Massage Parlor for Unsatisfied Wives in Another World

”Oh, this is delicious, don’t you think, honey?”

”...Yeah, it has a unique flavor.”

I was keeping track of the time in my head—there were about 15 minutes left before these two hours of freedom were up.

Whether by luck or not, we ended up finding a ramen shop that served exotic meat—or at least that’s how it seemed to us.

The creature—which looked like a very fat feline with horns and was obviously not from our world—caught Iris’s eye because it met all the criteria, even though here it might be considered a very common type of meat.

It was strange, but since it wasn’t humanoid either, I ate it—and, curiously, it was delicious.

It has a refreshing flavor, and the broth is delicious. At least it doesn’t resemble anything I’ve eaten before.

”Oh, honey, I just thought of something!”

In the middle of our meal, Iris seemed to think of something.

”What is it now? Remember, we don’t have much time left. As soon as we’re done, we’ll head back. If you want to do anything else, it’ll have to wait until tomorrow.”

”No, it’s not about that... hmmm, how should I put this... as you know, I like women.”

”...yes.”

As always, I don’t understand where Iris’s thoughts are going, or what she’s trying to get at by bringing up that topic so out of the blue.

So it was best to let her continue explaining her point until I could understand it.

”And besides you, I don’t like men, so, as you say, I think I’m a lesbian.”

”...Yeah.”

”So... do you remember that sex toy I bought, the one that vibrated and even wiggled? It had lots of different speed and intensity settings.”

”...Yeah, I got rid of that thing the day you bought it.(ㆆ_ㆆ)”

”You should’ve tried it before doing that.”

”No way, and if you’re getting at the fact that you want to buy another one, I won’t do it... unless you want it for yourself.”

The truth is, I still didn’t understand her point or what she was getting at, but I do remember that toy.

It really seemed normal to me for a woman to have that kind of thing. The problem is that Iris bought it to use on me; that thing was huge.

”No! I don’t need it. My level of satisfaction is already at its peak just with you... I really can’t keep up with you. Luckily, building our harem is going well.”

”...Honestly, I still don’t know what to think about that, but then, what was it you wanted to tell me?”

”Oh! Right. I wanted to ask you a question. Honey, you who know everything—can you explain something to me?”

”No, I don’t know everything—I just know what I know—but go ahead and ask. Maybe I can answer.”

When it comes to Iris, even if I do my best to understand or predict where she’s going with this, I almost always fail.

She’s just too unpredictable.

”Honey, lesbians are supposed to like women, right? So why are most of their sex toys things like dildos and stuff like that? Shouldn’t they want toys that represent another woman, like the ones men use?”

”(￣ー￣)...”

Yeah, I wasn’t expecting that question, and I didn’t even know what to think about it...

Even though it may seem silly and not even worth thinking about, now that she brings it up, it’s true that, at the very least, she’s not entirely wrong.

”Honey, you have a lot more experience than I do. Tell me, have you ever seen a video of a woman using a toy that simulates a woman? You know, like a doll or something like that.”

”...No, but it must exist. It’s just not among the genres I usually... Actually, let’s not talk about this while we’re eating.”

At first, I didn’t mind us talking while we ate, since Iris was speaking softly and it would be weirder for two people to just eat while staring at each other, but now I regret it a little.

”But it’s important. Besides the one I gave you, you always buy the others we usually use, and now with Sister Rose, I think we need to buy things to have fun. But even though I like women too, I don’t know what Sister Rose likes. I think it’s unnecessary to buy a dildo when we have you, honey, but that’s all I could think of—that and vibrators, anal plu—”

”Stop! seriously! Now’s not the time. Let’s talk about it when we get back.”

Iris and the concept of embarrassment were worlds apart, and she really didn’t mind talking about these private matters in public.

Luckily, no one was close enough to us.

In this small restaurant, it’s just the two of us and another group about two tables away...

Huh?... Those people—I think I saw them earlier at the market.

At that moment, I realized I’d seen that group of four while Iris and I were shopping. It might just be a coincidence, but...

