time I saw them.

Now, as Iris says, even though it was obvious at first glance, I couldn’t help but wonder if these percentages were based on the assumption that 100% was perfect—which the system confirmed.

But I didn’t stop there. I asked if it was possible to increase that percentage even further, to which the system replied that it was.

Unfortunately, when I asked what that would mean, the system refused to answer.

But for some reason, at that moment, a peculiar memory popped into my head—of a novel that had something similar to our favorability meter, and what happened in it once the girls exceeded the 100% threshold was not at all desirable.

Maybe it has nothing to do with our situation, but that image of a girl holding a bloodied knife and laughing maniacally wouldn’t leave my head.

”Honey, are you listening to me?! Where’s my 100%?!”

”Ugh! I told you not to shake me. It’s true that you can reach 100%, but according to the system, a value above 90% is already very good and ensures a long and strong relationship that lasts a lifetime.”

Before, I didn’t know what my own percentages were with Iris, and I knew this might come up, so I asked the system several questions about it.

According to the system, 90% is already more than good, and not every couple even reaches that level.

In fact, I’m more surprised that my percentages were so high. I knew that at least one had reached ninety percent because we could merge, but I didn’t think they’d all be well above that and that one would reach the very top.

It really surprises me. It seems I haven’t fully understood these percentages yet, as I thought I had.

”But, honey, I’ve already caught you, and I’m supposed to have 100 percent in everything!”

”Stop talking like that. I’ve already told you how bad it sounds, and more importantly, I’ve already told you that, even though they might seem similar in several ways, we shouldn’t compare this to a game or something like that. In real life, nothing is perfect.”

”But, honey!”

The fact that she values me so highly is something I really appreciate, and I won’t lie: it eases a lot of the insecurities I still had.

Honestly, this is already more than I deserve, and I can’t ask for more... and I really don’t want to ask for more.

In fact, the possibility of what might happen if Iris were to go past 100% scares me a little, and I’d rather she stay right where she is.

”Haah~ Don’t really think about it so much. You know? I still doubt that this kind of thing can be quantified, let alone precisely... Besides, just so you know, you don’t have a hundred either. You’re at 99 for Emotional, 98 for Carnal, and 96 for Rational toward me.”

”Huh?! That can’t be!! My love for you should be at the maximum!”

”Well, according to this, that’s almost true, though you’re missing a percentage point. You know, the other two are separate matters. Hey, what are you doing right now?”

Suddenly, I saw Iris start to hold her breath, straining in some way. I don’t know what she was trying to do, but her face seemed to be turning red, and it even looked like some veins were starting to bulge.

”Ugh!! I’m going to raise my percentages.”

”Hey, those things won’t go up just because you want them to. In fact, according to the system, the rational aspect depends a lot on...”

I had to fall silent, because I noticed that, suddenly...

___________________________

Emotional: 99%

Carnal: 99%

Rational: 99%

___________________________

I watched as her percentages actually went up. That was unprecedented.

I’d already built a logical framework based on the information I’d obtained from the system, and although I’d just thought it needed a revision, what Iris did made me realize I had to rethink everything from scratch.

She flushed my logical framework down the drain.

”Phew, how about that now, honey?”

”How the hell did you do that?”

”Hehe, with guts, willpower and, obviously, the power of love.”

”...”

If that answer doesn’t help at all, there must be an explainable logical process behind this change, but Iris probably did it intuitively, perhaps using ’Emotional’ as a lever.

Haah~ Yeah, I guess there’s no point in looking for an answer.’

Iris just does impossible things from time to time, and it’s better not to waste energy thinking about how—since even if I were right, there’s no way to prove it, because she herself wouldn’t know how she did it.

”Okay, honey, now it’s your turn. I want those percentages to reach 100, just like mine.”

”...I don’t think I can do that (ㆆ_ㆆ).”

Hmm, it seems there was a misunderstanding... but I think it’s best not to say anything about it.

Now I’m more worried that it’ll reach and exceed 100%, if it knows that’s not what it has.

”Come on, honey, it’s not that hard. You just have to do the same thing I did.”

”And I’m telling you, I don’t know what the hell you just did.”

”Guts, willpower, and—”

Iris’s explanation—which was useless even if I listened to it again—was cut off mid-sentence. The reason, I suppose, is that, just like me, she heard the notification in her head.

[New client detected! New mission received!]

[New mission received.]