Back Then, I Adored You

What can I say? Would it help if I say anything? Should I ask him if the announcement going viral on the internet is true?

Whether she was going to ask him about it or congratulate him for it, it was like rubbing salt in her own wound.

Qin Zhi’ai looked down to hide the sadness in her eyes and remained quiet.

Gu Yusheng waited for her to say something but soon realized she wasn’t going to ask him anything. He then said in a casual tone, “I’m leaving then if you have anything to talk to me about.”

Qin Zhi’ai finally responded, but she only said, “Okay.”

Gu Yusheng did not say goodbye to her. He stood there without leaving and fumbled for a pack of cigarettes in his pocket. He pulled out one cigarette, put it between his lips, and lit it up with a lighter. He turned to Qin Zhi’ai and said, “I’m really leaving now.”

Qin Zhi’ai nodded without saying anything.

Gu Yusheng took a puff and then looked at Qin Zhi’ai through the smoke before he walked away.

As he walked past her, a tear dropped from the corner of Qin Zhi’ai’s eye onto her finger. She didn’t dare move and was afraid of losing control before he walked away.

She had her head down and stood there quietly for a long time. Without wiping the tears on her face, she turned to walk back to her mother’s apartment when the wind and rain got heavier. She looked up and froze in place before taking a step forward.

She thought Gu Yusheng had left, but there he was, leaning on a pillar of the pavilion in the dark and rainy night with a cigarette between his fingers, casually taking puffs.

He didn’t leave?

Qin Zhi’ai looked a little shocked with her reddish eyes.

Gu Yusheng gave her some time to digest her emotions even though he knew she had turned around. He took the cigarette out of his lips but remained leaning on the pillar. He said casually, “Xiao’ai, I didn’t leave the first time I told you I was going to. And I was waiting for you to ask me to stay the second time when I told you I would leave you.”

Qin Zhi’ai could clearly feel her heart jump. It seemed to miss a beat at first and then started to race after that.

The pavilion fell silent again.

Gu Yusheng raised the cigarette to his mouth and took a puff. After he slowly blew the smoke out, he asked again, “Xiao’ai, do you really have nothing to say to me?”

Qin Zhi’ai had gotten what Gu Yusheng meant this time. He wanted her to ask him if he really married Liang Doukou.

She was not stubborn, nor was she afraid to know the news was real. She actually did not want Gu Yusheng and his grandfather to have any conflict because of her.

Gu Yusheng knew what she was thinking. He heaved a light sigh. It sounded like he did not know what to do, but then he compromised. “Silly girl, why are you always thinking of me? Don’t you know you need to think of yourself, too?”

His simple words made Qin Zhi’ai’s eyes turn even more red.

“Do you know I feel bad when you always think about me first?” Gu Yusheng stubbed out his cigarette and straightened himself to walk toward her. He stopped to look at her moist eyes when he was three feet away from her. He watched her eyes for a while before asking, “Do you still love me?”