”Huh? What are you looking at?... Oh! Four suspicious people who are surreptitiously staring at us with bad intentions... Honey, I can feel it—a classic cliché scenario is coming our way.”

”Haah~.”

Iris really does have a way of understanding people’s intentions beyond my own reasoning sometimes, but I really hope she’s wrong this time.

..

.

”Honey, they can’t catch up to us. That means they aren’t that strong. We can beat them if we fuse.”

She wasn’t wrong

”It’s best to avoid any unnecessary conflict... and if it’s unavoidable, it’s better to lure them into the massage parlor to be on the safe side.”

As soon as we left the restaurant, the group followed suit.

We tried to lose them in the crowd, but as if they had their sights set on us, they followed us into the alleys leading to the massage parlor, so I decided we had to run.

At first I was running on my own, but I fell far behind Iris, and she seemed to come up with a solution.

She picked me up like a sack of potatoes and carried me.

I certainly didn’t say anything, since it seemed more efficient and, conveniently, allowed me to see our pursuers.

I looked back, and it wasn’t just the four from before. Now there were more—seven people in all. Interestingly, most of them were women; there was only one man.

He and another woman with reddish-brown hair seemed to be the leaders. I think they’re all Beastkin ; some had horns, but I’m going to assume they’re beastmen based on horned animals.

Iris, even while carrying me, was able to keep her distance from them.

They were a little too far away to hear them, but I could see their faces and read their lips a little, and it seemed they’d noticed that our purchases had disappeared.

In fact, we bought a lot of things, and when I couldn’t carry any more, I gave them to Iris so she could discreetly put them in her storage.

Apparently, they noticed and assumed we had an expensive storage item, and also, for some reason, they seem to know that our rank is low.

The storage issue was my oversight.

On the other hand, upon closer examination, as Iris says, they don’t seem to be that strong. They just seem to be second-, third-, or fourth-rank individuals, and only the female leader appears to be fourth-rank.

Somehow, that’s what I thought as I tried to figure them out. I don’t know where that strange feeling and certainty came from, but it’s probably due to my perception stat.

Even so, Iris is only at rank 2 and I’m at rank 1, and they were closing the gap more and more.

It seems like it’s only a matter of time before they catch up to us, but I think we’ll make it to the massage parlor before they do.

None of them seemed to have an agile-type class... but even so, it was strange that Iris could almost keep up with them...

”love, why are you so fast?”

”Heh, heh! Well, maybe I can’t hide in the shadows like Sister Rose does, but when I activate the ability in the shadow beneath my feet, it’s like I’m stepping on trampolines.”

”That... is ingenious.”

Iris had shown me before how the darkness seemed to make her bounce when she wanted to enter, but to have used it this way and in such a short time is something only she is capable of.

”Hueh~ Praise me more,hueh~. You know, it’s also because I’m investing my stats wisely.”

”...hmm”

Come to think of it, I haven’t checked the Iris status window lately...

_________________

Name: Iris Rothwell

Race: Elf

Gender: Female

Profession: Massage Therapist (2)

Sub-profession: Berserk

Rank: 2

Stats:

Strength: 22

Dexterity: 27

Vitality: 22

Defense: 50

Mana: 5

Charisma: 9

Perception: 3

Corruption: 0

_________________

”hehe, I didn’t waste my stats completely. The martial art boosts my strength and vitality, and we have the ability to always keep our defense maxed out, so I focused on dexterity and only put a few points into strength and vitality.”

”Hmm, I thought you’d put them into something like mana. Don’t you want to learn magic or stuff like that?”

”Of course I do, honey! But System-chan told me I’d have to study a lot, so, honey, you’re going to specialize in mana. That way, when we fuse, we’ll have all the bases covered, and I’ll be able to use the magic you learn.”

”...I see you’ve already thought this through.”

She was good at things like this; I hadn’t told her anything, but I’d planned to practice breathing exercises and focus on mana, since I know I’m physically terrible and it was the most efficient path.

”Oh! Now that I think about it, I haven’t used the other fifteen points yet. Alright, all of them to Dexterity.”

And, unlike me—who’s still hesitating about whether to use my stats—Iris didn’t seem to hesitate at all and used them right away, which instantly increased our speed.

I saw how that prevented our pursuers from getting any closer. They definitely wouldn’t catch up to us before we reached the shop... or so I thought, until the woman leader seemed to rummage through her clothes and pulled out a strange orange crystal.

I went on high alert when her made a motion as if to throw something, but the object didn’t seem to be headed toward us; instead, it traced an arc over our heads and fell in front of us.

”Watch out ahead.”

”Ugh! That was close.”

It seemed to have been done on purpose, so I warned Iris.

I wasn’t looking ahead, so I didn’t see what she did, but Iris seemed to have to stop suddenly.

”Haha! Well, little rats, there’s nowhere left to run.”

And in that brief moment, it was enough for them to catch up to us. Iris, who seemed to realize that a fight was inevitable, put me down and stepped between the group and me.

”Honey, stay behind me—I’ll handle this!”

I looked at what had stopped us—it was a kind of transparent wall, something I suppose was made with this world’s magical technology.

I looked at Iris in front of me, and she really seemed ready to fight. She even pulled out the big axe I’d bought her before we left.

”Hahaha~, how cute. I see you two are a couple... hmm, I’m a little sensitive about situations like this...”

The woman who seemed to be the leader turned away as if she didn’t want to see what was about to happen.

I could tell it was just an act—an act performed by someone who thinks she has total control over what’s going to happen—and the only man there seemed to play along.

”Ha~, don’t worry, sister-in-law, this will be quick. We’ll take care of it fast... Oh! But if the woman turns out to be pretty, we won’t kill her. We have to do whatever we can to recoup the cost of the artifact that was used. Girls, let’s go—”

Bang! Bang! Bang!...

But before they could finish their stupid act... several consecutive shrill sounds rang out, and everyone who had been following us fell.

”...”

”...”

There was a brief silence... but finally Iris reacted and turned toward me.

”Honey! That’s a gun.”

”Yeah.”

The source of the noise was, in fact, the gun in my hand. I’d bought Iris an axe; for my part, I’d also bought a gun for self-defense and didn’t hesitate to use it.

”Honey, this is a world of swords and magic—why are you using a firearm?”

”...They were selling it at the store (ㆆ_ㆆ), and it was cheaper than your axe.”

”But we were supposed to fight with my axe and your magic, not with that.”

”I don’t know how to use magic. Besides, there’s no reason for us to follow that kind of logic and limit ourselves.”

Yeah, it only cost 500 Myrr. Compared to the axe that cost me 1,000, it seemed more useful—though, of course, I’ll have to keep buying ammo if I keep using it.

I know how to use it because there was a time when Iris got interested in firearms, and, wanting to do everything by the book, we joined a club where they taught us how to use them.

I didn’t think I was that good—in fact, Iris was much better than me—But the seven of them were very close to us, and they didn’t seem to understand what I was holding.

And, more importantly, they were totally underestimating us. Even when Iris pulled out her big axe, to them it still seemed like just a game, and to them we were still easy prey... those were their mistakes.

”Honey, you’re no fun at all! I knew it would’ve been better if we’d gotten an urban system—that suits you better. You would’ve been a great underworld boss or a successful billionaire.”

”...Anyway, that doesn’t matter. That barrier is gone, so let’s get back. We’re running out of time... Huh? Damn itQ, Iris, let’s fuse.”

I wanted to wrap this up and get out of here, but I noticed something and quickly asked Iris to fuse with me. This seemed like the safest way to handle things.

”Huh? Oh! All right, honey. Say it with me: Fusion! (/≧▽≦)/”

”Fusion (ㆆ_ㆆ)”

Iris didn’t seem to understand why I asked her to do that, but she didn’t refuse my request to merge, and without giving it much thought, she lunged toward me without letting go of that huge axe—which, in my opinion, she should handle with more care...

..